I'm a pagan...I'm a liberal..I live in West, Texas..

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

IT WILL TAKE 2 TRIPS..BUT IM HAULING ASS


going to go take some pictures of the town before the traffic gets her and then will take some of the traffic..we have put in a new signal light since last west fest..that should be good for a few laughs..took some pictures here in the library and going to take picts of my sweet little town..will see ya'll tomorrow at 3pm...library closed friday and sat. and sunday and monday so wont be back till tuesday..unless david's computer is fixed...damn..i will be going into withdrawl..starting to get a nervous twitch in my neck just thinking about it...damn..fuck...oh man...this is enough to piss off the pope...

SOONER'S POST


i thought since i really didnt have much to blog about i would go back and read sooners post from the beginning..leaving messages on each one..well, almost each one..and its sooo funny...you can almost see where the crazy shit starts to get out of hand and he just fucking loses control and the crazyness just takes over...we have created a gigantic monster and i for one...love it...how did i ever ever...ever get along with out knowing soonerboy...i can die happy now...i have met the sooner..and it is all good..

BLOGGER PEOPLE ARE GOOD PEOPLE

have been jumping around reading eveyones blogs about what they think about katrina and the lives she has destroyed ...and im really proud of all of you for your thoughts and prayers plus all the donations..i would like to thank you for not being a red state or a blue state but for being good americans...the goddess said she is very proud of her children...

REVENGE SHARON OSBOURNE STYLE


sometimes you gotta just laugh and walk away...this was in dallas am news yesterday...

How do you silence Iron Maiden singer Bruce Dickinson? you pull the plug during his band's show, of course.Sharon Osbourne, wife of rocker Ozzy Osbourne, admitted she cut the band's power during a concert on this summer's Ozzfest tour."yes, I did cut Iron Maiden's sound," Ms.Osbourne said in a letter to Iron Maiden's manager, Rod Smallwood. Among other misdeeds, she accused Mr. Dickinson of bad-mouthing her husband from the stage throughout the tour. During the same show this month, Iron Maiden's memebers were pelted with eggs and debris from the crowd."was Dickinson so naive to think that I was going to let him get away with talking (shit) about my family night after night?" Mr. Smallwood, on Iron Maiden's web site, said the band deserved an apology.

yeah, there's a big chance of Sharon saying im sorry to them...heehee..more like fuck you very much....

people are funny

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

4500 BLOGEYES.....BOY HOWDY

wow...how cool..thank you one and all...beers are on me at sooner's ...byob...(bring your own brownies)

MONDAY WAS A GOOD DAY AND NIGHT


i feel guilty..while mississippi, la, and other parts of the south are getting wailed on by katrina i had a most excellent day..and i really feel guilty..seems bad somehow to have such a great day while people are losing their homes and lives...
but i still had a good day.we are actually experiencing fall weather here in the little town of west...then monday morning my friend debi and her niece came by as i had checked out janet ivanovich's latest book for them to read...gave her some friendship bracelets that i had braided, a journal for her daughter samantha along with some old rock and roll cassetts..oingo boingo, morrisey, u2, dead kennedys, dead milkmen(????? names may be wrong), ziggy marley and some others..and got invited to a bbq next monday at their place out in the country..goodie..
we also talked about when the giant great dane "baby" adopted me.so that was nice...then went to the library where henrietta had cataloged the historian and i got to be the first one to read it..its about drakula, vlad the inpaler..so far it is really good. but as big as a dictionary...then i spent 4 hours here in the library catching up on blogs and posting new blogs which is getting to be more fun all the time...but beginning to think it is a little weird that you folks are starting to take up more of my time and feelings than friends and family...oh well...
then i went and bought 2 disposeable cameras and going to go around town and take pictures and take them at west fest and get them on my blog site if it kills me..took picture of the gigantic czech flag that is flying down at bolton's chevy dealership...big ass flag..usually it is the texas flag waving but for west fest the czech flag goes up..and man the clouds..they were just beautiful yesterday and today also...i love texas clouds..then watched the monday night football game til it was a rout and then watched the rest of prison break....yeah right...that could happen...speaking of which ..what ever happened to juday tanuda...she was soooo funny and i miss her..dont you know she would have some great things to say about what is going on in the news today? then i watched letterman which was really good. had great top ten list of why bush knows he's having a bad vacation...pretty damn funny. then john macenro was on and he was good. then andy dick got on and we found out why his last name is "dick"...what a putz...
but the capper of the night was a 2 hour rock and roll documentary on "queen"...it was soo good..miss freddy mercury..so it was a great day and night..then i turn on news this am and the horrow and distruction in mississippi was heart breaking..and i have friends that live near new orleans and cant get a hold of her..and doesnt mentalheathrn live in mississippi? how is she...has anyone heard...well, shit..im so ate up with guilt for having a good day. going to go to church and light some more candles...maybe redo my check book and see if i cant come up with another $10 for red cross...

Monday, August 29, 2005

I LOVE PBS..


sat is great for cooking show on pbs..there is one that is my favorite..not so much for the recipes or the cooking knowledge but just to listen to the "chef"...it is called capfire cafe..and the cook is either from broken pelvic, idaho, or pubic hair, wyo. or maybe dipshit,alabamahe cracks me up..this week he was making a dressing and it called for "ball sam-ik vin'ger"...i swear that is what he called it.. i laughed so hard rocky got up and left the house..sat. night we had one of those lovely texas rains...soaked the yard good, watered my plants and i went out and did my little rain goddess thank you dance...got mud all over the kitchen floor...oh well.i have been in such a happy happy happy mood...the cowboys have won 2 straight...beat houston which will give me some thing to rub in on the houston kinfolk if i go to the reunion..still havent decided if im going or not..if i dont and stay in west i will take pictures of my little town and send them out..still trying ot figure out how to scan and put on blog site..no one here knows how to use it...doh...i just finished reading a book i had read before and enjoyed and thought i would recommend it to you ..it is american tabloid by elroy lenord or lenord elroy one of the two..i have old farts desease...i had a weepy phone call with the little goddess and she said i must say im sorry to my son for what i said about his wife...so i did..i emailed it to him..was going to call but my luck she would answer the phone and ..well, we wouldnt want that...so im sorry....no matter how funny i thought it sounded or how pissed i was at her i should not have said it and especially on my blog site and then ask him to read it..kind of shitty of me...but i never said i was a nice person...so anyhow..we'll see how that bit goes...im almost embarrased to say this..but i want soap operas..or day time dramas as they like to be called now...i started out 40 years ago watching another world and days of our lives... when they took another world off the air i was pissed for three years..hell, im still pissed about it...now i watch days, general hospital(just to see sonny grin and see those dimples) guiding light( i like reva, she's nuts), young and the restless just to see if victor will ever change his expression or grow a personality..i used to watch bold and the beautiful but that one chick who sleeps with all the forrester men creeps me out..she has been down on everything but the titantic..kind of like sonny on general hospital..who gets more ass than a toilet seat...but something that i noticed on them is the amt of plastic surgury they have had...and how fucking skinny they are...the actress that plays hope on days of our lives looks like a walking talking skeleton ...and the actress that plays caroline has had so much surgury that he teeth dont even fit her mouth anymore..she looks like that scary guy that played the preacher in poltigist 11..she looks like she is near death...and there is so much collegen in the lips of the woman on bold & beautiful(taylor??) that if she bit her lip she would drown before anyone could get her to the hospital...im not against plastic surgury but there is a point where these people are starting to look un human...or not human...they look chinese...no wrinkles, no fat, no bags, no .....nuffin..what the fuck do they eat to get so skinny..or do they eat at all...?? pretty weird...but if i had the money i would get clipped, snipped, tucked, sucked and have every thing lifted but my personality...you would be able to build another person with the fat they could get off me..yeah, like that is going to happen...

