I have to admit, the warn a brother cracked the fuck out of me..this will have to hold you until I report back on the bridal shower...
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Friday, June 27, 2008
I HAVE A BLACK BELT IN SHOE SHOPPING
So, I went to Wakko....arghghgh!...Not even 10 miles down I-35 there was a traffic jam..there was a grass fire on side of the road and traffic was backed up from Elm Mott to West..it was a mess..so I said fuckit and got on frontage road and whipped right by them..till I got to where the fire was and had to get back on I-35...sigh*...Finally made it to my insurance office where I had them re-figure my policy and got over $20 reduction by going to another company...and lower payments..Then it was off to Marshall's...was going to go to Payless but I thought bullshit..Lane and I did great on getting shoes for a great price, so I'll go to Marshall's...which I can never remember how the fuck to get there, damn near had to drive to Austin to get turned around in the right direction to the store..My foot is shrinking back to normal size...hot damn..I kept trying on 7-71/2's as that is what I had been wearing..too big..too big...found some cute shoes but had to high of a heel...with my dead feet from pinched nerve I can't wear high heels any more..I'd fall on my ass faster than I used to when I drank...and you're not going to believe this..I found a pair of shoes with a tiny little heel, in the exact color as my top...and it was marked down(marked down like 5 times)...from $39.00 to ..........................$5 fucking dollars...yes, ladies and gents..$5....mother fucking dollars...They are EASY STREET...what ever the fuck that is or means...They hurt like hell as I haven't had my feet stuffed in anything other than tennis shoes and baby phats in for fucking ever...but they look so cute...little square toe with a gold thingy on it...leather and suede...I fucking rock!..$5....can you believe it?...$5.....So to celebrate I bought two books...ha...Low Carb meals in minutes and cooking for your dog...yes, I know..I don't have a dog, but it was only $3 and it might make a great Christmas present for some one....
While I was at that shopping center I thought I would check out A Million Books or something like that..hey, it's a book store..I walked in and all I could smell was the smell of new books....I walked over to the counter and said 'pinch me'...and the girl smiled and pinched me..I said..nope, I'm not dreaming...I'm in a real live bookstore...She and the guy behind the counter just giggled..I am so proud of myself..I only bought 2 books..One is Brethren by Robyn Young..about the Knights Templar(for some reason that subject intrigues me) for $3.97 and The Night Gardener by George Pelecanos...for $3.00(did I mention my shoes only cost $5?)..I popped for the membership card which was $10, but figure I will give it to Nancy so she can go get some cheap books for the Library as they have a ton of great books for up to 70% off...If I didn't have to go to the House of Satan and get Babs diet cherry coke and my key lime water, I would still be there..It's a good thing it's so far away or I'd be camped out there every Friday waving my Family Dollar check at them..I like it better than Barnes and Noble..
I'm posting some pictures...one is of the statue that Billy couldn't figure out what it was and what it was doing...I feel in love with this statue...I've had it for 25+years...it 'spoke' to me..and a picture of our Family Dollar, my drug store Old Corner Drug which naturally is on the corner, Wolfs Bar and Inky closing the back door at Wolf's..West Food Mart and a picture of my chicken fried steak...eat your hearts out...
(I did tell you about my $5 shoes didn't I...eggplant color, little heel, gold thingy on the toe?)
I have to go take my new bra off...my tits are chaffing the skin off my chin....
Thursday, June 26, 2008
WEST, TEXAS 'HAPS
Things are coming along..I finally finished filling 2 large plastic totes(huge suckers)with stuff for Jamie's bridal shower...Holy shit..I bought a lot of stuff...towel sets, spices, condiments, toilet paper, paper towels, coffee maker, can opener, hand mixer, coffee, coffee filters, coffee creamer, a Texas flag, an address/calendar/note book with my address , phone number and email address already in it and on the first note page it says call your grandma..popcorn, bunch of hamburger helpers, cleaning supplies, assorted kitchen tools and hell, I don't know what else..The 2 totes can also be used as laundry baskets when she gets moved in..I got her the Texas flag so she could piss off all the Redskin fans when she gets there..Yup, already I'm starting to stir shit up with them 'skins fans..
I wanted to look good for her party Sunday so I went and bought a top for my new black slacks and a new bra..holy shit...the top is a large.(deep eggplant color)..not 1x or 2x, but a large..and the pants are a size 16..ok, I know that's still big, but when your ass has been shoved into a 2x for years a 16 looks fuckingnear petite..ha..and the bra..oh my Goddess, it's a 48 D....a D...I haven't worn a D cup since I was ..............what ? 11...ha...my tits are so fucking perky...I can damn near rest my chin on them..
