Saturday, October 29, 2005

STUFF ABOUT CHILI


i am lucky to own three of the greatest chili books every written..."A Bowl Of Red" by frank x. tolbert, "The Great Chili Confrontation" by h. allen smith(my first last and best hero) and "The Great American Chili Book" by bill bridges...the book by h. allen smith was written about the first chili cookoff in terlingua, texas...if you ever get a chance to read it, it is one of the funniest books ever..but then every thing that ole h. allen wrote was funny. i named my first son after him..david michael allen brown...the allen after h. allen..when i wrote and told him i had named my son after him he was very pleased as so far the only thing named after him was a weiner dog ...and he said having a human named after him was much better than having a dog named after him..we wrote to each other for years...but back to the chili books..in the great chili confrontation he says that everyone wants the claim of making the first chili..new mexico, texas etc...but that they could trace back thru time the first chili made and was made in mexico..he cited the classic work by bernal diaz del castillo, which chronicles the invasion of mexico city by cortez and his conquistadores in the 16th century. diaz reports that he wintnessed a ceremony in which some of his spanish compadres were sacrifided by aztec priests, and then butchered; chunks of conquistadore meat were thrown to the populace, and these people rushed home and cooked them with hot peppers , wild tomatoes, and an herb that apparently was oregano..so to sit down to make real chili, the recipe must begin, "first, catch yourself a lean spaniard..."..ahh, i miss ole h. allen
now in the "a bowl of red" it includes the chili prayer.."Lord, God, You know us old cowhands is forgetful.Sometimes, I can't even recollect what happened yestiddy.We is forgetful. We just know daylight and dark, summer, fall, winter, and spring.But I sure hope we don't never forget to thank You before we is about to eat a mess of good chili.
"We don't know why, in Your wisdom, You been so doggone good to us. The heathen Chinee don't have no chilie, ever. The Frenchmens is lieft out. The Rooshians don't know no more about chili than a hog does about a side saddle.Even the Meskins don't get a good whiff of it unless they stay around here.
"Chili eaters is some of Your chosen people. We don't know why You so doggone good to us. But, Lord, God, don't never think we ain't grateful for this chilie we about to eat. Amen."

now that is a prayer..but should have been to the goddess, but don't think cowboys are inclined to worship a woman as a diety...unless she can make a hellacius pot of chili...

THE HAPS IN WEST AND AROUND THE WORLD


im going to pretend that my message got thru to you all and things are getting back to normal..what is sad is the blogster is so fucking slow that i cant even read most of the post all of you make and when i do get thru and read them, instead of witty funny insightful remarks they are grumbling, grouchy bitchy pissing and moaning..so im going to pretend all is well and continue to post my "stuff"(your shit, my stuff)...and hope all is settling down..and by the way..thanks sooner for the update...you the man..


i have been singing the battle of jerico.."and the walls came tumbling down"...every since harriet got bounced and "scooter" got busted..remember when i said i didnt have to do anything to ole forest as the goddess would take care of it for us? well...this is the work of the goddess and ole fitzgerald from chicago..he rocks..i loved his comparison to a batter getting hit in the head by a pitch...was it intentional, was it a slip, did he just mean to hit him on the chin..i was cracking up laughing..men are so silly..using sports analogies to get us thru another republican fuckup...ahhhh, next to go is cheney and then ole forest himself...thank you goddess, i for one appreciate it..knew it was just a matter of time before that entire administration just emploded...
well, in the little town of west..we are still celebrating scott and the other sox's win...and to top it off, west high school band earned a division 1 in marching...their best preformance grabbed them the top rating at the region 8 university interscholastic league marching contest...so we are all proud of the west youth's...and of course scott...wonder when the parade will be...?man, i cant get over how much resemblance there is between him and 2 of the granddaughters..especially haley..the little one..she looks more like her mama and the podsednik's..nicole looks more like her daddy and the browns...wow....
west knights of columbus is breaking grounds for a new facility...they let the church ladies of west use their kitchen for west fest and they make the best beer bread you have ever had...the west chamber of commerce is sponsoring halloween alley. will have free face painting for the kids..and all the local business's will be handing out free candy....one new birth, 2 birthdays and 5 deaths..we are losing ground again.plus someone is opening a new bed and breakfast..out in tours...be nice for west fest and family reunions..had one here in town.but people got to old to fool with it so closed it down...i spend 3 hours at laundry mat yesterday doing my laundry..i hate to do laundry..that was always the kids job and boy do i miss that..tours hall is celebrating their 50th annivesary...tours is a little tiny town right down the road from west..between west and leroy...on the other side of i-35 is ross and tokio...
kc hall is having a 42 domino tournament...in 1956 the were advertizing a 56 plymouth belvedere. aerodynamic styping, push button driving and powerful he hy-fire 277 engine...man you should see the fins on this hummer...west high school trojans beat venus, texas 70-8...and the lady trojans volleyball team are playoff bound..will the fort worth castelberry team..if anyone is interested in a new business, there are 2 resturants for sale..actually 3, but one has been on the market for so long, dont know how good a buy it is...would like to open up one of them and make it a tex/cajun resturant...i could do that...plus there is a bakery for sale..the oldest bakery in west...folks are just too old to run it anymore...there is a charming 2 bed on small lot for $44,900...houses are so cheap here..it is cheaper to buy than to rent...i still pay $225 a month for my little one bedroom..kind of renting it buying it...
well, that is the haps for west this week...same ole same ole...some die, some new ones are born...and the beat goes on...

Thursday, October 27, 2005

GROW THE FUCK UP YOU BUNCH OF PUSSIES


i am up to the top line of my red neck with all this bull shit that is going on with all the blogsters...there is enought shit going just to find time to post, read comments and try to read an occasional email...but this bullshit with one person against another person and one against all..and all against one..well, it is just to stupid and 3rd grade for me to sit by and let it all go down the tubes..i came on to blogster.com to have fun and piss off the right wing christian right republicans..instead..i made some great friends...but now all these witty funny sweet people have turned into gigantic assholes...i have said it before..and will say it again...but this is the last time. so pay fucking attention...stop with this posting of mean shit on each other's site..stop being mean spirtied, thin skinned jackassess..i swear to the goddess, this is worse than high school..it is so childish i cant even begin to understand what started it or what is keeping it going..but fuck you all..your stupid and childish and someone needs to reel you little assholes in...grow the fuck up...post what you want, but dont use it to be vicious and mean to other bloggers..stop posting mean and hurtful comments on your blog site..i know it is your site and you should be able to post what you want..but quit using it to act like 3rd graders...or jilted lovers..i repeat..grow the fuck up..you know who you are..and yes, this is to you..and you..and you too asshole..so SNAP OUT OF IT...fuckers..

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

MARATHON GAME


man was that a baseball game or what...???? i am so sorry for the astro fans...i know my sweet little aunt who is 80 years old, works 50 hours a week and still packs a gun is just so pissed ..she has been an astro fan since the first day they moved to town..she has lived in houston since the 30's and loves her team..all my cousins love the astro's, they go to all the games..i even root for them all the time..them and the rangers as i am all that is texas..but the sox's are not to be denied..i actually think they will lose the game tonight just so they can go home and win it in front of the home team...which eveyone assures me is wrong..they will win if they can and then go home and celebrate with the fans..i feel guilty for not rooting for the astros..but i cant deny our hometown boy...now in a perfect world he would play for the astro's...i just know that if the sox win..we will have a parade and all the bells and whistles for scott...i had forgotten when i first moved back to west that i helped my friend michael coach t-ball and scott was the other coach...and mike told me that scott was freaked out by me..didnt know they made women like me..who knew sports, cussed and raised hell..ha..he should have seen me when i drank...im tepid tea compared to what i was when i drank..but funny to think that sweet innocent kid is now whacking them balls out of the park in the world series...bet he has met alot more women like me by now..
i made myself laugh last night by saying "the new pitcher is...cox for soxs...another thing that made me laugh was one of the protestors in front of the white house had a tshirt on that said bushit...cracked me up...and then to top off my morning saw joe nichols sing "tequila makes her clothes fall off" on the view..could have been my theme song back in the 70's and 80's...i won $20 on a tequilla drinking contest back in 1969...customer at the bar where i worked bet me $20 that i couldnt drink a bottle of tequilla...so did...then went across the street and had another shot of tequilla..then drove(fuckme) home where i parked my station wagon on top off my highly loved and tenderly cared for rose bushes..slept for about 2-3 hours, got back in the station wagon went to the embers and had 2 shots of tequilla...then drove across town to the palm gardens where the bartender said i finished off his bottle of tequilla which had about 4 shots in it and one out of the new bottle and then went home again..the next day when i was picking cactus needles out of the pores of my skin i mentioned that i really got drunk on tequilla and no one knew i was drunk..they said i was quiet..but looked perfectly sober to them..hince comes the word stoned...for having drunk too much tequilla..(drunk..?drank??)all i know is the enamel on my teeth was gone from sucking on all the limes and lemons with the tequilla..and we figured it out that i had drank(drunk) over 1 1/2 bottles of tequilla in less than 5 hours..not counting the 2-3 hour nap...the thought of actually drinking tequilla now makes me gag...

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

'MO SHIT TO THINK ABOUT..


bette midler has a new album coming out...cant wait...