DALLAS PAPER HAD ALL KINDS OF GOOD SHIT THIS PAST SUNDAY


man, what a bunch of good stuff i have to blog about..dallas am news was chock full of good stuff. stupid stuff and stuff that makes you be grateful there is a 5 day waiting to buy guns...ok, here goes..
COUPLE'S HOME A TV TARGET..
la habra, calif.. acouple whose home was wrongly identified on national television as belonging to an Islamic radical has faced harassment, and police are providing special protection.
After the news report ran on fox news on aug 7th, people have shouted profaities at Randy and Ronnell Vorick and spray-painted "terrorist"(spelling in "terrist")on their property.
"im scared to go to work and leave my kids home. I call them every 30 minutes to make sure they're ok,", Mr. Vorick said.
JOhn Loftus, a former federal prosecutor who hosts inside scoop with john luftus, gave out the house address during the broadcast.
Police have patrolled their house since the day after the broadcast and now have a squad car across the street.
He said the home belonged to Iyad Hilal, whose group, Mr. LOftus said, has ties to those responsible for the July 7 bombins in London. But Mr. Hilal moved out of hte house about 3 years ago..
Mr. Loftus apologized but also said:"mistakes happen....That was the best information we had at the time"
well, kiss my ass and call me friendly...what an asshole...some fucking mistake..no accountability for the fucker..some one should kick his ass..
now this article is about the earth and the core of the earth that is found to be spinning faster than the plantet..
the solid core taht measures about 1,500 in diameter is spinning about one-quarter to one-half degree faster per year, thatn the rest of the world.The spin of the earth's core is an important part of hte dynamo that created the planet's magnetic field and they believe that magnetic interaction is responsible for the different rates of spin..they calculated that the core is spinning slightly faster than the rest of hte lanet and is a bit lumpy...ok, ill buy that...makes sense...BUT WHAT THE FUCK DOES IT MEAN????
is the earth going to spin out of control? are we going to go hurtling thru space all of us being flung of the earth into the wild blue yonder???pisses me off. now i have something else to fucking worry about...assholes..
one of the few things g. gordon liddy has ever said that i agree with...
the problem REv. Robertson has is you can be a politcal leader, you can be a religious leader, but it's very difficult to be both..."..no shit sherlock.

Shreveport, La. police say:
that a man apporached a clerk at a convenience store after spending 40 minutes in the bathroom, stuck his hand under his shirt, and announced that he was robbing the store and had a gun..
the clerk told the man she knew it wasn't a gun, and they argued, then scuffled.
the clerk grabbed a baseball bat from behind the counter and began to beat him, then noticed the fork under his shirt. she chased him from the store, still hitting him with the bat.
a customer took a pistol from his car, fired it in the ground and held the man for police. police said
Derrick Dwayne Franklin, 24, was taken to jail on a charge of attempted armed robbery..
WHAT A SCHMUCK....yes, i know it means prick in yiddish...gave me a good laugh though

something for all you people that are screaming about how we are in iraq to give them freedom..

"THIS IS THE FUTURE OF THE NEW IRAQI GOVERNMENT..IT WILL BE IN THE HANDS OF THE CLERICS. I WANTED IRAQI WOMEN TO BE FREE, TO BE ABLE TO TALK FREELY AND TO BE ABLE TO MOVE AROUND. I AM NOT GOING TO STAY HERE"....DR. RAJA KUZAI, SECULAR SHITE MEMBER OF IRAQ'S NATIONAL ASSEMBLY..AUG. 24TH..
the iraqi women will have less freedom now after bush's little run for freedom for the people of iraq than they did before..

some controversial comments by pat robinson...
I THINK FEDERAL JUDGES ARE DESTROYING THE FABRIC THAT HOLDS OUR NATION TOGETHER.THE GRADUAL EROSION OF HTE CONSENSUS THAT'S HELD OUR COUNTRY TOGETHER IS PROBABLY MORE SERIOUS..THAN A FEW BEARED TERRORISTS WHO FLY INTO BUILDINGS..(ROBERTSON SAID THIS THIS YEAR ON ACTIVIST JUDGES)

"WHEN LAWLESSNESS IS ABROAD IN THIS LAND, THE SAME THING WILL HAPPEN HERE THAT HAPPENED IN NAZI GERMANY. MANY OF THOSE PEOPLE INVOLVED IN ADOLF HITLER WERE SATANISTS, MANY OF THEM WERE HOMOSEXUALS. THE TWO SEEM TO GO TOGETHER...(HE SAID THIS IN 93 WHEN THEN PRESIDENT CLINTON ANNOUNCED HE WAS ORDERING AN END TO A BAN ON GAYS IN THE MILITARY.)

"I WOULD WARN ORLANDO THAT YOU'RE RIGHT IN THE WAY OF SOME SERIOUS HURRICANES AND I DON'T THINK I'D BE WAVING THOSE FLAGS IN GOD'S FACE."(HE SAID THIS ABOUT A GAY EVENT IN FLORIDA IN 98)

IN A FUND-RAISING LETTER IN 92 IN OPPOSITION TO A PROPOSED EQUAL RIGHTS AMENDENT TO THE IIOWA CONSTITUTION, MR. ROBERTSON SAID IT WAS PART OF A "FEMINIST AGENDA" THAT"IS NOT ABOUT EQUAL RIGHTS FOR WOMEN." INSTEAD, "IT IS ABOUT A SOCIALIST, ANTIFAMILY POLITICAL MOVEMENT THAT ENCOURAGES A WOMEN TO LEAVE THEIR HUSBANDS, KILL THEIR CHILDREN, PRACTICE WITCHCRAFT, DESTROY CAPITALISM AND BECOME LESBIANS"...LATER MR. ROBERTSON SAID AN AIDE WROTE THE LETTER...
yeah right..

wow, and you all wonder why i find the christian right so loathsome...


and best of the best ..the sunday doonsbury...
"good news, folks! My partner here has just returned from right-wing radio's latest "truth tour" in Iraq!So, Chase-did you ever leave the safety of the green zone?"
"are you kidding? My producer and i toured the real bahdad.We didn't just report from our hotel rooms like the liberal media!"
"So what'd you find?"
"Wall to wall good news. For instance, Iraqi's now average 10 hours of electric power every day, not the 9 hours you always read about.and we only saw 30% unemployment not the 35% reported in cnn horror lies. and the "200" civilians who die every week according to the left wing press? well, guess what?it's barely 195. the streets are much less dangerous than the liberal media want you to think. our convoy only came under fire twice.I've never felt safer."
"really? how did your producer feel?"
"well, he was kidnapped, but that could have happened anywhere"



yup, i love doonsbury...

so that is my news for the day....
and always remember to be alert.....the world needs more lerts..

Saturday, August 27, 2005

SOONER'S RECREATIONAL POT TAKES A DETOUR

read in the dallas am news that they busted two guys with 600 lbs of pot, someplace in oklahoma..there goes sooners supply for the bar. damn...that will cut back on the brownies.

Thursday, August 25, 2005

WELCOME TO BLOGVILLE, BABY GODDESS


Well, i finally wore her down..my daughter is now a blogger...and not afraid to let anyone know who she is kin to..she is mojo32 and her blog is entitled YELLOWDOG GRANNY IS MY MOTHER...brave kid..sooner and babs have welcomed her with open arms...she has already had to listen to me rave on about my "buds" here in bloggerville and tried to explain soonerville to her but could mentally picture her eyes glazing over..she's always had the ability to write"good" and expect her to have fun with this...but she does have a very full life...does more in one day than i do in a week...which is why i spend so much time with you all...(all ya'll).just so you will know what kind of mind you will be dealing with (other than she is my only daughter)..when we were living in calif we had a townhouse apt..2 beds, 2 baths upstairs..down stairs was bath,living room dinning room and large kitchen...we have always been a going to the movie family...and we had gone to see High Anxiety with mel brooks as he is one of my hero's..now if you havent seen the movie it is a spoof on all the hitchcock movies...and mel and some flunky are in this room and some one throws a rock thru the window...flunky says i got it...and reads the note...etc ....each time a rock gets thrown thru another window it gets bigger..and he always says "i got it" and picks it up ..by the time the last one is thrown it is a bolder the size of a washing machine.and he says I got it and is staining and grunting and carrying on..this is all thru the movie...so the next day after the boys have gone to school it is just mojo and I..im in kitchen fixing lunch she is in down stairs bathroom going to the bathroom and I hear in a strained voice.."I got it..."....."nope, I dont got it"..............
"i got it"......."nope, I dont got it"...this goes on for 3-4 minutes and then finally I hear "ahhhhh, I got it"...and could hear this splash....I fell in the floor laughing my ass off...she was 2 years old...funny kid even then...that's my girl..

