Ok..we all know that I love to share shit with you guys..You would think I would keep my most private thoughts and shit that happens to me on a daily basis to my own damn self, especially if it doesn't exactly make me look good..But noooo.
So my new teeth are wonderful..and I have the smile that earned me the hippy nickname of Sunshine, back..but I'm having issues..it makes a lot of saliva in my mouth making me swallow a lot. When I do that I suck in a lot of air..causing me to burp a lot...AFUCKINGLOT and if the air I suck in has its traveling shoes on it will come out the other end..So I had Abby a couple of weeks ago and I was having issues with this problem...she's in the bathroom yelling 'come wipe me..I have pooped.' so I go running to her..Ok..disclaimer here..my fat ass doesn't run...but I can skoot pretty good.. by the time I make it to the bathroom I'm armed and ready....I was burping and farting..at will..so I'd burp...then fart and fart some more and burp some more..and it went on for a couple of minutes ..it was a sight to see as I would bow and burp..lift leg and fart..wiggling from foot to foot and farting at the same time..I ended my performance with the loudest fart ever..all during this time Abby is watching me from the toilet slack jawed..after several seconds she sits back and said '...can you do that again?'
Man I got me some skills..