If they give you ruled paper, write the other way.
jaun ramon jimenex

things to avoid...
a truck with these two bumper stickers on it...
DISABLED VET AND I SUPPORT NRA...
have a feeling the first fender bender he would hobble out and pull a gun on you...

i was watching letterman last night and he had nicolas cage on the show..now i think he is a great actor and for some reason thought he was kinda hot...but last night he was on and he has been running and eating better and has lost a lot of weight..and im staring at him thinking ..."there is something familar about him ..now what the fuck is it??" and all of a sudden my heart started racing and i got all sweaty and clammy and felt light headed....with the mustashe and the weight loss he looks just like my first husband..i almost had a full blown panic attack...freaked me out...made the gypsy sing to ward off evil spirits and spit three times...finally had to switch over to nightline as i couldnt stand to look at him any more..

and speaking of husbands..if i had married all the men i said i would ...well, i'd still be getting the divorces...one time i was supposed to marry this guy, who was a nice enough guy and he loved my sons and had a good job....but everyone felt he was just not the one for me..i worked as a bartender at the palm gardens in portland oregon and my boss, the other bartenders and waitress's thought he was wrong..wrong ..wrong...so they arranged to have me kidnapped by larry peirce...who was beginning to ring a few bells with me...so after work he asked to take me out for breakfast as my last meal as a single person...said what they hell, what could it hurt? huh huh...we went in his new shelby...and we had breakfast and he put me in his car and took off the opposite way from where my car was...i said what's up? he said..its a surprise...he took me home with him and locked me in the house with him for 3 days...(my girlfriend had my sons for the wedding and honeymoon that i never went on)..after the second day of captivity i had him locked in ....so that was one wedding i never made it to...they said the groom to be waited at the church for 3 hours...finally someone told him i had run off with larry and he joined the merchant marines...and didnt see him again for 2 years...i think i did similar type things like that for about 3 other almost marriages...larry saved me from them all...the reason we never got married is...we were both scorpio's and just exactly alike...which meant we were ok for fucking but that was about all...he was pretty funny though...every time he would come in the bar i would say "pierce..you wanna beer".? and he would say "do fish fuck"...or "is there a nigger in okland.."...made him quit saying that last one before he started a fight with someone..wonder what ever happened to old larry...?

ITS A BEAUTIFUL DAY IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD


everyone you speak to in all the stores or on the streets of west is a happy sumbitch...we are all sporting #22 signs on our assorted cars and trucks..all the store windows have go scott#22 on them...and eveyone had this big shit eating grin on their faces...scott and the chicago white sox have brought happiness and joy into our little town of drunk czech's...its a good thing...today in the post office there were about 5 of us recounting every play of the 2 games, laughing and grinning...it's fucking contagious...we is all happy...we would bitch a little about the cowboys but then it was oh, fuck them..lets talk about scott somemore...and to make it even better..the weather is wonderful...and my house is almost completely cleaned..have the bedroom almost done...and kitchen is done..and still working on bath and living room..but the house smells good. made a pot of beans and a pot of chili...rocky actually ate the canned cat food i got him this time and letterman even mentioned scott last night on his show..of course he kept mispronouncing his name but that's ok..when he hits another home run to win the series he can have him on the show and scott can tell him in person how to pronounce his name..so all is good in my little world which naturally pisses me off...how the fuck can i scream and rant about anything if im in a good fucking mood? that sucks..happiness is not all that it is cracked up to be..ruins all my bitching time..oh well, im sure i can think of something...forest will fuck up ...im waiting for him to go on some drunken coke binge and jump from the balcony of the white house...huh..huh...

Monday, October 24, 2005

PODSEDNEK RULES........


i have been in quandry with the world series...im thrilled to death that houston is in the series...i love having a texas team in there and all my cousins and aunts that live in houston and the houstona area are huge fans of the astros...so i want them to win...BUT....#22 of the chicago white sox is Scott Podsednek of................you guessed it..west, by god texas....home town boy makes good...and couldnt be a nicer kid...just one of them really good kids...plus he is sorta kinda kin folk...he is my ex daughter in laws first cousin..which makes him second cousin to two of my granddaughters..nicole and haley...their mama cecilia is a dulock but her mama was a podsednek..got that...or as i like to say about folks here in west...kinfolk...kinfolk...we is all kinfolk...so i want scott to win...or his team so he can win...and after last night...they may do it..cause ole scotty boy hit a fucking home run to win the game..in case anyone missed it...it was fantastic...i was yelling and screaming and rocky was running for cover....between the cowboys and scott, im going to have a stroke yet...but was that exciting or what..and to think that was our very own little scott...its really a big deal..couldnt ask for a better person to represent west than scott...and i for one really needed something good to happen in sports after that fuck up the cowboys pulled sunday..assholes...man was i pissed...i bet ole parcells is still chewing on their asses....boy howdy...any way ..going to go light a candle for scott and one for the cowboys..they need all the help they can get...fuckers..

HE'S NOT KINKY ..HE'S MY GOVERNOR


thom my son who is still not speaking to me...bought me a bumper sticker while he was in san francisco visiting maryjo...a kinky friedman for governor bumper sticker..still not sure if i will vote for him or not..like i said..he voted for bush and still hangs out with laura on occasion..so that is not a good thing...just because she reads books does not make her a reliable person of note...she married the asshole and had those two white trash drunk daughters with him and you know some of that mean bitch shit rubbed off on her from forest's mother..the queen of bitches...so he is going to have to talk to me about some issues before i throw away a vote for him...
i dont know how to feel this monday..im pissed about the cowboys loss which was soooo unavoidable...but thrilled about scott's homerun and win...sooo i think i will play psycho bitch to day..be mean and nasty and happy all at the same time...that should fake out the natives...but more on the mean and nasty side as blogster is still fucked up...what a bunch of crap..think we should do a write in for them to hire barbara to help them fix this fucker...everyone email them to hire barbara..on the count of 3....

IMPOSTOR


dont know if this is kosher or not but im highly recommending a book and will quote from it too...title is "Impostor:How George W.Bush Bankrupted America and Betrayed the Reagan Legacy"...by Bruce Bartlett...
quote from book...
"The truth that is now dawning on many movement conservatives is that George W. Bush is not one of them and never has been. They were allies for a long time, to be sure, and conservatives used Bush just as he used them. But it now appears that they are heading for divorce."

no shit sherlock...and for more proof of this:
"on Thursday, Manhattan's districk attorney announced that a Virginia oil-trading ompany pleaded guilty to grand larcency in an oil-for-food program kickback scheme, and agreed to pay a $250,000 fine as part of the negotiations.."..(that is like me paying a .25 cent a day library fine...)this is just the tip of the ice burg of all the little deals made to help the rich get richer in bush's little "lets invade iraq" and make money for my bidness cronies...another tip is the $20 ice tray...the pentagon paid $20 apiece for plastic ice cube trays that once cost it .85cents..it paid a supplier more than $81 apiece for coffeemakeers that it bought for years for just $29 from the manufacturer.That's because instead of getting competive bids or buying directly from the manufacturers as it used to, the Pentagon is using middlemen who set their own prices. and its costing taxpayers 20 percent more than the old system. prime vendor sales increased from $2.3 billiion to $7.4 billion....and does anyone want to bet that they people frofitting fromt this little deal gave to the coffers of george or to his daddy..????fuck me til i clog dance..

MORE WIT AND WISDOM FROM FOREST


"THE QUESTIONNAIRE THAT SHE FILLED OUT IS AN IMPORTANT QUESTIONNAIRE, AND OBVIOUSLY THEY WILL ADDRESS THE QUESTIONS THAT THEY SENATORS HAVE IN THE QUESTIONNAIRE...OR AS A RESULT OF THE ANSWERS TO THE QUESTIONS IN THE QUESTIONNAIRE"..PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH, ON THE COMPLETED QUESTIONNAIRE HARRIET MIERS PROVIDED TO THE SENATE JUDICIARY COMMITTEE....(WHITEHOUSE.GOV. OCT.20TH)doh????whatthefuck?????fuck me till i stuff mushrooms..

Saturday, October 22, 2005

A WEEKEND AT SOONER'S BAR AND GRILL

THERE WAS MUCH OF THE BEAUTIFUL, MUCH OF THE WANTON, MUCH OF THE BIZARRE, SOMETHING OF THE TERRIBLE, AND NOT A LITTLE OF THAT WHICH MIGHT HAVE EXCITED DISGUST......



THE MAQUE OF THE RED DEATH BY POE

MY SAT AM UP DATE


i have been so pissed about the blogsite that i feel i have neglected forest gump and left him to his own devices....but acticle in paper yesterday made me laugh so hard i woke rocky up...i seems that ole forest's popularity poll's show that he is falling out of favor...and it looks like 98 percent of the black population is smarter than 62 percent of the white population...the article says that only 2 percent of black america believe forest is doing a good job...they feel "unrepresented and unappreciated by this president"..doh...that's ok..some of us white folk feel the same way...he and key congressional republicans are bearing down on welfare and other social programs for deep cuts to help fun the military operations in iraq...well, it only took them and the rest of the white folk to figure out what we have known all along...bush doesnt give a shit about you unless you are one of his rich business partners or rich partner of one of his rich business partners...if your rich or one of his cronies you can get elected to fema or the supreme court...enough to make me start drinking again..watched letterman last night and al franklin was on...man is he funny ..he has a new book and its called the truth and some funny stuff...said that what 'SCOOTER' had done was treason and if bush knew about it, it was treason and he would be put to death...i laughed so hard..cant wait till henrietta gets the book for the library...