ONE WEEK TIL WESTFEST ...HOT DAMN


this is westfest's 30th year of blash throwing for czech's..The event begins with the westfest preview party(which used to be the best street dance ever, fuckers)..beginning at 5:30pm Sept. 3rd.the miss westfest pagent set to begin at 7pm..this is where homegrown beer fed young ladies vie for the coveted crown..Rising country and western singer Pauline Reese of Temple, Texas will sing, followed by one of my favorite groups, the Austin-bsed, western swing band, Asleep at the Wheel. All of this takes place in the east tent..There is a children's area where the kids will be able to ride all the rides for $15, the price does not include the price of admission or the price of any games..(when it first started 30 years ago it was $1 to get in and think pevo(beer in czech) was $1 also..All military personnel will get discounted rates along with anyone over 65..(three more years to go for me)
The parade starts at 9am..and west fest opens at 11pm..the parade is really really big...lots of floats, cool old cars, kids on bikes, and assorted hot shot politicians going for the photo op..New for this westsfest is a tractor pull..trophies will be awarded to winners..there will be a traveling ag in the classroom program. it is a mobile exhibit to show kids grade 1 thru 6 how agriculture touches everday lives..(wow, how....dull) it will be a hands on exhibit that should appeal to city and country folk alike...(you betcha)also on the grounds are 32 booths of foods, hours of ethnic entertainment under the Cultural Amphitheater, over 70 arts and craft exhibitors, along with polka music and dancing under both the east and west tents..For the second year there will be a musical talent show. Other items for the festival include, an antique tractor display, karaoke and the return of the Mobile Dairy Classroom(gasp, the excitement of it all). There will be a Taroky tournament.Also volley ball and horse shoe contests.Ane dont forget the washer pitching contest too.and the high light of the festival is Brave Combo..grammy winning Brave Combo i should say...and since this is the 30 year anniversary there will be fireworks..Bishop Peter Esterka of Orange, Calif. is to celebrate the polka mass. Plus there is the kolache baking contest...so a fun time will be had by all.. the population of west is 2,268 normally..over the westfest weekend it will swell to over 30,000 people..i can hardly wait..which means everyone goes to the store and stocks up for 3 days as no one who is used to sitting at a stop sign and waiting for no more than 8-9 cars is going to want to sit at a stop sign and wait for 50 cars...fuck no...not me...nope no way..but then there is the humor factor of watching all them drunk czech's fall down and throw up on their shoes...cant wait.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

BE STILL MY HEART


Henrietta is filling empty egg shells with confetti for west fest and im helping her tend the library. some lady came in and got a bunch of audio tapes and had a janet ivanovich and i said you are going to love it, she is so funny and there is a grandma in there that will make you laugh out loud..she went back and checked out 2 more by janet..so felt like i had done my good job for the day..henrietta in a nice way(huh) reminded me that i was not suppposed to have an opinon about books. couldnt reccomend or show support for any one book. said that was ok cause i was a volunteer and it wasent a real job for me..she got that tight look around her mouth again and then smiled...heehee. i love making her do that thing with her mouth..heehee. any way.....the real story here is that we started talking about politics( i said i would never recommend political type books for fear of pissing everyone off as i was probably the only democrat in town) she said nope..that the town voted almost over whelmingly for kerry..i fell off my chair..i said what????? no way. these people are all right wing wing nuts for george bush..she said nope..check it out...i havent yet, because im afraid she was wrong and dont want to kill the buzz ihave going too soon...can you believe that..?? im going to go check it out..have been on line checking out joe don looney all morning...thanks to my son soonerboy i have been laughing my butt off all day..i love and miss joe don looney...hail the hero...

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

P. DIDDY

P. Diddy announced that he is to longer be called P. Diddy, that he was dropping the P. and only wanted to be called Diddy..I on the other hand will still call him by his first name..."du wa"..

STILL BORED ..STILL THINKING ABOUT WEIRD SHIT


my favorite football player was not that great of a football player..but he brought me more laughs than david letterman. his name was joe don looney. he played for so many different teams he may have set a record..most of the stories i read about him are from when he played for Detroit...they for some reason had a gym set up inside(this was in the 50's maybe or 60's) and they had one of those tension type machines where you would get down and ram it with your shoulder like you were going to hit someone..and it was spring loaded to hit you back like a real person..well, somehow they had the tension too tight and it was knocking people out, so they said dont mess with it till we get it fixed..looney said fuckit and got down jumped forward hit the machine and it knocked him out..totally..they took him off and said, really now..dont mess with it til we get it fixed. looney was not going to let some damn machine get the best of him. so later on after lights out the entire team could hear this sound over head of someone running...then a wham sound and then a thump and silence....then running again..the wham sound and then a thump...all night long...he never gave up..they finally had to take it away..he was also not very good at obeying orders and hating the thought of someone telling him when he had to be in bed for bed check...so was constantly sneaking out..once in a team meeting while watching films he got up handed the coach a sandwitch and said hold this for me and walked out and never came back...he got fired from so many teams..he adventually left football and then one day i saw a picture of him in people magazine with an elephant..cant remember the story but lots of people were pissed off. he died..and i miss him and his weird mind..

Monday, August 22, 2005

OK, I LIED ..IM BACK ALREADY..BUT HAVE GOSSIP

was checking out some books and henrietta asked me if i watched big brother on tv..and out of boredom i had been kinda watching it when the phone call bit comes on pbs..so i said yes..and she said the girl on their named april(blond) is from west...doh..how cool is that...ok, that's it...

HIRE THE HANDICAPPED, WE'RE FUN TO WATCH


I have been coming to this library at least 5 days a week for over 10 years...and just now discovered they have a scanner..fuck me...if i can figure out how to do it..i will be loading my blog up with pictures..want eveyone to see my beautiful daughter..she is sober 14 months and lost almost 60 lbs..she looks soo fine...but couldnt figure out what was really differnt about her..then i snapped..she looked like a woman...not just some pretty big tittied girl...so proud of her..she called last night and we talked for almost 2 hours..you cant belive the difference talking to her sober as it was talking to her drunk all the time..she has a fella who seems to be good for her and they are even talking about (way down the road) having a baby..she wants to have a baby..i freaked out..this is the kid from the time she could form a sentence said "i dont want to have kids"..and now she does..maybe i'll get that grandson yet...well, going to go home and make me some sun tea, lemon chicken, and have a bowl of boomer sooner surprise(with out the viagra sprinkles)..see ya'll tomorrow...

LOUIE PRIMA AND KEELEY SMITH


did anyone watch pbs this weekend...? had a special on louie prima and keely smith..had forgotten how much i liked them...she always cracked me up..and then as i was watching them...i went damn.....damn ...damn...
sonny and cher stole their act and added rock and roll..

i have a freckle on my right big toe, not the one with the lemon on it..it is exactly the size and color of a flea...over the years i have killed that freckle with a fly swatter about 83 times..but picture this...me sitting on recliner with lemon on one toe and criss cross marks on the other one..im looking at my feet and begin to giggle hysterically...i need to get a life...

JACKIESUE'S ICE CREAM PARLOR

i think we need an ice cream parlor at soonerville...with 69 flavors...my suggestion is "boomer sooners surprise"..its orange colored vanilla ice cream laced with maryjane and sprinkles of viagra on top...

JACKIESUE'S BORED...SO LOOK OUT...


I was reading Geek Love last night and got all twitchy and nervous and went on for about an hour before I realized that I was just fucking bored stupid..so I decided to see what I could get into..then I thought I know what....Im going to find Ronald McDonald Trump and kidnap him...take him to sooner's and get him drunk, shave his fucking head and buy him a pair of blue jeans, fucking the world tour by bush and crew tshirt, a pair of flip flops and give him a tattoo of a naked woman with I heart mom under it...maybe a skull with a snake coming out of one of his eyes..whatchathink???

LAWYER JOKES AND OTHER SHIT

How do you stop lawyers from drowning? you shoot them..what does a lawyer use for birth control?..his personalitywhat do you call 40 skydiving lawyers? skeet..what's the trouble with lawyer jokes.. lawyers dont think they are funny and no body else thinks they are jokes..rereading two of my favorite books this week..."Geek Love" by Kathern Dunnand "Even Cowgirls Get The Blues" by Tim Robbins...Geek Love is without a doubt the weirdest book ever...

