unless your here to dust the nasty lamp..buzz off.
Friday, April 30, 2010
T.G.I.F. ALL YOU WORKING STIFFS
Thursday, April 29, 2010
SINGLES AD FOR YELLOWDOG GRANNY
66 year old Widow looking for just the right one.
height:5'4"
weight:none of your mother fucking business.(plump)
age:66
Race:lily white redneck
religion:pagan
status:widow(will tell you about that at the altar)...Ok..tell you about that..AFTER the altar.
Likes:
Reading(uninterrupted by you, unless the house is on fire.)
Crossword puzzles, after reading the DAM News. Which you are not allowed to touch until I have finished reading. Which means you'll have to read it with the gaps where I have cut out recipes or articles of interest..get over it or get your own paper.)
Football, and this means you have to love the Dallas Cowboys with all your heart and absolutely hate the mother fucking Philadelphia Eagles. This is a deal breaker. If I see even a hint of affection for the Eagles you'll go the way of the last husband. It will be ugly.
Computers, Facebook, Blogging, my Internet friends and games I play on line..Get over it or get your own computer. Change that..HAVE YOUR OWN COMPUTER. While we're at it..you'll need your own TV, radio and automobile. Might be a good idea to have a house with separate bedrooms and baths..Second thought we should probably have separate homes. So you should probably have lots of money.
Like to travel. Which means going to House of Satan (Wall-Mart) once a month. Any farther than Pizza House of West is out of the question.
Minus..vulgar, hardheaded, stubborn, weird sense of humor. I haven't had sex in 25 years and not really interested in breaking the streak..unless your Antonio Banderas. Then I'm sure we can work something out.
Plus...I love to bake, have a big heart, happy 99% of the time. (The one percent usually involves football losses or stupid Republicans.) If I like you or love you I'm always there for you..unless it has to do with the Cowboys(see Eagles) or politics(see republicans).
I know your out there prince charming.. hurry the fuck up...not getting any younger here.
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
STOLEN FROM BOROWITZ REPORT..again
April 28, 2010
Goldman to Employ So-called ‘Douchebag Defense’
Fabrice Tourre to be Exhibit A
NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) – In the event of a criminal case against the banking giant, Goldman Sachs is planning to employ a rarely-used legal strategy known as the “douchebag defense,” sources confirmed today.Davis Logsdon, Dean of the University of Minnesota School of Law, summarized the unorthodox strategy: “Basically, they will be arguing that the Goldman executives had no control over their actions because they are ginormous dicks.”“Exhibit A” if the bank decides to go forward with the douchebag defense will be Goldman banker Fabrice “Fabulous Fab” Tourre.“I think the government would have a hard time arguing that he was not an egregious douche,” Logsdon said.In order to establish Tourre’s douchebag bona fides, Goldman’s lawyers would most likely offer up his emails, his Facebook profile, and several of his ex-girlfriends.Jury selection could also be key to the success of Goldman’s douchebag defense strategy, Logsdon said.“Goldman’s dream jury would be made up of twelve angry dickwads,” Logsdon said. “In New York, that shouldn’t be hard to find.”
Goldman to Employ So-called ‘Douchebag Defense’
Fabrice Tourre to be Exhibit A
NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) – In the event of a criminal case against the banking giant, Goldman Sachs is planning to employ a rarely-used legal strategy known as the “douchebag defense,” sources confirmed today.Davis Logsdon, Dean of the University of Minnesota School of Law, summarized the unorthodox strategy: “Basically, they will be arguing that the Goldman executives had no control over their actions because they are ginormous dicks.”“Exhibit A” if the bank decides to go forward with the douchebag defense will be Goldman banker Fabrice “Fabulous Fab” Tourre.“I think the government would have a hard time arguing that he was not an egregious douche,” Logsdon said.In order to establish Tourre’s douchebag bona fides, Goldman’s lawyers would most likely offer up his emails, his Facebook profile, and several of his ex-girlfriends.Jury selection could also be key to the success of Goldman’s douchebag defense strategy, Logsdon said.“Goldman’s dream jury would be made up of twelve angry dickwads,” Logsdon said. “In New York, that shouldn’t be hard to find.”
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
WEST, TEXAS NEWS
before the West News I have to show you Shady Lane's African drums..Besides the African Drum dance classes she takes she is now learning to play the African drums..she rocks.