So going to go to town tomorrow after I get off work and get some nice shoes to go with it..I don't think my lime green baby phats will go with my new outfit..will take pictures so you can see..I have taken some pictures of West, but I keep forgetting so will try and do them soon...
West paper had some great news...Bold Springs Baptist Church is making hamburgers today and Monday..I didn't get one today and even though I want to I may not get one Monday either..last time I had one it shot my blood sugar up...and it's been so good lately..89-117...
I made another apple/cake cobbler, but this time I did them individually..made them in deep dish pie pan..made 2..and will save the remainder of the cake mix and the can of apples for a later date..Will give Babs one(well less my share..ha) and one to be split between my work and the lady at the other dollar store..Who when I went in Tuesday to get my vitamins said "where's my cookies"...so made her some too. I have been wearing my 'ears'...the listen up hearing device and it works great for when I want to watch video's on computer or movie on my tv..but in the store there are so many different noises that it picks them all up and it's like a disco in my head..Plus the other day the train went by and I screamed bloody murder and jerked them out of my ears..Judas priest..talk about smart...When some one bangs one of the baskets or a kid screams it's like it's right inside my head..and that's freaky..But I can hear the phone ring now..Good news is...Inky still hasn't had anything to drink...the bad news is Anessa stopped smoking and we're all fixing to shove her in front of a train. She's all over Inky like flies on shit, then he comes to work and bitches about her for four hours and I'm about ready to smoke and drink to be able to stand both of them..
We are desperate for rain here..I'm in the process of drying 4 loads of laundry and been walking back and forth and it looks gray out, but the wind is blowing to hard, so it'll just blow it off in another part of Texas.
Some woman(56) was going form Axtel to Leroy the other day and a bull was loose and ran out in front of her car and bye-bye ..killed them both..Really tragic. I sure wouldn't want to be the owner of the bull...I see a lawsuit coming ...Colton Lee Parrish turns 1 year old on April 27th. I had to post his picture..as it's about as cute as you can get. Oh man..I just read the article that goes with it..it's my loan manager from PointWest Bank, Bernie Klish. Wait til I tell her I put her grandkid on my blog. She'll have a stroke..
If your interested in a little home with a business, Leroy Country Store is for sale along with a 3bedroom, 2 bath house for only $135,00. Plus the Village Bakery is still for sale. You can also buy 8 acres of completely fenced land, with a tank, barn and oak trees for $45,000.
The West area girls are invited to a Mother-Daughter Tea Party at the West Community Center.Mothers and daughters are invited to attend this eent to make special memories. Girls will make a crown, play Princess Bingo, and find out what it means to be a princess. (hope no one brings up Charles and Diana)
Last year at this time we had 36.6 inches of rain. So far we've had 14.4 inches of rain...What a difference a day makes..Was going to post some of the pictures I took, but Babs is still napping so will do them next time..
ya'll come back and see us.......y'hea?
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
DON IMUS FUCKS UP AGAIN
NEW YORK (Reuters) - U.S. radio personality Don Imus on Tuesday defended linking a football player's race to brushes with the police as Imus tried to dampen a brewing race controversy over remarks he made one day earlier.
During his breakfast show on Monday on Citadel Broadcasting Corp's ABC Radio Networks, Imus discussed Adam "Pacman" Jones, who was suspended by the National Football League in April 2007 because of his link to a Las Vegas triple shooting.
A colleague of Imus commented on how many times Jones had been arrested since he had been drafted by the Tennessee Titans in 2005, and Imus asked what color he was. Told that Jones is black, Imus responded: "Well, there you go. Now we know."
But on Tuesday Imus said during his show: "Obviously I already knew what color he was. The point was to make a sarcastic point.(bullshit)
"What people should be outraged about is they arrest blacks for no reason," he said. "There's no reason to arrest this kid six times, maybe he did something once, but I mean everybody does something once."(Don Imus is doing what we call in Texas.....covering his ass....Pac Man was arrested because he has a sense of intitlement and is an idiot, and only quit fucking up when he figured out he wouldn't be able to make any money to 'get' into trouble if he didn't shape up...)
CBS Radio fired Imus in April 2007 for referring to the predominantly black members of a university women's basketball team as "nappy headed hos," a phrase combining a derogatory term for coarse, curly hair with slang for whore.(thank you for the discourse in language..like no one in the fucking country knew what it meant when he called them 'nappy headed hos'...)