ASHES GOING OUT WITH A BANG


"The ashes of iconoclastic journalist Hunter S. Thompson were to be fired out of 153-foot tower saturday evening in fron of a star-studded crowd at his Owl Farm compund in Colorado.The counerculture author killed himslef 6 moths ago at his home near Aspen.The tower was intentionally built just taller than the Statue of Liberty, and Mr.Thompson's wife, Anita said it was modeled after her the writer's "gonzo"logo:a clinched fist, made symmetrical with two thumbs, rising from the hilt of a dagger.The memorial was expected to be a party, with plenty of alcohol, reminiscences, readings from Mr. Thompson's works and performances by Lyle Lovett and the Nitty Gritty Dirt Band. About 250 people were invited, including Mr. Thompson's long time illustrator, Ralph Steadman, and actor Johnny Depp, a close friend who protaryed Mr. Thompson in the movie versionof the writer's Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas..."
by by old friend....reading about Duke in Doonsebury will never be the same again...

Saturday, August 20, 2005

SEE YA'LL MONDAY

HAVE TO HEAD OUT..LIBRARY IS CLOSING AND WONT HAVE COMPUTER ACCESS TILL MONDAY...HAVE A GOOD UN...LOVE AND KISSES..JACKIESUE...OLD VIKING QUEEN...

TELLING STORIES


all this talk of me playing pool made me remember my best game ever....and no one saw me make the eight ball..i was drunk in some bar in alberqurque new mexico and playing for money so i was dead serious..but dressed to kill...had on a see thru blouse(this was the 70's) with pockets that were supposed to cover my tata's...(no tits, tata's are tiny titties, tits are for my size) suppposed to cover my tits..but when i leaned over to shoot all bets were off..at least as far as my tits were concerned...any how..i was playing for $50 and had ran the table and had snookered myself on the 8 ball...it was all the way down at the end of the table, almost dead center of the table.surrounded by the other players balls...story of my life..so i walked around the table and looked at the shot from every angle...and had garnered quite a crowd. me being stupid of course thought they were drawn by my exceptional skill on the table..finally i called the left hand rear pocket..leaned over and slid that cue ball between 2 balls, clipped the eight and it cruised right into the pocket...i mean it was a hell of a shot...i looked up to see the looks on everyone's face..you know the one where they all are standing in awe of my magical playing abilities??? yeah, right..they were all still looking at my tits..not one of them saw the shot..one guy walked up to me and said "i saw the shot and it was terrific".. i said"how come you saw it and no one else did"? and he smiled and said "im gay"...

KINKY IS WALTZING ACROSS TEXAS...RAISING MONEY


blowing smoke everywhere but up your ass, kinky is out there stomping stumps for his run for governor...he preaches ecumeism ("may the god of your choice bless you"), pay raises for teachers and firefighters.he says he will sign anything but bad legislation..
he still needs to collect 45,000 signitures to get on the Nov. ballot..where can i sign up..he has only raised $60,000 so far, but he is offering kinky friedman talking action figures signed by him..."we'll do bobbleheads.We'll do Willie concerts. We're going to do every possible unconventional thing we can to turn kinky's popularity to cash," said Mr. Barkley.this is the same guy who put jesse ventura in the governor's mansion in minn.
well, we can only hope...anything is better than "good hair perry"...

IF YOU DON'T WANT BUTTER, YOU GOTTA PULL THE DASHER OUT IN TIME...


and other words to the wise...
"years ago, fairy tales all began with,'once upon a time', not we know they all begin with.'if i'm elected.'....fuckers
"time is a great healer, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils"...hector berloig
"the secret of staying houng is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age." lucille ball.


THE SUV BOB BOUGHT
RE: THE BATTLE OVER SUV'S DRIVES ON BY FROMA HARROP, VIEWPOINTS, DEC.19TH
This is the suv that Bob bought.
This is the gas station that sold the gas to Bob to put in his suv.
This is the ooil refinery that made the gas, to sell to the gas station, that sold the gas to bob, to put in his suv..
This is the Middle east oil-producing nation, that sold the ooil to the oil refinery, that made the gast to sell to the gas station, to see to Bob, to put in his suv.
These are the terrorists, who got the money from the Middle EAst oil-producing nation, hat sold the oil to the oil refinery, that made the gas to see to the gas staion, that sold the gas to Bob, to put in his suv.
These are the over2,800 people who were killed by the terrorists, who got the money from the Middle East oil-producing nation, that sold the oil to the oil refinery, that sold the gas to the gas station, that sold the gas to Bob, to put in his suv..

i remember when i was a kid and my folks would tell me how much they gave up for the war..food rations, gas ration,no nylons, no sugar and coffee. but no one thought one thing about it as they were doing it for the war effort..they gave money to buy bonds, etc..here we have a war where people instead of giving up things for the war effort, run out and buy suvs the size of an elephant and uses more gas that 2 other cars and then bitches about the war...fuck me...i'll never smile again...

Thursday, August 18, 2005

WEST NEWS....


saint mary's is building a parish center...they had a mass there and everything...going to have4 class rooms, a meeting room , a 150 seat cafeteria, a 1,588 square foot kitchen, a small concession stand and a regulation size gymnasium, which will be a multi=purpose facility which can also be used to seat 512 people with table and chairs on the gym floor..roll out bleachers in the gum will seat 650 fans..also boys and girls locker rooms and restrooms...cost.??$2.2 million and just over $1 million has been raised...
we are also in the process of buildign an assisted living center. more news on that one later..
greg nors is the new postmaster ..he is the one that agreed that i should just kick the new neighbors ass and get a pos box..i like him..but since all this happened so far the new neighbors have just been nice and nice can be..maybe someone told them i was nuts and to kiss up to me as much as possible...hm...the catholic daughters are having a bake sale to raise money.the west rodeo was a huge success...we have had one birth, one death this week..one engagement and one anniversary..the guy that died is younger than me and that always makes me nervous...i forgot all about the rodeo and missed the parade..damn, wanted to see if the drunk cowboys would stick to the trail they had laid out for them and if any fell off their horses...
paper is full of classes of kindergardeners...they all look so sweet..most classes are about 15-19..guess that isnt too many..three different classes are having reunion...1965, 1980 and 1990..entries for bicycles for the west parade..our little parade is really a pretty big deal..we usually have some republican big wig that rides in the lead car..they all throw out candy to the kids...i may throw rocks this year..my patience is wearing thin...
same ole same ole...nothing changes much in west..they did do some rebuilding on the hard ware store and the lumber company...lots of competion between those two business's..hardware put in a small lumber shop and the lumber company put in a garden shop...i expect them to meet at noon by the gazebo and draw down on each other any day now...
if i dont go to the reunion i will go to the west fest and take pictures..think sooner scan he would put them in for me..and going to get him to do some now too...

ARISTICRATS


I dont know if anyone has been following this in the news, but there is a documentary type movie where all these wonderful commedians tell the same joke that has the same beginning and ending, but they change the middle...it is supposed to be some of the rankest, dirtiest, nastiest joke ever told and each teller is ickier than the last...the beginning is a guy or girl goes into a talent agent's office and says he has this fantastic new act..it uses all of his family, wife husband, son, daughter, grand parents and the dog..(or cat etc.) and the guy says that is fantastic, we can always use a new family act..and then the joke is :what ever you want it to be...they can do anything and everything to make the middle of the joke..then after you finish the ending is and the talent guy says and what is the name of this goup and the person says:the aristicrats....
i want to see this movie in the worse way..there is no rating..the guy who put it together said enough warning has been sent out that they should know what they are getting into if they see the movie...so what im doing is challenging my fellow bloggers to a contest...who can tell the best joke using that or a better beginning and that ending...a??/ i personally think sooner would win this one hands down or maybe danny....im going to think and think and figure out my middle of the joke...but any one up for the challenge/???????
i think it would be lots of fun...and maybe we can make the aristicrats part 2 movie...ha...let me know....who is up for the first one???

BUSH IS PLAYING HIDE THE WEENIE

yes, he is ...and we on the side of good and fair justice know he's fucking us even if we don't see the dick...and the right wing wing nuts see the dick and think it is a cute little toy...

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

WEST FEST.........


