I swear to the Goddess there's either a full moon out or the crazy planet is in line with the weirdo planet, the stars are crossed, or I'm just fly paper for freaks and assholes..
So, my days off maybe a thing of the past until Easter, and only get it off because the store is closed...yah!..I'm running out of steam...or at least I thought I was until I worked my first day with the 29 year old dufus who is in the management program...Babs and I both take him for an asshole, but I can deal with assholes...hell, I married 3 of them..so that's no biggie..So I thought..So the asshole is never around...you're supposed to be close enough to hear the little dingy bell and come help out at the register..well, I beat that fucking bell till the only sound it makes now is a 'tink' noise when you hit it..no 'AMT'...I am waiting on a lady who is buying $77 worth of Easter candy for a party she's having(I got her address so I could avoid it as I don't want to be within 30 blocks of her house with all those kids hyped up on the candy)and I had 4-5 people waiting behind her..no 'AMT'(assistant manager trainee)
..finally he waltzes up and (6' 185, bald head, 29 years old)and says "What?"(...boil....simmer..boil....)I said as nicely as I could under the circumstances(all those customer witnesses')and said..'do you think you could wait on some of these customers?'...and (brace yourself) he said:"Oh....I thought it was something important."
If there hadn't been so many people I would have bipped him so hard he'd have a full head of hair...When the last customer left the store..I turned to him and said.."You know when you said that you made a lot of people pissed off, and I was number one on the list, and don't let the fact that I'm a 64 year old short fat broad fool you, because if you ever do that again I'll kick your mother fucking ass."...he laughed...I said:"No...I'm not kidding.My smile doesn't mean this shit is funny and I will kick your ass if you do ANYTHING like that again.....So he apologizes and I decide to let it go and not kill him...thinking..it's a one time act of stupidity...yeah, right...Not an hour later, I'm waiting on a customer..making change...MAKING FUCKING CHANGE...and he gets a phone call (not supposed to have cells behind the counter) and sticks the fucking phone in my face and says "look at this one"...(his girlfriend is sending him joke im's) and I said."Not now, can't you see I'm a little busy?"...and he says:"No, it's too good to wait."...I'm still mentally counting to 10 from his little ordeal before and I said.."Look, I don't know how to say this any other way..but NO......NOT NOW."...I was almost yelling..Judas fucking priest..and this dimwit is going to be a manager?....kill me now..
So Inky comes in and I'm still so pissed steam is coming out of my ears..and the manager comes in and is doing face time in the office with AMT(a mental turd), and I'm unloading on poor Inky about this fucking idiot, and what he had done both times..never can find his lazy ass, just ranting and raving and he leans forward and says"you know they can hear you in the office."..and I point at my face and said"does this look like a face that gives a fuck?"...Inky is in hysterics..First of all he's afraid I'm going to either have a stroke or kill the guy..all of which will look bad for him as he recommended me..So the dufus leaves and Inky sort of lets Thom know that Jackie had a little 'episode with the employee.'..so Thom takes me back in the office and poor Inky thinks 'oh shit, she's fired.'....Thom wants to know what happened and I told him, the only thing I needed to make sure was that when I did kick his mother fucking ass, I would take him across the street and not do it on store property..
Thom said..'hell you don't have to go all the way across the street, do it right out side the door, we don't own the sidewalk.'...So....it's only taken me 6 days to tell a fellow employee that I was going to kick his ass.....that may be a record even for me..But I'm not going to be fired..and I'm not in trouble...and Inky doesn't have to worry about me having a stroke..but AMT has about 1 week to get his shit together or he's history..
This is just the icing on a cake of being on eternal hold with AT&T trying to get my dsl fixed..sucks, bites and blows...First I get the robot, then I get some guy who's standing in a barrel in a hole whispering into his hands telling me how to fix my dsl...finally I get a human..and it's Sally from India...who I insult by telling her"don't take this personally sweety, but if I'm going to talk to an Indian I would rather talk to an American Indian."..so(and if I'm lying I'm dying...) she turns me over to a Mexican American, in Texas...I laughed so hard I think I hurt myself..I spent nearly 2 hours on the phone and all I got out of it was a ticket number and a phone number..when I get home I have a message from AT&T who wants to know how things went...so I call him back and tell him...and he keeps calling me sir...and Jock...which isn't making me a happy camper ..I mean it happens a lot...I have a deep voice..my name is spelled Jacque...so I get Jock, Jockque, Jockie, etc..and sir...a lot of sirs...So every time he called me sir, I called him asshole..he caught on after the 3rd time..I spend another hour and 30 minutes talking to Doug, Ben and some other asshole..it's working...but it's still slow...and I hear clicking sound on my phone..Doug said it was because I keep saying 'fuck Bush' on the phone..(I told him that.)I hope they did monitor my calls, I bet they had a good laugh over me calling Ben an asshole and talking smack about Bush...I can't believe I got through this day with out bipping some one, kicking someones ass or getting tossed into jail, for saying'Bush is a lying fucker'..to an AT& T tech support..
the only good part of my day is I bought 2 turkeys from Community Grocery for .39cents a lb..
fuckme till I continue to hold..