I FEEL SOOOOOO GUILTY... while thom and ima were in san francisco visiting maryjo he got me a bumper sticker...now i was so sure that he was still pissed enought at me that when i heard the bumper sticker was HE'S NOT KINKY HE'S MY GOVERNOR.. i thought it was a sticker about arnold...calif.governor..just wasent thinking and was being paranoid..fucking stupid me..any how jenny brought it over yesterday and it was for kinky friedman...for gov of texas...and i was thrilled with it...so thom did a good thing for me and i automatically thought the wrong thing..im such a bitch...fuck.....feel so bad..will email him ...a thank you ...

while im on bush i must give a shout out to ass hole brown...did you read in paper or watch the news about the emails that were sent back and forth to him...???oh man..what a field day the press is having with him...i love it...he gets an email from someone in the dome and complaining about no water, no food, etc..and the email back is from his asst. saying that brown needed an hour to eat his dinner and would go on tv after he had eaten...when she got the email she sent this:'OH MY GOD!!!!!!!JUST TELL HER THAT I JUST ATE AN MRE(MEAL READY TO EAT) AND CRAPPED IN THE HALLWAY OF THE SUPERDOME ALONG WITH 30,000 OTHER CLOSE FRIENDS SO I UNDERSTAND HER CONCERN ABOUT BUSY RESTURANTS'...
how can anyone be so fucking stupid...oh, that's right..he's a friend of bush's....argh!!!!!!

AND STILLL CHAMPION...ROCKY RACOON


my next door neighbor maryruth came over with her little dog..they were going for a walk and stopped by...now rocky has been around dogs all of his time with me..from pit bulls, shar-peis, and great danes...no problem..he egnores them just like he does my human friends...well, yesterday he proved his dominance of the yard...maryruth's dog is just the sweetest little thing..i mean her name is precious for goddess sake..i had gone her some"snicky snacks" as we call them in my family and was giving her one at a time, and she got right up next to me to get them...rocky was laying on his back in the middle of the yard and in a movement so fast you almost couldnt see it..zipped across the yard and slashed out at the cat about 8 times before anyone could react...if precious didnt have such a thick body of fur she would have been laying in the yard ripped to shreds..rocky chased her out of the yard....was puffed up twice his size..and walked on his tip toes all over the yard making weird fucking noises...panther noises...cracked me up...picked him up and he started purring...and arching into my hand to be petted..never have i seen him do anything like that..he was super cat..bat cat...x-cat................my hero...

Thursday, October 20, 2005

FUCK ME TILL I KNIT


i tried to read and comment on several blogs..did some on sooners and one on liberallikejesus...but it takes soooo fucking long...you guys are going to wake up one of these days and head lines on front pages of papers all over america are going to be about a little old lady that flips out in local library and puts her converse high tops thru computer screen, muttering and screaming as they carry her away.."im going to fucking get you neil and bob...be afraid...be very afraid." well, i decided to do my spring cleaning..little slow..have most of furniture in bed room moved out and going to give it a good scrubbing...hose it down maybe..i live in here..other room is full of assorted furniture and books..one day i will make a short list of some of the weird books i have..like the one on the adams family, faulty towers, buffalo bob,alfred hichcock, queens of england, history of england, the world, literature books, how to write good, books,horoscope books,books on china, south america,texas,and that is just a few..have what is called in high class book circles...a shit load of books..going to go thru them this week end and sell some of them...have a bunch of collector items that i got for $1 and now can make some money on them...hate to do it but that is what i bought a bunch of them for..to resell...but like ripping my arms off..i love my books...well, heading to the house...see you all saturday..hopefully the blog site will be fixed....i jest..we all know it is truly fucked forever...

NEIL AND BOB CAN KISS MY ASS


SONOFABITCHING, MOTHERFUCKING,COCKSUCKING ASSHOLES...





ANGRY POST TO FOLLOW




*Note: Reference is to new owners that took over Blogster and made it suck ass

YUP, I WAS A GIRL SCOUT


when we were in hawaii mother needed something to keep me out of trouble..for christmas i got a bike and i had named it blossom bailey roycroft and would take a snack of peanut butter, jelly sandwitches and some birdseed for pete. i would put my hair which came to my waist in a pony tail and flip the long end up thru rubber band again and pete would ride in my hair, it made a great nest for him..we would sneak out of the house at about 6:45 right after daddy went to work and i knew mother wouldnt rise and start bitching til 11 or so..in time to get up fix daddy's lunch and act like she had been cleaning house all morning.. so i knew i wouldnt be missed for awhile..we would jump on ole blossom and ride across the base to the back fence and i had dug a huge hole under it and would push bike thru and get on "highway 1"(only one in hawaii, at the time) and pedal my little skinny ass to keeakee(dont know how to spell it but that was how we pronounced it)beach...where all the gi's and girls hung out as it was the closest to the base...there were huge fat mama's making lei's and running food shacks...i would swim in the ocean all morning while pete hung in my pony tail and screaming fuck the yankees at the top of his little voice..he also could mimic my mothers voice and would give me a start every now and then by yelling in my mothers voice.."jackisue im going to whip your ass"..by this time mother and daddy had discovered i had made the slip again and would call out the ap's(air police) and they would drive right to the beach and start looking for me..i had spotters all up and down the beach ..every gi knew me and the cussin' bird as they called pete and would warn me..i would run to the mama's and hide under their mumu's...they were like omar's tents...finally the police said they were just wasting time and could never catch me and it was up to mama and daddy to keep me under lock and key...i
enter...the girl scouts..mother figured that i would be kept busy enough that i would stay out of trouble...she should have known better...first weekend we went on a field trip and went to a sugar refinery..if you have never been, it is the most god awful smell in the world..right next to a rotting body... i didnt have my full uniform yet and was wearing the leaders little beanie cap...the smell was making me sick so i threw up in her hat...she didnt know me yet and took my word for it that it was just a bad reaction and i grabbed the first thing available...second weekend we went out to the lurilene a huge luxury liner...not as big as the QE-two but it was pretty damn big...i split off from the group almost immediately and went exploring..they found me 3 hours later in the crew's kitchen learning how to shoot craps...by then i was good enough to have started winning money so was pretty pissed when they made me leave...by then the leader had my number...third weekend..........
huh huh...we went camping at this beautiful camp ground by a water fall....had tables under thatched roofs made of palm fonds..we unloaded all the food, and gear and the adults went off to decide about which cabins for which girls etc...the leader walked up to me and said what ever you do....dont start the fires yet...now either she knew the outcome of this adventure and had found a good way to get rid of me..or was just fucking stupid...because i made a campfire to roast marshmellows and burned down all the thatched roofs over all the tables..that was the extent of my being a girl scout...i went back to the beach...and pete and i spent every summer there for three years..

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

GOOD BOOK HEAVEN...


and i have been there for the past 10 days or so...have read read books..robin cooks new one was pretty damn good...and just finished one called midas by russell andrews and this is a yafta...yafta read it...is current to what is going on in the white house and the world today and all the principle bad guys are like the ones working for bush..oil, corruption, terrorists, big bidnesmen that are fucking the country and when they finally bust everyone the only innocent one is the president cause he is too dumb to be put in the loop and to stupid to figure it out..good good read...

if i had a computer at home i am sure i would watch alot less tv.but since i dont..i do..you all know im crazy about lost cause it is just a great mystery plus all the guys are pretty damn good looking running around in their barechests...but the best tv show is still boston legal...the best show, best cast, best stories and with all that they still find new ways to crack me up in laughter.i mean the out loud hoohaw laughing ...spader and shatner may the best duo on tv since....well...since lucy and desi..johnny and ed. you get the idea...candance bergan is on and she and shatner are so good together..he is always trying to get her to fuck him and she puts him down in such a way that i need to keep notes..then their is betty white who killed the serial killer..the little munchkin guy that played on will and grace..oh goddess. what laughter they brought...im telling you ..you need to mark your calandar for tuesday night 9pm and try it one time for me...you'll never be sorry..you'll leave me money in your will..you'll name kids after me..really...

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

I SURVIVED THE SHIT FEST OF 2005


and hope to never have to talk about this again..i am so much better, with the exception of the thwidth noise my asshole makes when i walk..i am good.my ass hasent seen that much action since...well, that is another story for another time..but i can comfortably say that the gyster is out of business..found out it is something that is going around..but no one was quite as graphic as me telling about their ailment..i was at grocery store regaling the girls with my ass spewing tales and one of the girls laughed so hard she spit her gum across the room..told me to shut up before she peed herself..told her please enought shit and urine jokes...she had to leave the register and run to the bathroom...ahh, i love life..
im afraid im becoming like mel gibson in the conspiracy movie blaming everything on neil and bob..denise was right ..i went back and edited abunch of h's out of the title of my blog and things went back to normal...jackiesue 83..neil and bob..1
i am just so pissed that i cant read any post and cant comment...commenting on everyone's post is one of my favorite things and something i do well. just dont jot down something..i give considerable thought to comments that will be either funny or gross or both..
the weather in west has gone from fall to summer again..told you...it is now back up in the 90's..althought they say there will be rain tomorrow..they wish...me too. yard looks like needles calif in july...speaking of needles in july..did any of you ever drive in a car across death valley during the summer back in the 50's or 60's..when ac's where unhead of in most cars? i remember all the cars had these canvsas bags full of water hung on the hood's..in 1955 i think we were coming back from hawaii and driving to laredo texas..what a downer..3 years in hawaii to laredo texas...we flew navy from hickam afb to la and then daddy bought a car and we drove the rest of the way. was summer time and we had my bird pete in a cage who was not handling the heat very well after spending his entire life in hawaii. pete who had the nastiest vocabulary of any bird every was absolutely livid in that fucking cage..he had never been in a cage befor..he had a"playpen"..just a base with perches and toys..so here we are driving across the desert, in the middle of summer going across death valley. me pissed because i didnt want to leave hawaii, mom pissed because daddy wouldnt fly and buy a car in texas and daddy singing ernest tubb songs...and pete in all his glory screaming at the top of his lungs"sonofagoddamnbitch mother fucker,fuck the yankees, a lot of japanese...ball fucking four you cocksucker..."...by the time we reached our kinfolk in arizona we were hysterical with laughter...we were a family that screamed, fought cussed and then laughed our asses off...adventually the laughter faded and there was only the screaming and cussing..an occasional whacking of someone upside the head with a skillet but no more laughter..but then it was good...just the three of us laughing our asses off at that stupid bird.