It is soo cool to drive down the little streets of west by god texas this time of year..all the telephone poles have czech flags or west fest signs on them...we have the big banner across the street when you first drive down oak stree(main street)..announces that west fest is coming and the date..since i havent heard anything about the reunion i may actually stay here and go to it this year..especially friday night, just to hear asleep at the wheel..saw them at antone's in austin years ago and would like to see them again..plus brave combo is playing again...they have played every year since the first one and they are a trip...and i have a brave combo tshirt that i can wear...
my favorite time of year here in west is a toss up between holloween and christmas...holloween all the houses are decorated and each year they do more to go all out for decorations and give out great candy..think west has the best candy give away any where...plus they have a big candy give away at the volunteer fire station and another one at city hall...but christmas is so cool .all the business have strings of clear lights across the tops of the buildings and they link up all across town..all the poles are decorated with wreaths..there are decorated trees in the windows of the 2 banks, blow up santa''s on top of the tiger shop..and there are so many beautifully decorated houses all over town that you can go out on an evening and drive up and down the streets and see house after house decororated for christmas. even the poorest looking house has a tree in the window and lights on the porch...only thing that i dont like is they start right after thanksgiving ...and some before..i used to have my little house decorated in chili peppers every year..but they finally croaked and i sent the chili pepper covers to my daugher in san francisco..so west does it up good for christmas...wish you were here to see it...
oops, have to run..henrietta just remember she has a kiwana's meeting and im in charge...see ya'll later.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

JESUS WAS A BAYLOR BEAR


"Jesus was a Baylor bear but Jesus wouldn't cut his hair.
His helmet didn't fit, but he didn't give a shit.
'Cause Jesus was a Balor bear...."by willie nelson..

oppurtunity is missed by most people because it is dressd in overalls and looks like work...

we often give our enemies the means for our own destruction....

Only two things are infinite, the universe, and human stupidity, and I''m not sure about the foremer..albert einstein..

man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them...samuel butler

Sam Houston once said:"Texas can make it without the United States, but the United States cannot make it without Texas."

"I have a theory that the truth is never told during the 9-5 hours"...hunter s thompson...

"I you are playing a poker game and you look around the table and can''t tell who the sucker is.......it's
you."Paul Newman

"there is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore looking like an idiot"..steven wright...

TEXAS
LISTEN TO MY SONG AND IF YOU WANT TO SING ALONG
IT''S ABOUT WHERE I BELONG....TEXAS
SOMETIMES FAR INTO THE NIGHT AND UNTIL THE MORNING LIGHT
I PRAY WITH ALL MY MIGHT TO BE IN TEXAS
IT''S WHERE I WANT TO BE IT''S THE ONLY PLACE FOR ME
WHERE MY SPIRIT CAN BE FREE.....TEXAS...
WILLIE NELSON

In 2002 hunter s thompson said:" A civilian gang of thieving lobbiest for the military industrial complex is running the white house. If to be against them is considered unpatriotic..hell, then call me a traitor..
betchaass sweety..

NEW HORSE IN THE GOVERNOR'S RACE


Mr. Bell is running against "good hair" perry...as a democrat...still dont know if i will vote for kinky as he is running as a indepenent and would have to miss primary vote just to vote for him...but this new guy has made some great statements about "good hair"..like..."Rick Perry couldn''t lead a silent prayer."..now I like that one...plus he said:"I am sick and tired of Texas being the national headquarters of the Thank God for Mississippi committee."cause if it wasen''t for Mississippi we would be 50 in all the lists of the worse in insurance, health benefits, etc...and it is sooo true...went Annie got in office Texas was knee deep in dept...when she left office we were not only out of dept but were way ahead of where we had been in years...now we dont have a pot to piss in nor a window to throw it out of....

50 CENT CAN KISS MY ASS.


was an article in the paper and when I got thru reading it I was ready to kick some serious ass...here tis'...
50 cent credits his drug dealing past with helping him become a superstar rapper..because he used the same methods to get people hooked on his music as he did to encourage people to but his illegal substances. The son of a drug dealing mother who was murdered when he was 8, 50 cent real name curtis jackson was selling drugs by the time he was 11, he says. The "candy shop" star garnered a collection of layal hip-hop fans by giving away free sample of his music, just like he did as a peddler of crack cocaine. He admits in his neew autobiography, From peices to weight: one upon a time in southside queens, "I'd use marketing, like giving free samples to potential addicts. The same trick I used to get my music off the ground."

well, fuck me...
im so pissed I don't know if I should spit or go blind...what a fucking nerve that little bastard has...im calling my granddaughers this evening and if they own one cd by him im telling them this little story and if they don''t throw them away im going to their house and do it my self...judas priest...what is the world coming to..?????????????????????

FOUND THE PERFECT GODDESS TO WORSHIP


I was bored sat night after the "football game"..and started reading a book I have had for about 10 years..its called an introduction to viking mythology...and since when I was tracing my family roots into our Irish history I found out that we aren't Irish..we're vikings..the roycroft's came over to england some time in the 400's...we were raping and pilliaging but one of my long ago kinfolk decided that he liked it there and fought for some duke...stayed there for a long time and then they started having relgious wars and we got tossed out of england into Ireland...and after awhile we pissed enough people off that they tossed us out of Ireland too..some went to australia, some went to canada and some came to texas...any how I figured if we started out as vikings I could probably find a nice viking goddess to worship...and I did..her name is Freya...she is the goddess of sex...Her chariot was pulled by either her boar Hildisvini or by a number of cats. She owned a falcon coat which she could use to fly around the world in the guise of that bird..Horses were involved with her cult, for reasons, it appears, of orgiastic sex. Besides her role in terms of sex and beauty she had a somewhat grimmer aspect, because she often led parties of Valkyries down to fetch the dead from battlebields, bringing them back to her hall so that they could enjoy all the benefits of the afterlife.
(im doing this in two parts as i have deleted it once already as Im trying to copy it out of book and book is huge)

QUICK AND EASY SUMMER TREAT

Take a large bowl and large spoon and put it in the frezer...freeze for about 5-6 hours..then take them out of freezer and fill with ice cream....eat with the cold spoon...if you have a little extra time you can cover the bowl of ice cream with a huge slab of pecan pie...use fork on pie

Monday, August 15, 2005

DEJAVU ALL FUCKING OVER AGAIN


I was sitting here staring at the computer trying to figure out why I am in such a pissy mood...cause believe it or not..Im a happy good natured fat lady...and usually take things in stride, even the assholes out in Crawford...but I am in a pissy mood..and why I ask myself...why am I in a pissy mood...and then fuck, I remembered...the cowboys lost saturday night...it was just like last season...except different players...different qb...but still an old fart for a qb...I was so pissed saturday that it went all the way into sunday and here it is monday and Im still pissed..fuck me I'll never smile again..them cowboys had 12.......fucking pentalties....kiss my ass..the offense sucked...good thing they werent playing indoors cause they would have sucked all the air out of the stadium...romo actually looked like he might be able to play qb...but not sure about that..just waiting for the redshirted freshman at texas tech...henson...i think is his name...hopefully we can keep it together till he graduates and we can draft him...you hear that jerry asshole jones???
what really pisses me off is I had such good expetations...I even went to the store and bought a 12 pack of old mill na beer... and no tomato juice..was going to sit back and drink my pussy beer and enjoy the cowboys..what a waste of $6...could have bought a 6-pk of dublin dr.pepper and been better off...fuck..piss...shit...football...it kills me every year...but as pissed as I get...I still love them sonsabitches...they may be some no playing football players, but their my no playing football players...going to go home and make obscene phone calls to the West Rest Home...make some old farts day....

LAWS....BY THE GODDESS


ther will be no discrimanation against anyone for any reason what so fucking ever..women will get the same pay as men ...if they both have worked the same amt of time at the job the pay should be the same..no one should get less pay just because they werent born with a dick..marrying one should be enough..
we will steal the insurance plan of the canadians...free insurance for anyone who cannot afford it..people in prison will not get free dental work, free operations..they will earn money from working on the chain gang...and can pay for their dental work from that fund..everytime i read about some guy doing time for rape or murder or assault what ever and he is in prison where if he gets a cavity he gets free dental..well, fuck that shit..he works on the chain gang or he gets a fucking tooth ache like the rest of poor americans..
we will have free perscriptions.. there will be no private rooms in hospitals..there will be wards...were everyone gets the same treatment... and if anyone gets plastic surgery they have to pay for the surgery for any child that needs facial construction..
and every person that voted for bush gets to have their asses wacked by a two by four and that is just for starters...think everyone that voted for bush should be made to join the army and serve in iraq, afghanastan,iran, and any other place that might get their asses shot at....see how much they like the war then....
man, im really on a tear today...reading the paper and listening to the news just makes me nuts some days..and then to top it off, some yokle out in crawford to insure that the rest of the country knows that we are inbred, ignorant assholes, takes a pot shot up in the air to show he can..."cause by god, this is texas and we all have guns and can shoot them any time we want to."..jackass...fuck this im going to go look for sooner..cant trust them fucking rangers to find their asses with both hands...i'll find him and bring his monkey fucking ass back to denise so so she can get her child support...and while im at it i think i will take a detour out to crawford and see what kind of stink i can stir up....

