I'm a liberal pagan living in West, Texas. Yes. That West, Texas.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

THE REAL WINNER OF THE COKE AND PEPSI WAR

Dr Pepper..............by hundreds of thousands of dollars. There is a new crime wave in Waco and nearby towns. The thieves are stealing Dr Pepper trucks loaded down with Dr Pepper and other Dr Pepper products. Nearly $100,000 in missing Dr Pepper products, including $32,000 worth of soda stolen via tractor-trailer from a Waco distribution center and according to officials being sold on the black market.. Are they stealing Coke?...........NOOOOOOO... are they stealing Pepsi?..NOOOOO..but they are stealing Dr Pepper....I think Dr Pepper should make this their next great ad. Dr Pepper wins the battle between Pepsi and Coke..no one wants to steal their product but they do want to steal Dr Pepper.
Most of the trucks are all locked in but the trucks are loaded with product so the driver can just get in and drive off in the morning. Some leave their keys in the truck..some of the trucks were hot wired. I personally, because I have an evil mind,..fecking love it..Take that Pepsi and Coke...no one likes you enough to steal your sodie pop. They better check their locks at Blue Bell...
oh..by the way..I swear to the Goddess...it wasn't me that hijacked that truck full of Dr Pepper..really..no, really, wasn't me..not me..thought about it, dreamed about it..but never did it..really..honest...

18 comments:

Debra She Who Seeks said...

You better have an iron-clad alibi! And Dexter too.

Kulkuri said...

Don't mean to rain on your parade, but here's something to think about. DR Pepper/Snapple owns Motts and was making a nice profit and paying huge bonuses for management and still had the nerve to demand wage cuts and concessions. The strike was settled, but they installed a two-tier system which will divide the workers between older workers and new-hires. Their reasoning was that they were paying higher than average wages for the area and there were people willing to work for less!!

texlahoma said...

I know you didn't have anything to do with it...(Keep buying Dr Pepper at your local store once in a while even though you have a semi load of it, that will throw them off a bit.)

Jan said...

Black market Dr. Pepper. I love it.

Ted McLaughlin said...

I totally believe in your innocence (but if you could send a few cases this way it would be appreciated).

TheWayfarer said...

I can't get enough of the Throwback version (basically, it's Dublin Dr. Pepper), although there is a mixed drink also called a Dublin Dr. Pepper: 12oz of Throwback DP with a shot of Jameson's in it-gets you from 0 to fucked up as fast as you can slam it.

Mr. Charleston said...

All I can say is, thank God there isn't a Moon Pie distributor near you Granny.

Shrinky said...

You know it makes you fart, don't you? I can just picture the interrogation now - bet it's a short one (evil grin)..

jadedj said...

I hate Dr. Pepper, and Coke, and Pepsi. But the physical growth period of my life definitely depended on moon pies, and contrary to what Mr. C implies, moon pies required...that's...REEEEEEEQUIRED...NEEDED...HAD TO HAVE...R oh C COLA. No ifs about it.

Intense Guy said...

Ahhh... how's the Dr Pepper tasting today YDG? :)

yellowdoggranny said...

I have friends that will swear I was with them, Debra..
all ceo's are assholes..can't get away from them, Kulkuri.
Tex:anyone need a good deal on a semi?
Ted:I used to drink dr Pepper with rum or whiskey with a splash of lemon. pretty fecking good.
Ted:deal!
Mr.Charleston:I used to pack a lunch every day for school with the same thing..a peanut butter jelly sandwich, a small bag of freetos, an apple and a moon pie. 25cents for a dr pepper..
Shrinky:every thing makes you fart when your my age..
Jadedj:yup..even though I drank my dr pepper with my moon pie..the best way is an rc cola and a moon pie.
Intnese:dr pepper is good every day..but like watermelons, they're better stolen.

FoxyMoron said...

We can't get Dr Pepper here anymore, maybe it was a desperate Aussie who nicked all that soda?

rainywalker said...

YDG,
I got rid of the truck like you told me. What are we going to do with all this Dr. Pepper?

Random Thinker said...

I don't know what I'd do without my diet Dr. Pepper. There wouldn't happen to have been any on that truck was there? I mean that you heard anyway.

yellowdoggranny said...

foxy..lets hope so..take the heat off me.
rainy:im drinking mine..
random:gee, I'll ..uh...um..er...have to ask...ha

billy pilgrim said...

i think they should hire kvothe, tempi, marten, dedan and hespe to find the crooks.

rainywalker said...

I can't drink that fast!

Rox said...

LOL