Monday, October 17, 2005

NEIL AND BOB ARE FUCKING WITH ME AGAIN


judas fucking priest...this is enought to piss all all the saints, 3 popes and 9 bishops..
not only is the fucker sloooooooooooowwwww..now my site is all fucked up..now tell me this is not part of their plan to fuck with me...so im going to finish this one blog and then im going to go home and sit on the toilet..
check out this website..show it to your kids..www.hollywoodpolice.org..
have seen it several times in paper but first i knew they had a web site to check out all the pictures..she died right after the last picture was taken...

a west home town boy scott podsednik of the white socks is going to the world series...he is #22 and such a great kid..he comes home when he can and always sneaks in so no one will make a fuss..just wish the damn announcers would pronounce his name right..its pronounced pasednek.not podsnek..butt holes..i know i should be rooting for the whole team of houston..but i want white socks to win..just for scott..

the best reason why harriet mier's should not be supreme court judge

"you are the best governor ever."on a 1997 birthday card to then governor george w bush..i wish i could list you all the ways that man has fucked up our state and then being followed by good hair perry it has continued down the road to hell..like we like to say..thank god for mississippi(sorry mentalhealthrn) but if it wasent for mississippi we could be no 50 in the list of the worse state insurance for childent, health care, poverty...etc..all i can say is..its that damn ann richards fault..if she had taken him more seriously when he was running against her and not let him win ...he would have lost and gone off and licked his wounds and started drinking and doing coke again..fuck me till i dance with castanets and speak castillian spanish..i have the lisp for it..

START THE DAY OFF BY AT LEAST PISSING OFF SOMEONE


when i come to the library there are usally not a whole bunch on the computers..we have 5 in a row and i pretty much am the only one here..maybe travis.or kids that play games...but there is this one pair of old sisters, one is in her 80's and the other one is in her 70's...hard to tell..the old lady likes to talk..i dont like to be rude..but am excellent at it if givent the right oppurtunity..so she decides to get into a long lengthy conversation with me about dogs, neighbors etc..she hates both...i had 91 emails and was trying to half be polite and listen to her and read my emails..finally after her not getting the hint..i just ignored her..i finally said.."look, i dont want to be rude but i only have a limited amout of time to take care of things i need to do
on the computer and as much as i think it is interesting that as much as you hate dogs and neighbors you have managed to live as long as you have...im busy and im not really listening to you nor do i care...so then i got to listen to her talk for 15 minutes about how sorry she was..finally i said."like i said i dont want to be rude, but if that is what it takes..please shut up and leave me alone.."...
it worked

when ever i get sick and someone askes me how i feel i usually say"like hammered shit"..
well, i would give $1,000 to have shit hard enough to hammer...i have had then what could only be called
"strained shit"...i have taken up residence in the bathroom..i have an end table, crossword puzzles, remote, dallas paper, book, glasses and small glass of warm 7-up...have angled the mirror so i can see the tv. and can reach around the corner and flip channels.this has been going on since last friday..my rib cage and back and stomache are so sore from the straining when i throw up and well, i know you dont want to know all the gory details..but let me state up front...it's like having a gyser shooting water out of my ass every 4 mimutes...so i havent had anything to eat or drink since last night and so far im safe to go out in public..but one sip of warm 70up manages to make 4 gallons of watery ..cant even call it shit..its water that smells like shit..ha..and who said i thought my shit didnt stink..?times like this is when i wish i had a mate...someone to apply wet compress to my fevered brow, make me hot tea with lemon and honey..fluff my covers and ....yeah, right..like that would ever happen..only person that did that for me was my mother..well, i take that back when the kids were living at home they would take care of me while i was sick..gave me lots of meds that would make me sleep and then they would steal my jeep and go joy riding..mother always made me hot tea, with honey and lemon, soft boiled egg and soft toast..used to throw the egg in the toilet..gross...
baked a chicken last night and going to make homemade chicken noodles..maybe that will help..if not i may not be here for a few days..till i either shit myself away or get better..

GRILLED CHOCOLATE SANDWICH


this was in the dallas am news and when i read it i knew i wasent long for my spinach tuna diet...oh goddess, i would kill someone for this sandwitch...read on and whimper..
grilled chocolate sandwich
2 large slices walnut bread or raisin bread from a bakery..
1/2 tablespoon butter
1 1/2 ounches bittersweet chocolate bar, preferably with at least 60 percent cocoa(see note)
posdered sugar...
so far so good
spred 2 slices of bread lightly with butter. Top the unbuttered side of 1 slice with the chocolate9if necessary, cut the chocolate in pieces to didstribute it evenly). top with the other slice, buttered side out.
heat a non stick or cast-iron skillet over medium-high. cook the sandwich in the skillet until golden brown on both sides.sprinkle with powdered sugar. cut in half or in forths(or just cram the sucker right into your mouth)and serve immediately..yeah, like anyone is going to make that beauty and let it cool..makes 2 to 4 snack servings. depending on discipline level...(in my case..maybe 3 bites) note..lahrhona and scharffen berger make high-quality dark chocolate..look for them at whole food market and gourmet cooking shops..
wonder if two slices of mrs. baird's rasin bread and hershey's will work in a pinch...??
is this too die for..? man oh man...

URINEGONE....


was watching tv realy late and this commercial popped on and i laughed so hard i almost fell out of the chair..swear to goddess they were advertising a product called urinegone...for animal piss...or human if you live with a drunk...all you have to do is spray it and somehow it breaks down enzimes and takes the odor away..even gives you some sort of black light that shows where old urine is so you can spray it too...so it gave me an idea about a new product they should have invented.."assholegone"...an asshole appears on your door step(pesky neighbors, unwanted relatives and assorted salespeople"..and you just spray it on them and poof ..they're gone.this could also apply to asshole relatives and rightwing republicans..if they could make that a reality i would try to get out and spray as many assholes as possible before some one got me first...

Saturday, October 15, 2005

HANK WILLIAMS...POOR SCHMUCK


just read his new biography and what a sad sad life that man lived..no wonder he could write about lost love and heartbreak with so much passion and pathos...
HEAR THAT LONESOME WHIPPERWILL,
HE SOUNDS TOO BLUE TO FLY;
THAT MIDNIGHT TRAIN IS WHINING LOW,
I'M SO LONESOME I COULD CRY..


some one should have kicked his wives assess..both of them..but especially that audrey bitch..hope she is roasting in hell..if you like bio's this is a good one...and not very big..small book..
going to the house now..left a comment on walleyemans blog...im such a bitch..i swear to the goddess..tried the old jewish mother guilt trip which i almost fell for .about how he cant be around people catches colds, etc..but look under his hobbies..sure has a lot of outdoor activities for someone that needs to be indoors so much..wish him good heath and sorry about it..but blogster still sucks..and he is saying authur has done something to fuck it up...if that is true i will have to kick ole authurs ass...prick...see you monday..that is if the goddess hasent thrown a bolt of lightning at my ass for being a mean bitch...oh well, i have 6 good friends..enought to carry the casket..unless one of them sonsabitches dies i dont have a great need for making more friends...

DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A FACE THAT GIVES A SHIT?