NON SEQUITUR BY WILEY

"i pledge allegiance to the flag of the corporate states of america. and to the republicans for which it stands, one nation under debt, easily divisible, with liberty and justice for oil."another of my favorite comics.

THE BOONDOCKS BY AARON MCGRUDER

one kid to the other kid...."bush got recored admitting that he smoked weed....." other kid:"maybe he smoked it to take the edge off the coke."...i love this comic....

BECAUSE I LOVE YOU...YOU CIGARETTE SMOKING YAHOO'S


According to the u.s. surgeon general, this is what happens after your last cigarette:
20 minutes: your blood pressure drops
8 hours: the carbon monoxide level in your blood drops back to normal.
24 hours: your chance of a heart attack decreases.
2 weeks to 3months: your circulation improves and lung fuction increases.
1- 9 months: your coughing, sinus congestion, fatigue and shorness of breath decrease.
1 year: your added risk of heart disease is half that of a smoker.
5-15 years: your stroke risk is reduced to that of a nonsmoker.
10 years: your lung cancer death rate is about half that of a smoker
15 years: your risk of heart disease is back to that of a non-smoker...



stop now...please...

Saturday, August 13, 2005

I CANT GET OVER YOU...SO GET UP AND ANSWER THE PHONE YOURSELF


well, the texas rangers just checked in with me..they are out looking for sooner..they went to the naked dancers club in waco posing as baptist to look for him..the irs guy is still there. He is drunk and going up to the dancers telling them he will audit them unless they give up sooner...the rangers seem to think he is hiding out in mexico with a bunch of oral roberts college rejects...said he was in a cantina wearing nothing but a jock strap and a dead monkey hat...im heading out in my truck to see if i can find and bring him home before he gets into real trouble..see you monday..

Thursday, August 11, 2005

MY FIRST LAW TO BE PASSED IS.....

FREE ICECREAM...AND DOUBLE SCOOPS FOR ALL DOGGIES....DOUBLE SCOOPS WITH BEEF JERKY ON TOP...

OLD FARTS NEVER DIE, WE JUST SMELL LIKE IT


i am trying to start each bog out now with a one of a kind headline...some i will make up and some i will steal...
i have been reading all of your posts and you know what? i like you guys..i really do...some more than others but hey cant have everthing...but basically all the ones that i read i get the feeling that if we hung out we would be buds...some i know that it is better to keep a computer between us...i dont mean that we would be "best" buds like blood brother friends like in the eighth grade, but real buds...go to movie with each other, go out to dinner, talk on the phone, and not have to lie when we didnt want to do any of the above..just say, nah, i dont feel up to it, or im not in the mood...i have to admit that other than my kinfolk michael and old buddy danny my 4 favorites are sooner, babs, blood dreamz and ruby rocks... not in any order...well, maybe sooner..
sooner im going to adopt...since neither one of us could keep a straight face to have sex..ha...besides i would like to be hannabanna''s auntgrandma..
library is closed tomorrow and hard to get here on a sat and with david's computer off it will not be til monday til you hear from me again...i will miss you all..have a great weekend...see ya'll monday...jac

MY FIRST ORDER OF BUSINESS AS PRESIDENT OF THE USA..IS...


Iam changing the name of president to Goddess In Training, american branch...the second thing I will do is fire all the supreme court judges...and make it impossible for the next president to be able to choose any...no person has the right to choose someone for a job that will last for a life time when his job only lasts maybe 4 years...too much power for one person for such a short time..so all the new supreme court judges will be hired, based on a series of test given by a panel of hand picked teachers of american history..they will have to have been a judge at one point in their lives and have to know the laws of the land..and will not be able to depend on those little law clerks that have their own agenda..for a start..then I am changing the laws about guests from another country..each person coming to this country must have valid ID and will be checked out by a special group that will check all back ground on each person entering the usa..then if they pass the back ground check which will be very thorough...each visitor has to pay an entry fee of $500. when they leave all but $100 will be returned...that money will go into a school tax..for all low income schools..
we will have free medical for low income family's.
and now to my favorite new law..people that play professional sports will have a cap on the amt of money they can make...the longer they play the more they make...bonus''s payed by the owners can not go more than $1,000,000. and for each bonus paid an equal amt will be paid into a trust fund for the player.they can get bonus for special plays, most td's etc. but for what they earn they get same amt in a trust fund..
movie stars will no longer be able to earn $40 million a movie...the movie will be made and depending on what it makes at the box office is what everyone on the movie will get paid...and a percentage of money will go into a special fund for the homeless...
and speaking of the homeless..I will bring back the chain gang system in the prisons...they will build homes for the homeless. There will be no jail sentences for small drug arrests..like possession of any drug for the first offense...there will be rehab and schools to teach them new skills so they can get a job and not sell drugs for an income..possession of marijuana will depend on the person..if they dont have a high school diploma then their punishment is to go back to school and get it...if they have diploma then their punishment is to go to school and take some sort of college class. determinded by their ability...maybe if they are smart but made wrong choices they can go back to school to be a teacher...oh, teachers..teachers, cops, firemen will get paid $1,000,000 a year. cops and firemen will have the best insurance and retirement fund known to man kind...and there will be better training for the police..they will have to have lots of sensetivity classes and be able to speak 2 languages.. ok, that's just for a start....but I will have lots more on the politicians that are in office right now...im firing them suns a bitches...and they will get a pay cut...big time...and some may just go to jail...and that list is really long....well, what do you think so far?

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

I ACCEPT THE NOMINATION AND WILL BE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES...

Thank you blooddreamz...I will gladly be the President...I will go home and ponder, muse and come up with some rules of the nation that will make this a better place..Of course when its as fucked up as it is right now..shouldn't take much...so I will go forth and come back tomorrow with a working plan...My first plan is to make them red states pay out the ass....

DEATH CEREMONIES...SUCK


In case anyone is around when I croak, please, no viewing, no service, no coffin..chuck my ass in the burner and keep my ashes in a kfc bucket till its spring time, find a patch of blue bonnets away from regular traffic and toss me out the window as you drive by...dont even stop...went to the funeral home and yup, he''s dead..why in the world do people have an open coffin so they can take a gander at the dead? who thought of that fucking idea..."hey, when they die, lets stick them in a box, keep the lid up and let every one walk by and make sure he is still dead.."poor Patsy she looked like she was doped up to the gills. I told her that if she wanted to go get drunk to call me that i would be her driver..she could get drunk, cry, cuss or do what ever made her happy and I would kick anyone''s ass that she wanted me too. also would commit any crime for her that would get me up to 7 years time but anything over that she was on her own...she cracked up laughing and said"thank God for you, eveyone else has been treating me like im going to break and I didnt know how much I needed to laugh til you got here."..so my good deed done I kissed everyone and hauled ass back to watch the monday night game...but so stressed out by all these deaths I fell asleep before the game was over..still dont know who won...
I did run into some people I haven't seen in years...one couple used to own the bar I used to hang out in.."strickly country"..yup that's the real name of it..I told them I had seen their daughter and we didnt recognize each other and the mother said she should have remembered you, when she was seperated from her husband you took her out and got her drunk...and told her you would help her find a new one..now I wonder why I dont remember that...told them I hadn't drank in over 12 years and thought there was going to be another funeral for them...they were stunned...you have to remember this is the guy who every time he bought a new pair of cowboy boots he would thank me for them...as it was my money i spent in the bar that helped buy them...asshole..
well, it finally quit raining..place looks like a swamp...my yard especially...but was nice while it lasted..now its back up in the 90's...
oh, does anyone know anything about computers? the one I use at david's wont hook up to the internet..little button at the bottom says something is unconnected from the firewall..we checked all the lines, but so far nada...help?????

