I'm a pagan...I'm a liberal..I live in West, Texas..

Monday, January 16, 2006

MY ASS IS FRESHLY WASHED, POWDERED AND READY FOR BED


I know that is a tad crude, but remember who you're dealing with ...they don't call me tacky jacky for nothing...I took a shower and used my new lavernder shampoo and conditioner, my new body wash that smells flowerely...and dried off really well.Which means I drained the water out of my belly button and dried under my breast twice...slapped on some deodorant, brushed my teeth and put Tabu powder alllllll over my body....put clean night shirt on and clean drawers.I had prepared the bed earlier by changing the sheets, laying down a coat of Tabu powder on the sheets and in the pillow cases, and sprayed everything including me with Tabu parfume...my bedroom smells like a french elevator..now when I squeese my fat ass between the sheets I will be clean and powdered and so will the bed..I will have turned off the tv, the lamp by the bed, and will be all nice and comfy, snuggled in my little bed in my little house in my little town in my big ass state of Texas..I will just start to drift off when I will hear the slamming of the door which means Rocky is home and wants in and to be fed...but I refuse to sweat the small stuff...as I just smell to fucking good...

7 comments:

Babs said...

Heck, you sound almost like Martha Stewart!

JDaaris said...

Don't it feel soooo good to be clean, be powdered, and plop down on clean sheets.... just to have that whole feeling... almost nirvana...

Ann said...

It would be fascinating to see you with your own show...it would have to be pay per view or HBO with all the profanity! But that's why we love you.

Denise said...

Damn! I can smell the Tabu all the way to Tennessee!! LOL

Sounds comfy.

Scottish Toodler said...

Well if you do sweat the small stuff it will smell pretty!!

leo myshkin said...

i remember buying my mom always telling me to buy her a bottle of tabu years ago when i was a small fry.

Clance' McClannahan said...

I love tabu...sometimes I mix amber and a little patchouli oil with it. YUM. I get so many compliments on it.