I tell people all the time"take a good long look at this face..and tell me..does this look like a face that gives a shit?...
my earliest memories are of me getting my ass in trouble for speaking out...saying what i think even if no one wants to hear it..i was not born with that switch in your brain that relays your thoughts to a room where it is mulled over and edited before it continues the trip to your mouth..it was probably burnt out some time while i was in the womb..as i never remember having that ability ..if i thought it..i said it..and after wards i have been heard to say:"fuck, did i just say that outloud"....or "oh what the fuck was i thinking...".well,doh...you weren't jackisue...i have always had this weird sick sense of humor and have passed it on to 3 of my kids and at least 2 of the grandkids...i have said things that i thought were soo fucking funny ..and have had people pissed at me for 15 years because..well, maybe it wasn't funny TO THEM....oh well...anyone that has spent over 30 minutes in conversation will have figured out not to ask me what i think...cause i will tell you..you dont want to know what i think of that new puce dress with the navy blue collar and paid $100 for...don't fucking ask me...cause i will tell you that it may just be the ugliest fucking dress i have ever seen and yes, it does make your ass look big...dont show me a picture of your buck toothed 3 year old and say"isnt he cute?"..cause i will say..."man,i hope he has a big dick..cause with those gaps in his teeth he's never going to get a girl on looks alone"...im not trying to be mean...you asked me what i thought...dont get pissed when i told you ...along with my inability to keep my mouth shut .i also have the inability to lie...i cant lie for shit...my daddy found out at an early age that i was a lousy liar.."jackiesue..did you jump off the chicken coup and beat larrywayne in the head with a 2x4?"...
"uh...no daddy, uh...well, maybe i ..was..well, uh...yes, by god i did but he had it coming" so by the time i was 11-12 all daddy had to do was say "jackisue, look me in the eye and tell me the truth." hell, i would freak out and confess to shit i had done in the first grade..now my inability to lie for myself does not transfer to telling a lie for friends.hell i can lie like a sonofabitch for my friends..."why fred, how could you think that mac would sleep with your wife while your at work? hell, mac was with me up at the bar til midnight and then we went to waco to ihop for breakfast(my second lie..i never went for breakfast after drinkin' all night long..who wants to spend $30 to build up a good drunk and then go spend $3 to kill it..)i think mac had eggs and sausage with hash browns and i had eggs over medium with bacon and grits...we also ran into ruth and slim..you remember slim he ran that truck stop up in ross, fat bald chewed the cigars?"..hell, by then their eyes would have glazed over and rolled back in their head...yup...lie like a sonofabitch for my friend.."jackiesue where were you between midnight and 2am?"..."fucking yo boyfriend.bitch"...

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH


JUST SPENT 30 MINUTES POSTING AND THE MOTHER FUCKER WOULDNT POST..KISSSSSSMYASSSSSSSSS...FUCKERS..KNEW IT WAS TOO GOOD TO LAST..THINK IM GOING TO GO HOME AND MAKE SOME "KILLER CHILI"...WILL TRY AND REPEAT POST MONDAY..IF IM NOT IN JAIL FOR TAKING OUR MY ANGER ON SOME OLD FART CZECH DRIVING 11 MILES A HOUR DOWN THE DIRECT MIDDLE OF REAGAN STREET..FUCK ME TILL I SURRENDER IN FRENCH..

*Note: Reference is to new owners that took over Blogster and made it suck ass

Thursday, October 13, 2005

BYEBYE, YA'LL SEE YA SAT AM..

cant believe that blogster is working..shhhh...it has been 3 hours...and no fuck ups...so can go home and not kick rocky across the floor..that fat little tuna fish eating horney little bastard..rocky's motto.."my yard...fuck or fight"....going to go home and fix me a nice bowl of spinach, tomatoes, cuces, and yogurt dressing with some decaffinated icetea...fuck me til the cows come home..i win the lottery first thing im doing is getting that belly thing done..where they cut out and tie it off..second thing im going to do is find my first husband and kick his ass...just for the hell of it...byby..see you sat. am..hope this fucker is still working...

MY BEST FRIEND DAVID


both of us like to watch nsci or what ever the letters are..i cant remember the csi's nypd,etc..anyhow the next night after it came on he called me and asked me what happened that night on the show as he was trying to watch it but was "busy"...so i gave him the up date and said" so you were busy, huh, is that hip talk for i was getting laid"? and he laughed and said yes...said you lying sonofabitch..you didnt want an up date on the show, you just wanted to brag about getting you pipes cleaned...he actually giggled..men, so strange..
hell, i havent had sex in so long that if and when i did, no one would have to wonder or guess, because the guy would be screaming "get off, quit, im done...stop..no more..oh god, no more"and i would be laughing like a banshee....

SHHHHHH...COME CLOSE...I HAVE A SECRET TO SHARE WITH YOU..

I THINK BLOGSTER IS WORKING AGAIN..I HAVE BEEN ON FOR OVER AN HOUR AND IT HAS BEEN ZIPPING RIGHT ALONG...BUT DONT TELL..IF THEY KNOW ITS WORKING..THEY WILL FUCK IT UP AGAIN...SHHHHH...

DIPSHITS AND INCORPORATED...AKA NEIL AND BOB, BEVUS AND BUTTHEAD...ASSHOLES


read all the posts and decided it might be more fun just to stay here and call them stupid names..make fun of their manhood(if any),poke fun of their religion and politics..just be what i am...a pain in the ass..and what cracks me up is...i get this email from barbara and they sent a reply to me...to her...doh...saying they didnt know what i was refering to...WHAT THE FUCK?.. are they held up in some cellar on the moon or what? dont they read thier posts..or read anyone's blogs..judas priest..fuck me every tuesday..i want to check out babs poll..(and sooners, huh huh)about compaints etc..i went to monsterblog.com or something like that i forget and joined up. but only did one post and said i wounldnt stay if i couldnt say fuck...havent heard from them...heehee
so as pissed off as i am..i will continue to come in when i do the library stuff and post and try to read your posts and comment.if not.i will just rant and rave and hold my breath until im purple, throw myself on the floor and kick and scream...works for all those damn kids in the grocery store..which reminds me..does any one watch those fucking super nanny shows? this is why i believe in a small amount of child abuse..i think it is perfectly acceptable to whack your kid in the back of the head if he spits on you, bites you, kicks you or cusses at you..or anyone else..i didnt beat my kids..only because they knew i would if they fucked up...one time mojo and i were in the grocery store, she was about 4..sitting in the basket..behaving herself..and this woman had about 4 kids and they were running all over the store, screaming, crying begging for this thing and another thing..maryjo just sat there and stared at them..finally she looked up at me and said"if i did that you would kill me"...and i looked at her and smiled and said.."and dont you forget it"...i could take those 3 kids any place and they behaved..because they knew if they didnt they would be punished..they said yes mamm, and no sir..thank you and please.. went they were polite..well mannered and i still get comments from people that have known them all their lives about how well behaved they were..that whack in the back of the head...works..now, parents are so busy trying to be "friends" to the kids that they forget to be parents..
when i first got married at the ripe old age of 16 most of the couples we knew were older and were having kids..i would see them coming and just cringe because they were little monsters..always swore up and down when i had kids people would be as glad to see them as they were me..so dont understand why the nanny just doesnt whack them a good one...

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

FUCKIT....


it is 11am..i have been on for 45 minutes..in that time i have read my comments and read soonerfans posts..the rest of the time was spent trying to read others or post.i have not been successful. so folks, im rolling up my bedroll, saddleing my bronco and riding off into the sunset...i may or may not come back..it is just too fucking mind mending to keep pounding my head against the wall here..i may check out another blog site..if i do i will let you know where i am at..if anything changes let me know..but as of now...im out of here... love and kisses jackiesue

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

GORT, KLAATU BARATA NIKTO...

man, i loved that movie...i think i might have been about 7-8 when THE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL came out..and i was in love with gort..not michael rennie.but the robot..he was sooo cool..wanted to be carried off by him...back then you could go to the movie for .50 and watch 5-6 cartoons, a western serial,a tarzan serial, boy of the jungle serial and then the movie..all fucking day long...cheap babysitter...daddy would give me a $1.00 and what ever money i had managed to con out of various relatives and could go to the movie..buy a dr.pepper, popcorn, chicken legs, pink peanut patties and butterfinger for under a buck..the correct name for chicken legs was chicken sticks but we always called them chicken legs...and we also called the pink peanut patties elephant shit..not sure why..maybe because it kind of looked like it came from an elephant? who knows ..we were so dumb back then..of course baby ruth was called dog turds..when i lived on base like hickam afb in hawaii. on sats we could see cartoons all day long for .10..only on saturdays..i never was really big on cartoons so i didnt go all that much..now that i look back on it i think the only time i went was went mother and daddy forced me to go...now i know they wanted me out of the house all day long so they could have sex..i remember watching the queen of england's coronation at the movie theater and being totally blow away by all the jewels..the crown, the furs..the golden carriage drawn by those magnificant horses..all those fancy dudes in the red and gold uniforms..wow..so cool..trying to remember the name of the theater in mesquite, texas that we used to go to..saw my first elvis presley movie there..had to watch it all day long to be able to hear what was being said as the girls screamed all the way thru it..by the 3-4th viewing they were wore out enought that i could actually hear them speaking..but every time HE came on..they would start screaming again..i made a vow that i would never be like those girls..so embarrasing to me. then i heard gene vincent and i was a goner..ahhhhh...oh, the name of the movie theater was the texan...when i lived in mesquite the population was about 1,800..and we were kin to most of them..my grandmother's brother ran the anderson grocery store..and i remember mrs. weeks ran the other little grocery store..alot like the one we have here in west..i remember there was a laundry...was a huge gigantic room full of old metal square tubs..people would bring their laundry in and do them in those big tubs..had big old wooden sticks to stir the clothes around in the tubs..and hot steam was everywhere..must have been 115 degrees in there..remember the smell of bleach and blueing and so strong would make your eyes water..while my grandmother(big mama) would do her laundry every sat. us kids would go to the 5 and dime store..it had wooden floors that creaked when you walked on them..remember the parfum in the dark purple bottle? man it stunk..but it only cost like .25 or less and we bought it up by the truck load..that and witch hazel...remember my aunt estelle telling me and my cousin diane that we smelled like a french 'hor house..and we thought that was a good thing..french parfum, french 'hors..man..it just didnt get any better than that..after we had splashed enough parfum on us we would go to weeks grocery store and buy dr.pepper for .5cents..i remember when it went up to a dime and we were just so irate...diane and i drank dr.pepper and her brother michael ray drank grape nehi...i thought he had a purple birth mark on his upper lip when i was really little .then i saw him all washed up for church one sunday and his birth mark was gone..aunt estelle had washed the grape nehi off...we didnt have tv to keep us intertained and only radio in the house was in daddy red's bedroom..(grandpa) and he was always listening to some game or 'the opry...so we intertained ourselves by playing games outside..we pretended we were people in movies..i was always the black stallion..i read more than the other kids and i was into the black stallion big time..i would prance around the back yard, whinnying, snorting and flipping my hair around like a horse..they would try to rope me and 'tame me'... i would kick the shit out of them..ahhh, the good ole days...