Monday, August 08, 2005

THE NEWS IN WEST FOR THIS WEEK


The owner of the chevy dealership here in west is building a hotel...supposed to open feb.1st 2006...70 rooms, 2 meeting rooms, a workshop facility, an outdoor swimming pool, a gift shop, dry sauna and a facility available with computers and internet connections for guest use...hot damn....pretty cool...and of course it is going to be called the Czech inn...and a sonic is supposed to be coming too...we are getting so big time...
West Rodeo is a week away..and still are taking applications for mutton busters...
Deiterman-Berger's are having a family reunion...1990 grads are having a high school reunion...one engagement, 3 births, 6 deaths..one of them a friend of mine..and to top off that peice of news. Patsy, that does the bookkeeping at the community grocery, husband died..david ...I have known him for almost 30 years and Patsy for about 25...he has been ill for some time with liver cancer and finally just gave out...the viewing is tonight and that is wher I should be, but to be honest, I am stalling for time...just hate these damn things...
Local cub scouts earn religious awards...now this I dont understand...do they get these for doing "christian acts".?? or being a christian cub scout..? which is what...man, crap like this makes me want to bang my head again..
West ATDS wn the freshman girls state championship...why are they called freshmen girls...shouldnt it be freshpeople girls??? hmmm
well, im all a twitter..asleep at the wheel is going ot be playing friday night of west fest weekend...i love asleep at the wheel..plus brave combo is going to play again too. they have played every year since we have had west fest...if you dont know about brave combo, you havent lived..they win polka grammy's every year...and until you have heard them play smoke on the water..you havent lived...only they could do a polka version of jimmy hindrix... years ago west fest was only sat and sunday and friday night was street dance night..everyone would get a cooler full of beer, soda etc and wander down to the middle of town right in front of the bank by the rr tracks...then the little stores decided to stay open and we could wonder all over town meeting and greeting, dancing to the street bands, drinking beer and having a great time...the city finally figured out there was a lot of money being made and they should have some of it so they made it illegal to have the street party..said they were worried about someone getting ran over by a train...assholes, just ruined it for all of us...so now west fest is friday, saturday and sunday... I usually just stock up on groceries and hide out or go to family reunion...as the population of west goes from 1,900 to any where from 30,000 to 45,000... and town is bumper to bumper with drunk czech's...well, I have stalled long enough...need to go make an appearance at the viewing....by from west by god texas

FOOTBALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL


yes, it has started..only preseason but its here...have started my football book for the year. every since '87 I have kept a football book. it contains the weeks games with point spread where i pick and bet sometimes with a "friend" or sometimes with another type friend and I have done pretty good over the years... the book contains wins, loses, points for, points agains, percentages, at home away from home for both teams playing..on grass, weather conditions, etc...plus as the year goes on I will copy down things that I might have found interesting. lines from books, movies, head lines. predictions for super bowl...random poems, etc. I don''t know what anyone will do with them when I croak. make a good fire I guess..there are wine stains on the pages, beer stains, scribbles from the granddaughters, notes I wrote to myself about game, players, etc...weird, have been doing it for so long..kind of a football blog...

ANOTHER LESSON LEARNED FROM SUNDAY COMICS

"freedom, democracy and human rights"....
these are some of the words that Chinese internet users aren''t allowed to use...and you know what is worse????? microsoft has agreed to help the chinese government censor its people by blocking such words from their internet searches..yahoo and google are doing the same sort of things...
"integrity"...is a word that microsoft, yahoo and google are apparently unacquainted with...."..from mallard fillmore by bruce tinsley....


these people would fuck a snake if it brought in new money...

COWBOY JUNKIES SONG LYRIC....

"Rather smoke, and listen to coltrane, than go through all that shit again."
truer words never spoken..
or another favorite....
"The first time the devil made me do it/ the second time I done it on my own."...billy joe shaver...

COWBOY JUNKIES SONG LYRIC....

"Rather smoke, and listen to coltrane, than go through all that shit again."
truer words never spoken..
or another favorite....
"The first time the devil made me do it/ the second time I done it on my own."...billy joe shaver...

NO IM NOT AT THE RANCH


I think my name is on an alert list and if I get to close they are understrict orders to throw my ass under the jail...but if the rain ever stops and she is still out at the "ranch"...in the next day or two, I might drive my pickemup truck out there and see if I can stir up a little trouble..I have a friend who has said he will make me up some signs. Im thinking "fuck you, you forest gump asshole"...just wonder how much I can get away with before they arrest or shoot me...
havent been on since sat. and have so much to go on and on about...
the first is a poll I found in the dallas am paper..about forest being arogant and dishonest..
50% of people who say he is not honest. 48% who say he is...yeah, right..down from 53% in Jan
Mr. Bush''s overal job approval is 42% and 55 % disapproving...
56% is the number who viw the presiden's condifence ias arrogance, up from 49% in Jan.38% approval ranting on handing Iraq...so at least we can see the tide is turning...but what really really makes me want to butt my head on the wall, is the death of all those soldiers from Ohio. these parents are the same ones that voted for him because they were afraid that if they voted for Kerry he would allow gays to marry...Well, now your sons are dead because you went with Bush...What I am thinking is just to ugly and mean to say...but there is the possiblility that maybe there sons would have been safe at home if they had been less worried about gay marriages and more conserned about the illegal war in Iraq..we have lost almost 2,000 men and women in a war that was started on a lie and led by a man who's ego has no bounds...

Thursday, August 04, 2005

JAMES LEE BURKE


just finished his new book and man oh man...was it ever good..when i get a really good book i usually do one of two things..i either read it straight through with only peepee breaks or i will read a chapter and then put it down and then read another chapter. some books i cant put down and then others i dont want to finish it cause its so good you dont want it to end...one is not better than the other, just each type book brings it out into me...this one of james lee''s was a didnt want to put down cause i didnt want it to end...mainly cause this is the first dave and clete book in a while and i missed them so much..espeically clete as i have the hots for him...eveyone needs a friend like clete...
so im letting everyone that reads me..if you are a book lover...and love to read like i do...you have to read the latest james lee burke book...actually read any of his books...he does good writting.I can still smell the salt in the air and the hear the flight of the two brown pelicans...you go james...

THE GODDESS STILL LOVES ME


was up late last night, actually early this moring when I got an email from the goddess. she just wanted to reasssure me that things would work out..that she knows that I have been a little upset with the goings on of the world and all the misdeeds of one of her children...and we are all children of the goddess...so she wanted to let me know that in just a short time she was going to make sure that one of her children who has gone astray and his sins have cost the lives of many many of her other children is going to be aptly punished...she said that something would happen and once it happened everyone would know that it was the direct result of the wrath of the goddess and would teach the followers of the bad child not to mess with the goddess...
I for one am hoping it will be one of those straw bolts of lightning that are flashing around the texas country side...but we shall see....

THE DEVIL MADE ME DO IT


I have been listening to the religious right and they might have a point...so from here on out when I speak shit about forest gump,the republicans,eagles and their fans, and anything else I happen to speak shit about....well, the devil made me do it...not my fault...can't hold me responsible...I was unduely influenced by the devils way.I was tempted, lured and actucally once I was drugged by the devil and made to say mean and cruel things about my daughterinlaw.
So...Iam going to run down to the local christian church, run up to the pulpit, throw myself down on the floor, confess my sins, ask for the help of Jesus and be born again...amen..hallelujah,hate the sin and not the sinner, turn the other cheek, and rid my body of all my past sins...for I am born again........
well, Im waiting......still waiting...hm.....well, fuck..didnt take..im still the mean ole ass pagan I have always been...