The West teams place at District 7-AAA meet.Both the West Varsity boys and girls placed fifth.
The West Trojans boys and girls won their district..in 7-AAA. The JV softball team Lady Trojans also are district champs. They were6-0-1. The boys and girls were both 8-0. The girls are scheduled to play some warm up games as they wait for their Area Playoff games in May. The Trojan guys have a 23-5 season record.
They have a bye the first game for Bi-District and will start playing May 13-15. I hope they go all the way. Baseball is king in West, and we have a World Series player Scott Posednec to prove it.
The West teams place at District 7-AAA meet.Both the West Varsity boys and girls placed fifth.
The West Trojans boys and girls won their district..in 7-AAA. The JV softball team Lady Trojans also are district champs. They were6-0-1. The boys and girls were both 8-0. The girls are scheduled to play some warm up games as they wait for their Area Playoff games in May. The Trojan guys have a 23-5 season record.
They have a bye the first game for Bi-District and will start playing May 13-15. I hope they go all the way. Baseball is king in West, and we have a World Series player Scott Posednec to prove it.
The best news of all is about the Tale Tellers of The West Public Library. You ready for this? They won state-wide recognition when they were honored as the Wayne Williams Library Project of the Year Award, which was presented to them at the Texas Library Association's 97th Annual Conference on April 15 in San Antonio. (Nancy had told me before the girls new and it took every thing I had to keep it to myself)Besides a plaque, the Library was presented $500 to continue the project. See, they had a grant to get it started and run it for a year. Well, when the year was up, the girls went to Nancy and said it was too important and they didn't want to quit ..money or no money. So they did it all on their own, having cake sales, sold confetti eggs at Westfest and did absolutely every thing on their own. The city of West gives them a little but not near enough to cover the cost of the costumes, props, snacks for the kids, etc. This past Saturday someone donated a bunch of huge pots and the girls helped kids plant roses and bushes in the pots and served them cotton candy. I was going to do the cotton candy, but one of the Tale Tellers wanted to and it's their gig, so I let her do it..I think I was back-up if no one knew how to do it. That was for Earth Day. They do something almost every Saturday. I am going to see if I can do the cookies/cupcakes etc. for the snacks when they have it. It can be costly, but hell I bake for everyone any how. But if anyone would like to donate to the Tale Tellers fund of West, By Goddess, Texas..put it in the Annie's donation pay pal and I'll give it to Nancy. When they won the State award, you have to know that they were up against cities like Dallas, Austin, Houston, etc. Many many libraries...and we beat them all. It's really a big deal and I'm so happy and proud of them and grateful for Nancy who got the ball started. The $500 they won didn't go far as Nancy drove them down from West to San Antonio and back plus paid for the 2 rooms. So most of the $500 went for travel expenses. Nancy is a retired school teacher and her wages from Library isn't that much and she can't be expected to foot the bill. The library doesn't have enough money to pay for stuff like that. Our money goes for books, supplies, and Nancy's money. So any help would be greatly appreciated.
West also got a new fire truck for the West volunteers. Estimated cost is $70,000 and will be used mainly to fight grass fires. The city paid for it with money accumulated from fund raisers and donations with the cook off being one of the major fundraisers. I want you to know..for a town this size, we have the best volunteer fire station and fire trucks around..
More good news..Merle took off yesterday to go to Florida to visit his sister. Think it will be good for him, to get away from the house for awhile..Merle loves to travel and T.J. had been sick for a long time and wasn't able to travel, so this is great for Merle. They had a fish fry last Saturday, but I'd had all the fun I could handle for a while.
We had a kick ass storm and at the end of my unit wind broke a huge tree off and fell against the end of apartment. Plus the shingles and wood frame under the roof was ripped up from the wind. Winds were up to 60 miles an hour. Ripped up signs, trees, roofs, etc. Plus beat the crap out of our blue bonnets...but they bounced right back.
I think I have my camera ready to take pictures..still haven't figured out the video camera. But before I do anything..I'm reading the destruction's.
I made home made pizzas tonight..one for me with fresh mushrooms, onions, black olives pepperoni and a ton of cheese. Babs just had cheese and pepperoni..We both agreed..they rocked. Have to go get all the stuf ready for the cooking class tomorrow...Making home made granola and serve it with vanilla non-fat yougurt..I'll let you know how it goes.