Monday, October 10, 2005

ANOTHER REASON TO SING AND DANCE


sat when i went to the library they had just cataloged a bunch of new books and guess who snatched them up first..yup..me..
frankenstein by dean koontz and read it already and it was farfuckingout...want to read part two now...so good..so so good
tyrannosaurus canyon by douglas preston..reading it now and print is to fucking small but will keep going as its a good book..
love sick blues by william hemphill..about hank williams...cant wait..
flinch by robert ferrigno..like the serries so far another cant wait
marker by robin cook...hot damn..love robin cook
shadows by edna buchanon..????sounded good
midas by russell andrews...?? sounded good
point blank by catherine coulter..like her books...so hopefull
blown...by rancine mathew...wonder if it is about sex or drugs??

does anyone in texas my age remember the great radio shows? do you remember big john and sparky? i loved big john and sparky..got to go to some grocery store and see them when i was about 7 years old and was heart broken to find out sparky was a dummy..thought he was a real kid..fucking radio..
and my favorite..the b bar b riders...man, i miss radio shows...inner sanctum...the shadow..lone ranger. man..better than tv..
and another reaason to celebrate at sooner's...they have put in the 34-year old machine that maded the first frozen margaritas into the smithosian's national museum of american history..how cool is that..
poem i wrote after the game:
i would happily croak
from a stroke
to see the eagles back broke
by the cowboys...


ok, so im no poe...

ISN'T LIFE JUST FUCKING BEAUTIFUL???


do a little dance...make a lot of fuss...get down tonight...
joy to the world...and all the boys and girls..joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea, and joy to you and me...
yessir, rebob, buddy boy,howdy..i do mean wow...
THE COWBOYS WON...THEY KICKED ASS...THEY STOMPED THEM FUCKING EAGLES..HANDED THEIR ASSES TO THEM ON A TRAY..A SILVER FUCKING TRAY...I WANT A 40X45 INCH PICTURE of MAC NABB'S FACE IN MY LIVING ROOM...NO..RIGHT OVER THE SINK SO WHEN I TAKE A DUMP I'LL BE LOOKING AT THAT PEICE OF SHIT QUARTER BACK...
hoo boy..life is good..he looked just like a 6 year old that some one took his favorite toy away from..and he desperately wanted his mommie..fucker....
can you tell that im in a great mood? no saying that im in a great mood is like saying the great wall of china is a picket fence..im over the moon..best game the cowboys have played in at least 5 years..except for that fucking roy williams who had two flags thrown on him for either off sides or illegal block...cost us a touch down..dipshit..plus the fumble that k. johnson made..but what was the deal with the name calling finger pointing on the side lines between bledsloe and johnson? that was really inspiring..fuckers..speaking of bledsloe..he threw for 289 yards. and 3 td's..not bad for an old fart...
and to make it even better so far im 41-27-1 for the season...
this is going to make it awfully hard to be pissed and bitching about anything...but i assure all of you...i will think of something..like fucking blogster is back being slower than bush's brain...

Saturday, October 08, 2005

I SPOKE TO FUCKING SOON


SONOFABITCH, MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN,COCKSUCKING FUCKING ASSHOLE, BUTTWIPE DICK HEADS...BLOGSTER IS BACK TO SLOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW AGAIN. FUCK ME SIDEWAYS...LUCKY FOR SOMEONE THAT THE LIBRARY IS CLOSING AND I HAVE TO LEAVE OR I WOULD LEAVE SUCH A MEAN ASS COMMENT ON NEIL AND BOB'S WEBSITE...FUCK YOU YOU, YOU......YOU......YOU..FUCKING FOREST GUMP LOVING REPUBLICAN RIGHT WING WING NUT ....BOOGER...

HAVE A NICE WEEKEND..GO SOONERS...SEE YA MONDAY..

WOMAN OFF FLIGHT AFTER TSHIRT FLAP


i bet she had on the same tshirt that ruby rocks told me about and i want...the bush and cheney fucking the world tour...2004...maybe not.. anyhow..
reno nevada..
a woman was booted off a southwestern airlines flight for wearing a tshirt that bore an expletive and images of president bush, vice president dick heney and secretary of state condolezza rice.
lorre heasley of woodland, wash. said she planned to press a civil-rights complaint against the airline over turesday's action at reno-tahoe international airport, a stoover point on ms. heasley's scheduled trip from los angeles to portland, oregon.
I have cousins in iraq and other relatives going to war", ms heasley told the reno gazette."here we are trying to free another country, and i have to get off an airplane, over a tshirt. that's not freedom."
sw airline spokeswoman marilee mcinnis said several passangers complained about the shirt.
ms. heasley, a 32 year old saleswoman, said passengers began complaining after she and her husband, ron, moved to the front of the cabin in reno.
she agreed to cover the words with a sweatshirt, but when the sweatshirt slipped while she was trying to sleep, she was ordered to wear her tshirt inside-out or leave..she and her husband left. they arrived hom e in a rental car wed. afternoon.
ms. mcinnis said southwest rules allow the airline to deny boarding to any passenger whose clothing is "lewd, obscene or patently offensive."
but allen lichtenstein, a lawyer for aclu in las vegas, said it "might be problemmatic" that the airline "changed rules in the middle of the flight".



well, fuck me...no really..fuck me..

supposedly we're in iraq to bring them the joys and benefits of democracy..to bad we dont have any of it here stateside..this is the biggest crock of shit..makes my rednecked red ass even redder...

ROCKY IN FIGHTING FORM


i have never seen rocky fight before..have cleaned up his cuts and wounds and patched the holes chewed in his neck and feed him only canned food as he has no upper fang teeth due to his back alley cat fights..but early the other morning i heard the meowwwwwwwwwwww, meowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww, hisss gerrrrrr, meowwwwwww...and turned the porch light on just in time to see rocky kick the living shit out of a cat about twice his size...this cat was huge and rocky had him by the neck and was tossing him left and right and making mountain lion noises..had him in the corner of the yard by the pecan tree and that cat was doing everything he could to get free of rocky..but rocky had him in his yard and was not going to let him get off that easily..man what a asskicking...i finally had to call him off..and he walked back to the porch like leo the lion...his feet barely touched the ground..when he got up to me he smelled of cat piss, not his brand....so i can to clean him up before i could bring him in and give him a saucer of canned milk which he loves..and tuna fish...my hero...took him 45 minutes to lick his balls that night...

FOREST GUMP...NOW THERE IS SOMETHING TO BITCH ABOUT


that little fucker...you know when i saw him making his little speaches during katrina episode...all calm and covering his ass and telling Brownie..you did a good job.? all i could think of was that old saying.." if you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, chances are you dont understand the situation..."....why else is ignorance called bliss....
stupid fucker..

also thought about all the times i have called him a useless asshole and then i realized that i was doing a diservice to assholes as at least they have a usefull function...

HOLY SHIT..BLOGSER IS WORKING

now what will i have to bitch about? oh well, im sure i can think of something...but got on this morning and the little blue square just popped right up and i nearly fell off library chair...there is a goddess. now have to tell neil and bob tanks...

Thursday, October 06, 2005

FRENCH WOMEN DONT GET FAT.


hm...hm....yeah right...just what i need to read or even listen to ...a skinny french women telling me how to eat...hell most skinny french women cant keep their french husbands from cheating on them..yeah, like im going to listen to her.
tell you how my mind is warped..was checking out books while waiting for the blue square to grow and found a book titled one night stand with the king..i thought wow..a book about a quickie with elvis....doh..was about esther and some king of persia..what a dip i am..henrietta has a new helper at the library and she has turned this place into a sparkling and shinny new library...just put out tons of fall decorations...flowers, holloween decorations in the kiddies part of library..looks soo great..
did i tell you that my blood pressure is 140/80 and i lost 4 lbs?...baby steps...baby steps...but i would knock down a 83 year old lady on a walker if it would get me a dr.pepper...and i have been asked not to stand in front of the ice cream section of community grocery and to refrain from whimpering when i walk by the soda pop section..pasty has threatened to make me stand out in parking lot and have them bring me my groceries.. so i will not be tempted...i have asked each cashier to please remember...no matter what i promise or how much money i offer them...not to sell me ice cream, dr.peppr or fritos..
made salt free chinese food for dinner.so guess i will go eat it...oh by the way...all you LOST fans...man is that show good..think the others are canibals?