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

ITS RAINING IN WEST, BY GOD, TEXAS


and ain't it a wonderful thing...smells sooo good. felt good too. left the window on the truck down and was going to run out and roll it up, but felt so good, I walked slowly to the truck...
Im at the library where I have been book readers jackpot..new J. A. Jance book. (not spanking new, but new to me)Improbable Cause...about J.P. Beaumont...like him and Sherriff Brady in the other series she does..then I got the new James Patterson Lifeguard...and the best of allllllll. the new James Lee Burke book Crusader's Cross. a new Dave Robicheaux novel...im so happy I could sing...but since I sound like a gravely version of gabby hayes, I will refrain.
and while I was checking them out Henrietta says to me"I can't belive you were so nice to the post master the other day."....(doh...????) and said, "why wouldn't I?" she said, "well, I knew you were upset cause they were talking about moving your mailbox.". "yes, but it wasen't his fault, he is just doing his job, it is the new neighbor that has cause to worry about the state of her ass"...she got that pinched little purse around her mouth that she gets when I step out of line in the library..."OH", she said...there are few things in life that give me more joy than making her do that little thing with her mouth...which is why every chance I get I mention the goddess, my hatred of forest gump, and that the pope is a nazi..that one really gets to her...heehee..life is good..
what really makes life good...is foot ball season is coming up...I can smell lether and hear the sound of bodies smacking against each other all the way from oxnard, calif.which incidentally is my favorite city in calif...well, not the city but the name..I just love to say oxnard...when I lived in Calif. I would make up sentences with the city oxnard in it...like there is a great mall in oxnard...its on the corner of yadda yadda and oxnard blvd. I know it is weird..but it made me happy...oh, go to hell, and while your at it...go to oxnard...life is good.
You will notice the difference in my blogs once football season is here...I will be consumed with all things Cowboys...and no I don't want to root for teams like the Seahawks, who have never won a Super Bowl..and get it straight right now...I have no use whatsoever for the eagles or the city from which they sprung or the state where it resides..they are scum and should die...I don''t feel this way about other teams, I love the Raiders, the Texans, Cleveland, and because of my love for my friend Mary, the Bronco''s..I don''t like the redskins, Miami, or San FRancisoco. they suck...its a division thing...But I love my Cowboys...I loved them win they were winners, I loved them when they were losers..I loved them with good coaches and stupid ones..(yes, sooner you know which one I speak of)I loved them when they were fucking 'ho's and doing drugs...I didn''t love the ones fucking up, but I loved the team..I miss Landry, Bill Bates and Nate Newton before he became stupid and decided to sell drugs as a way to pay his child support...stupid asshole...named my pitbull after him...nate..now he''s in a prison in ark...stupid asshole...anyhow, I love my boys...thru thick and thin and all the inbetween, they are my team...not one of those good time fans...Im a all the time fan...I will cuss them, beat my head on the wall and cry like a baby when they lose...but they are still my boys...I am thinking about having "wait til next year" tattooed on my ass...hopefully this will be the year...parcels...don't fail me now....

Monday, August 01, 2005

PLAYING LIBRARIAN AGAIN..SUCH FUN


I love it...all these kids come in for community service..and I get to play boss and crack the whip..they are dusting and cleaning all the glass again...henrietta makes them clean the toilets and I just cant tell someone to go clean the crapper...every time I click on to soooner's blog the musci starts playing and freaks everyone in library out, including me...

"There was much or the beautiful, much of the wanton, much of he bizarre, something of the terrible, and not a little of that which mihgt have excited disqust."..edgar allen poe.

I liked that, from the masque of the red death...

a gallup poll shows that president forest gump's approval rating is down from 49percent to 44percent...should be just 44 people...not percent

crap..there is no one here but me...only have an hour to go..
rocky came back and is pickier about his food now more than ever...if he only eats half a cat of something and i put it in refer and then try and give it to him again, he wont eat it...wont eat anything cold...little fucker...he wants either tuna fish or salmon..got him a can of makerel and wouldnt eat it..fussy little fucker..but he is spending more time at home, so the females must all be pregnant..he hasent been in a fight in a couple of weeks...I need to get him fixed, but want someone in the house to get some..

took grandaughter to her dentist in hewitt. which is about 35 minutes from west...and havent been out there in about 4 years or so and got lost. told jamie, im either having a old farts moment where i am mentally lost or we''re fucking lost...she said grandma. we're lost..i said why didnt you say anything? she said. we're going to the dentist grandma.im in no hurry..on the way back i stopped at dairy queen and got ice cream cone and she got banana split blizzard. then we came home and got fajitas from the tiger shop. which is a gas station with a little cafe in it...make good mexican food..but i make better..im still waiting for the neighbor to confront me about the mailbox. actually tomorrow is the day the garbage is picked up and waiting for her to go thru the yard...now ...where is my pit bull dog when i need him...going to go check out some books...so far i have averaged 28 books a month...not bad...

THE CITY OF DENVER CAN KISS MY ASS


Another article in dallas morning news sunday...Denver is in a panic over pit bulls and now it is illegal to own a pit in the city limits and if you have one, they will come pick it up and put it down...they are taking dogs away from their familys no matter what the history of the dog is and killing them. only way you can save them is to either move outside of the city limits or move the dog outside of the city limits...Since may more than 389 dogs have been impounded and at least 260 destroyed..destroyed my redneck ass..they murdered those dogs...
dog owners are in a panic and are using an underground railroad of sorts, sending their pets to live elsewhere or hiding them from authorities. Denver, Miami, Cincinnati all have a ban on pit bulls.Judas fucking priest..these people make me nuts..to the side of the article is a side bar that says Pit bull facts..how dangerous are pit bulls???
Temperment:The American Temperament testing society evaluated 122 dog breeds and found that the American Staffordshire Terrier, a type of pit bull banned in Denver, passed its ealuations 83.3 percent of the time, just behind the golden retriever at 83.6 percent. Bite fatalities: The American Canine Foundation calculated rates of human dog-bite fatalities by breed, and it found that pit bulls bite at a lower rate than many other dogs. The Doberman pinscher was found to bite 10 times as often as a pit bull. Another study concluded that fatal attacks"represent a small proportion of dog bite injuries to humans, and therefore, should not be the primary factor driving public policy concerning dangerous dogs."
Most deaths" Pit bulls and Rottweilers have caused the most deaths, according to a study by the Centers for Disease Control Prevention, the American Veterinary Medical Ass. and the Humane Society of the United States;which examined 20 years of dog-bite data.Julie Gilchrist, a cdc doctor said many factors go into biting risk, including the health of the dog and how the animal was raised...


sooooooo stupid people..its not the dog, it is the fucking owner....I have had pits since 1971 and never had one of my dogs bite anyone...lick them til they weep maybe but never bit anyone..Nate weighted 110lbs and would try and sit in peoples laps and when my granddaughters would come over he would be is such a panic cause he didnt know which kid to watch. which door to lay in front of and which kid to lay by..so finally he hearded them into the corner of the living room and sat right in front of them and went to sleep.

POINTS IN THE SUNDAY DALLAS PAPER..


Talking points...
"If Great Britain is such an unwelcoming, racist place to live, why do all races continue to flock here, as they do to evil, imperialist America?" julie burchill, in times of london.july 16th

No shit sherlock

"The gobal struggle against violent extremism." The Bush adminstration''s new name for the conflict previously known as "the global war on terror." new york times. july 26th

yeah, right...

"The Supreme Court is supposed to sit above politics and apart from polular whims.But when a large majority of the court's justices have never cross-examined a lying cop or a slippery ceo, never faced a jury, never slogged through the swamps of the modern discovery process, something has gone wrong." stuart taylor, jr. the atlantic monthly sept.issue

yupper

new website...
youblewmeupyoubastard.com
a web site to which people send photos of themselves as they'd like to be remembered in the news media if they are killed by a suicide bomber...

some people have way to much time on their hands.

There is a great article on che Guevara...in sunday dallas am news..
about how people idolize che and the truth is he was a savage killer and known to have killed over 500 people while he was in charge of La Cabana prison in cuba. He oversaw mass executions...so think about that the next time you buy a tshirt with his picture on it...Carlos Santana..

THE WEIRDEST SHIT ALWAYS HAPPENS TO ME


I am vain only about my feet. I have small pretty feet..no ugly toes, nice arch and they hold up my fat ass with few complaints.. but about a month ago I stubbed my left big toe and the nail kind of died on me..so it is trying to come off but looks like crap..and freaks me out..but I was watching tv and they said if you put a hole iin a whole lemon and stuck your toe in there it would make the nail soft enough that you could peel it right off. so I thought, what the fuck, I don't have a life, sitting around watching tv and reading with a lemon on my right big toe, is no biggie...so...I am sitting on the recliner reading my new murder mystery, listening to the tv as golf was on, drinking my sun tea with the lemon on my toe...my neighbor knocks on the door with her little 9 year old grandaughter and I yell, "come on in", and get up to greet them and the lemon flies off my toe and smacks the kid right in the forehead...both of them stand there in total shock as they have no idea why I have just tossed a lemon at the kid and whacked her in the head...Im laughing so hard that I can't explain to them how and why this happened..took me 5 minutes to calm down enough to explain what happened and I'm still not sure they ever believed me..im sure that Maryruth still think I accosted her grandaughter with citrus..and will adventually turn me over to the local police..lucky for me Im good friends with the Judge..
every time I think about it I start to laugh again...