DOUBLE POSTING SONSABITCHES


HEY ....HEY...NEIL AND BOB....WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU??? COME OUT COME OUT WHERE EVER YOU ARE....YOU YELLOW LIVERED COWARDS...BUY US LIKE SLAVES, SEND US TO THE SLAVES QUARTERS AND THEN IGNORE US...DIPSHITS..IM NOT AND NEVER HAVE BEEN LONG ON PATIENCE..SO IM STARTING TO LOSE MY SENSE OF HUMOR HERE..FUCKERS..YOU MUST BELIEVE ME CAUSE I ONLY SPEAK THE TRUTH....YA'LL DONT WANT TO PISS US SLAVES OFF...WE WILL REVOLT...WE'LL ALL SHOW UP ON YOUR DOOR STEP WITH FIRE IN OUR EYES AND WHISKEY IN OUR GUTS.(IN MY CASE..DR.PEPPER)....BUT WE ARE NOT TO BE FUTZED WITH...(MY NEW WORD)...SO PLEASE FOR THE GODDESS SAKE..FIX THIS FUCKER...STRONG EMAIL TO FOLLOW..


*Note: Reference is to new owners that took over Blogster and made it suck ass

HOW THE FUCK CAN MARTHA STEWART BE THIS NICE ALL THE FUCKING TIME...??


ok, you win..i held out as long as i could...IM BACK...
but it was fun for a while...but being nice is so fucking hard..its hard...hard work....i understand..o goddess there i go again..
i had more fun out of reading your comments that i did the blogging..although i did get a kick out of slamming tom and katie..those fucking dipshits...looks like ole tommy boy was jumping on something besides oprah's couch...bad boy..bad boy...dont you know it would be karma (and i do belive in karma) if she came down with post partum depression..now that would just make me laugh..but would be too awful...funny yes..but awful..bet the first time she went after him with a frying pan he would be shoving those anti-depressents down her throat..
be on the look out for my library buddy travis..i think his blog site is..fuck the world and leave it to the next kid? or something like that..he is posting as i type..he hates bush as much as i do..and that is what his first post is going to be about..bush short for bullshit..he is the brother of my granddaughter's best friend when they were kids..i used to call her my black grandaughter..she is a mommie now...and lives in abilene..he is a good kid and we became computer buddies here at the library...so look for him..
i see that kinky frienman is pumped up his war wagon and saying pithy statements as he makes his run for governor..i would like to vote for him but its hard to get me to trust anyone that voted for bush..sorry all you bush voters...but you shoulda know better...
man, the weather here is soo cool..i love it..jenny called me from waco and bitching cause she was freezing her butt off..had shorts and tshirt on..said dont you listen to the weather..long pause..."grandma..im 18 why would i be watching the tv for the weather report.?"..good point..
i see some small progress in the speed of blogster..its down from a 7 minute wait to a 3 minute wait...better than a poke in the eye i suppose..anyone heard from them yet? well, going to try and read some posts..

THAT SWEET BOY TOM CRUISE AND THE LOVELY KATIE ARE EXPECTING A BABY


now as a good spirited person enjoying the cool texas weather I only wish them the very best and will not cast aspersions on their character by having a baby with out the bans of marriage being said over their sweet little selves...that would be sooo not nice..and i can only wish that she does not suffer from the dreaded post partum desease that that sweet boy tom says does not exist..because we all would be just so sadden to hear that she did experience it and because of his feelings about taking those nasty old pills for depression..went complety over the pretty little edge and cut up his cute little body into small little peices..now my goodness that would be just a shame..tsk tsk.. tsk..
well, i have to run now and go tend to the sick and infirm as those poor people need all the help they can get. their sickness and fraility is just such a sad thing..not being able to do the simplest things for themselves...like clean themselves ..why the smell is just terrible...and all that dribbling of food, why it is just heart breaking..such a sad state those poor people have let themselves fall into...they are such a mess that sometimes i actually will gag and hold my nose at them.. which is why i always wear plenty of sweet smelling perfume..im sure those poor people really do appreciate it...they have so little and need so much..why just the other day mrs. barbara bush said they should be so lucky to have a hurricane wash away their homes with all their belongings..just so they could come to the wonderful cool state of texas where we can take care of them..they are just so lucky to have someone just like barbara and i to make them feel welcome and right at home...toodles for now my sweet dear friends...think happy thoughts and do kind things for the less fortunate....

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

SUNSHINE AND MOONBEANS TO YOU ALL


well, the weather in our great state of texas is now turning into the lovely cool times that we all have been yearning for..yes, good citizens of the world...fall has fell. its a good thing...i cant even begin to tell you what a lovely feeling it is to not have our nice cotton clothing stick to our not so sweet smelling skin.the birds are chirping, the breeze is blowing and all is right in the lovely world that the goddess has blessed us with...isnt that special...good times are here again you sweet lovely people...yes, eveything is just hunky dory...blissful i would even say...why the world is such a wonderful place to be right now..i cant imagine anything that would change my little happy happy white fluffy clouds into dark thunderstorms..no my good people.it is a lovely day in the neighborhood...wont you be my friend? lets hold hands and skip down to the lake and feed bread to the little duckies...because when its this nice in texas all is good in the world....so ta ta good people..im off to spread hope and joy to all that i meet. toodles...

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

OK, IM GIVING UP AGAIN

going to go buy a dallas paper and go home and watch the news..tired of sitting here..making me nuts..i read one post and never could get it to come up again so i could read any body else..so fuck em all but six and save them for pall bearers..going to the house..if you dont hear from me wed..10-3pm...i will be back thursday 3-7pm..maybe it will unclog by then...hugs and kisses...jackiesue

COUNTRY MUSIC TELEVISION


on oct. 14th...country music tv will telecast previously unseen video of johnny cash, willie nelson, waylon jennings, and kris kristofferson. these were taken from when they were all doing the highwaymen..and since two of these great legends are gone would be nice to see them sing and get it done...weird..willie is the oldest and think he will out live all of them...only one left is kris and hell, i'd put my money on ole willie anytime over kris..if i can find anyone around here that has will watch it and tape it for me i would be a happy camper..think david oden has vcr and would watch it with me..i have vcr but no cable..i always tease him when i ask him to do something for me by promising him a blow job..he will freak me out one of these days when he says ok...ha..that will be the big one elizabeth...
did i tell you i met willie once up front and in person? when they had the outlaw concert back in the 70's they had it on the steiner ranch where i lived and i worked at the "lodges" and all the guys that were building the stage and what ever would come down and i would get them drunk and take their money on the pool table..met willie's 1/2 brother doyle and he said he would introduce me..i was more interested in waylon but who cared..not them..anyhow after the concert doyle took me to willie's trailor where i remet the head of the bandido's vic..who had become my new best friend when i had found his wallet and gave it back to him with over $3,00 in it..he was passed out and willie was sitting at kitchen table..imbibing...will not say with what...but he was not eating cereal..i had heard how nice and sweet etc. that he was..well, maybe when he wasent imbibing...it was hi ..dont let the door hit you in the ass on the way out..really disappointed..doyle kept saying he was so sorry, willie wasent usually like that...maybe it was my "fuck rednecks" tshirt...oh well...still want to see the show...or get a tape of it...

DEAR NEIL AND BOB(new owners)


man oh man...you guys really have some big Balls. i sit at my computer all humped over like some crone waiting for that little blue square at the bottom of the screen to span until it reaches the end...and after 7 minutes or so...success..and i hear thru comments on my blog that it might take 30 60 days to fix it...and ya'll have the nerve to talk to us about paying to belong to the blogsite...boy howdy...yas, master we be good slaves...
when i first got the idea to start blogging i had no clue what it was about what to do or how it was going to turn out..i really started so i would have a place to vent about shit that pisses me off (george w bush) and hopefully in the process..piss some rightwing republicans off...that was my dream my goal..what i found was a family...friends who are like my own...people that make me laugh, make me think, make me even change my mind about things..(not often) hell, im rooting for oklahoma...how weird is that..i have actually found and made friends with some of them republicans..not the right wingers but just regular old republicans..my kind of republicans...like barry goldwater republicans..blogging became my day... i couldnt wait to find something weird, funny, sad or something to piss someone off..i found obscure quotes, funny articles..made up silly stories(hey I dont have a life that i could intertain you with the shit that happens around me normally)I found that the first thing i thought about when i woke up (right after i peed) was did i have all the stuff i had gathered up the night before in my purse to take to the library so i could share with my "pals"...and things went pretty fucking smoothly...sometimes the old blogster was slower than two old people fucking..but it wasent so bad that you couldnt live with it..and it made me happy...and im into making old jackiesue happy...life has not been a barrel of laughs...but i had found something that fucking made my day...and now...inter...neil and bob or what ever the fuck their names are..now im sure they are perfectly nice people and had all intentions of making this a money making proposition for them selves..power to the people..but their buying blogster has fucked up my little wet dream...now i sit at the computer and wait for 7 minutes to read one post by one person...then 7 minutes to make a comment...7 minutes to read another post...i have been here today since 3pm and it is 4:20pm and i have posted this the one about the dog and read my comments on my posts...that is all...so what this boils down to ...is there another blogsite that we all can join and still be together and say fuck...since it takes forfuckingever to read comments email me
going to try and read some of your posts...



*Note: Reference is to new owners that took over Blogster and made it suck ass

BOBBIE THE WONDER DOG OF OREGON


does anyone read the comics like i do? i love the dallas morning comics even if they have changed the format into a magazine section and the characters look like the are little blurs...anyhow does anyone read get fuzzy by darby conley? it is about a insane monkey killer(in his dreams) siamese cat named bucky and a dumber than dumb dog(is feeling shakey now that he found out he was born in canada) satchel and onwed by rob who is always being fucked over some how by the cat and hugged alot by the dog..so this past week his comics have been about info on cats...but yesterday it was about bobbie the wonder dog from oregon..
from august, 1923, to febuary, 1924, a scotch collie-english shepherd mix named bobbie made perhaps the most incredible documented journey to return home. while visiting indiana, bobbie was chased away from his owners by a pack of local dogs. after 3 weeks of searching, his family was forced to return to oregon without him, broken-hearted. exactly6 months later, bobbie walked back into his hometown of silverton, oregon. tired and emaciated, he had traveled somewhere around 3,000 miles on foot.through icy rivers snow storms and over huge mountain ranges. as his story became known, his owners received many letters from people who had seen and/or helped bobbie along his cross crountry journey.

now that is such a great story about the heart of dogs..but what really struck me and put the fear of god into me was..my first husband lives in oregon..what if he shows up on my door step like that...he is a dog after all...

Monday, October 03, 2005

ONE LAST SHOT AT FOREST BEFORE I GO

went to aol to check my mail and saw where bush aka forest gump has picked another unqualified person for one of his jobs...the new judge..who has never been a judge before..fuck then hire me ....so I would like to say this about forest's picking of people for his cabinets or posts...george w bush should be allowed to pick only two things...his nose and his ass..and before he does either some one should be hired to point out to him the benefits of using one finger for each pick...and not to use one finger for both picks...cause you know he will...

ITS LIKE STANDING ON MY HEAD...CAUSE MY SMILE KEEPS SLIPPING OFF MY FACE


I am so pissed my back teeth hurt from my gritting them...I arrived here at the library at 3pm it is now 5:45 and all I have done is post.. why? because when I tried to read anyone's blog or leave a comment..it takes 7 fucking minutes..so I sit here like a camel chewing my cud waiting for blogster to work...and does it?fuckno....I left a comment on neil and bob's blog to let them know im not a happy camper..and I really dont feel like the give a shit...personally..last friday I got pissed and finally left without reading anyone's posts...and same thing sat...so I thought over the weekend that they would have "worked out their little kinks" as they called them..right...well, they didnt ..it still is not working..and I know it is not the computers here because I can get on aol, yahoo and other web sites without any problem at all..the only time I have problems is when Im on blogster...am I the only one that is having this problem? maybe they are tired of my bitching and a whining and are trying to make me leave or get so pissed that I will make some threat toward them and they can toss my fat ass out of here..what ever is going on..it is starting to wear on me...so Im not sure I will be back tomorrow or not..cause there is no sense in my getting on to blog and to read blogs if I cant do either...


*Note: Reference is to new owners that took over Blogster and made it suck ass

.............OLIO...............


decided to listen to my favorite golden oldies radio station over the week end instead of watching cooking shows on tv..and noticed something..they dont, or at least I have not heard them play any thing by Gene Vincent...anyone remember him..."wear my ring around your finger?"...oh man, when I was about 12-13 I had the most humungous crush on him...and mainly because I had gotten a crush on the school bad boy...I cant remember his name to save my soul but it was at Del Valley high school in austin,texas across from bergrstom afb where my daddy was stationed and we lived..he wore white tshirt rolled up and a pack of luckies rolled up in the sleeve..tight blue jeans, boots with taps on them. remember the big old taps we would wear on our shoes? he drove a custom made black ford, dont remember the year but remember it had glass packs..had no idea then what they were but only cool cars had them...so if you wanted to look like you were in the know you always asked if their car had glass packs..he was tall, thin had black slicked hair into a duck tail and when he wore a shirt over his white tshirt he left the collar turned up and the shirt was unbuttoned..man he was hot..and for some unknown reason he thought I was kinda cute..now you must know when I was 12-13 I had nearly the same size boobs I have now..only I didn't weight even a 100 lbs..so my measurements were about like this...38-19-30...I had to wear a brick tied around my neck hanging from the back to keep me from falling on my face and rolling down hills..so I am sure now that what he liked about me were my big mama's...but I was also the only child of a m/sgt...and that meant....touch me...die...I was not allowed to ride in cars with anyone..if anyone wanted to date me..you had to call and get my daddy's permission...then you had to get pass the guards at the gate who were instructed to guard my every move..you would drive to the gate..the guards would check you over..and if your name was on the list they would call my daddy and describe him and then maybe you would get to drive to the house..park and walk me to the teen club or to the movies, or during summer time to the pool..the only places I was allowed to go..on the way I would be spotted by every guy that worked for my daddy, and all the ap's..(airforce police) who would call daddy and give him spot checks on where I was...so he would know how long it took me to get there and if I was going where I said I was...one time I got brave and decided to go off base and go to a movie in town..never made it past the guard shack..they just laughed at me..and called daddy who came and got me..so my romance with my teen idol didnt last long..once he found out I not only wouldnt let him touch the mama's and wouldnt touch him any where below the waist..well, I was history..and to make it worse..he left me for my bad girl girlfriend "peggysue"..I swear to the goddess that was her name..she had mama's almost as big as mine..but she put out...

hmmm. no wonder I ran off and got married when I was 16

COTTON BOWL AT DALLAS

for the first time in memory next weekend I will not be rooting for the Texas Longhorns...due to the affections I hold for "boomersoonerfan78" I will be rooting for the Oklahoma Sooners..may the goddess still recognize me when I croak and go to goddess heaven..

GREEN CHILI AND PORK STEW WEEKEND


I'am trying to be possitive here but it is hard. The cowboys are conspiring to make me nuts..the weather is still hotter than than hell, my pbs channels are still fuzzy and my dallas paper is still fucked up...I know for a fact that it is a republican conspiracy to drive me over the wall out of the garden of west, texas and into the streets of hell.But I refuse to give in to temptation...I will remain calm, I will be strong, I will not go redneck and stomp someone into a mud puddle and then stomp them dry..yeah, right..
so to calm that little crazy person that resides inside of me aching to be set free I decided to cook instead..so I made green chile pork stew..I made enought to feed me for a week at least...huge pot of stew..and boy did I do good..it may be the best batch I have made yet..but did get carried away with the cayanne chili poweder..which I always do..but man I love that stuff..west food mart had roast pork on sale for .99cents a lb. so I bought two of them for under $7. Put one in the freezer and made stew with the other one...I don't have a recipe but can give you the ingredients and you can go from there..I stuff that pork roast full of slivered garlic, put fake salt pepper and flour on it and then heat on all sides in my iron skillet. then add little beef broth to skillet and stick in over low and cook till it is still pink almost red ..in mean time i take carrots, bell peppers, potatoes, onions, garlic, fake salt, pepper, garlic powder,paprika,celery, cayanne pepper, chili powder and beef broth with water and cook like your making stew..then let pork rest and then shread meat into the stew pot(iron also) and cook till all is well...then eat...really good..than almost made up for the fucking cowboys game..but not quite..but miracle of miracles with the exception of the cowboy game and one other I won all the games I had bet on this week end...pretty cool...I just refuse to get crazy over the cowboys..as much as I want to ..I refuse to get taken out by a football game..Im saving my big stroke for when I decide to have sex ...figure that should be the way to go..

Saturday, October 01, 2005

NASTY MEMO'S


well lets see how many people i can piss of this moring..i fially replyed to the "changes" that they said they were going to make in the paper after i bitched...the made one change and that wasent enough..so sent another email to them and was so pissed..called them dickheads again..then after one full hour i finally got into blogster and onto my blog site..so far the only thing i have been able to do is leave a mean spirited comment on eithe bob or neils blog site..to let them know how fucking slow blogster is..i dont have access to computer from thursday at 7pm till sat am at nine and only here from 9-12pm and then nothing again till monday at 3pm..so i have alot of catching to do on sat. am and hard to catch up if you cant even get in the fucking race.for some reason i woke up in a "dont fuck with me, i keep a count on the bodies" mood..actually went to sleep at a semi-normal time last night 12:30am instead of 5-7am..and woke up at nine..so that's what it feels like to get normal amt of sleep..i become a crazy person...huh huh..
now lets see if i can get on others sites so i can leave my pitty comments...

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHFUCKIT...


SEEMS LIKE THE ONLY THING I CAN DO IS POST..I TRIED TO GET ON SOONERS SITE AND AFTE 10 MINUTES I DID, BUT GAVE UP TRYING TO READ HIS COMMENTS AND LEAVE ONE..SO AS BAD AS I HATE TO ..IM GOING HOME..IF I CONTINUE TO KEEP TRYING TO READ PEOPLES BLOGS AND COMMENT I WILL GO FUCKING REDNECK AND STOMP ON SOMEONE'S TESTICLES...AND THE WAY I FEEL RIGHT NOW..DOESNT MATTER IF ITS NEIL OR BOB'S..WHAT IS THEIR NAME..SO ANYHOW FOLKS...IM GOING HOME AND FINISH RAKING MY YARD..DOESNT LOOK LIKE THERE IS GOING TO BE ANY PECANS THIS YEAR..AT LEAST FROM MY TREES..FUCK...SOMETHING ELSE TO PISS ME OFF..I USUALLY MAKE 15-20 OR MORE PECAN PIES FROM THANKSGIVING TO CHRISTMAS..NOT THIS YEAR...WILL SEE YOU MONDAY AT 3PM AND WILL READ ALL YOUR POSTS THEN..SORRY...LOVE AND KISSES JACKISUE


*Note: Reference is to new owners that took over Blogster and made it suck ass