Civil rights campaigner Rev. Al Sharpton said he found the inference in this week's remark by Imus "disturbing." He said his National Action Network lobby group had been monitoring Imus' show since he returned to the airwaves in December.(Al Sharpton is a asshole, and no one actually cares what he thinks)
"I find the inference of his remark disturbing because it plays into stereotypes. Any use of stereotypes is always counterproductive," Sharpton said in a statement. "We will determine in the next day or so whether or not his remark warrants direct action on our part."(Excuse the fuck out of me..but who died and made him judge and jury?)
Jones, 24, recently signed with the Dallas Cowboys and was cleared this month to begin practicing with the team.
Where he announced he wanted to be called by his given name as Pac Man had a bad connotation to it....duh!..ya think?
I think Don needs early retirement and I hope Adam Jones has really cleaned up his act, cause if he fucks up my Coyboays with any off the field activities..I will hunt him down and tap dance on his forehead and cotton eyed joe on his ribcage...
fuckme till I penetrate the end zone.
Monday, June 23, 2008
Saturday, June 21, 2008
CHRISTIANS..gotta love 'em
A grumpy old man walks into a local First Baptist Church and says to the secretary, “I wanna join this fucking church.”
The astonished woman replies, “I beg your pardon, sir. I must have misunderstood you. What did you say?”
“Listen up, dammit. I said I want to join this fucking church!”
“I’m very sorry sir, but that kind of language is not tolerated in this church.” The secretary leaves her desk and goes into the pastor’s study to inform him of her situation. The pastor agrees that the secretary does not have to listen to that foul language. They both return to her office and the pastor asks, “Sir, what seems to be the problem here?”
“There IS no fucking problem!,” the man says. “Looky here, I just won $200 million bucks in the fucking lottery and I want to join this fucking church to get rid of some of this fucking money.”
“I see,” said the pastor. “And is this bitch giving you a hard time?”
The astonished woman replies, “I beg your pardon, sir. I must have misunderstood you. What did you say?”
“Listen up, dammit. I said I want to join this fucking church!”
“I’m very sorry sir, but that kind of language is not tolerated in this church.” The secretary leaves her desk and goes into the pastor’s study to inform him of her situation. The pastor agrees that the secretary does not have to listen to that foul language. They both return to her office and the pastor asks, “Sir, what seems to be the problem here?”
“There IS no fucking problem!,” the man says. “Looky here, I just won $200 million bucks in the fucking lottery and I want to join this fucking church to get rid of some of this fucking money.”
“I see,” said the pastor. “And is this bitch giving you a hard time?”
Friday, June 20, 2008
COULDN'T RESIST
The Blind Mans Blonde Joke
A blind man and his guide dog enter a Bar and find their way to a bar stool. After ordering a drink, and sitting there for a while, the blind guy yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"The bar immediately becomes absolutely quiet. In a husky, deep voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something. The bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde and I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb. blonde with a black belt in karate. What's more, the woman sitting next to me is blonde and she's a weight lifter. The lady to your right is a blonde, and she's a pro wrestler.Think about it seriously, Mister. You still wanna tell that joke?"The blind guy thinks a moment and says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
A blind man and his guide dog enter a Bar and find their way to a bar stool. After ordering a drink, and sitting there for a while, the blind guy yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"The bar immediately becomes absolutely quiet. In a husky, deep voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something. The bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde and I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb. blonde with a black belt in karate. What's more, the woman sitting next to me is blonde and she's a weight lifter. The lady to your right is a blonde, and she's a pro wrestler.Think about it seriously, Mister. You still wanna tell that joke?"The blind guy thinks a moment and says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
.......THE BEAR.......
"He's an old blind bear....alone in the winter woods...with only the smell of his breath for comfort. To mean to die, to lost to care. But show some caution....he's still the bear."
I included this poem in a post about the bear a couple of years ago...maybe not that long...But I received an email from some guy saying he was trying to find the poem, that he knew it had been recited by Robert Blake years ago on the Carson Show..and when he googled it..the only thing that came up was my blog..So I sent him the poem about the bear..Which I have always felt could have been written about me...Any how I decided to repeat it for you newbies..It's a good little poem..
I included this poem in a post about the bear a couple of years ago...maybe not that long...But I received an email from some guy saying he was trying to find the poem, that he knew it had been recited by Robert Blake years ago on the Carson Show..and when he googled it..the only thing that came up was my blog..So I sent him the poem about the bear..Which I have always felt could have been written about me...Any how I decided to repeat it for you newbies..It's a good little poem..
Babs and I went to Pizza House to honor the age old Druid tradition of Summer Solstice by having Chicken Fried Steak...So ....listen to this..The last time we were there I had a small Chicken Fried Steak, it fucking rocked..($5.99)but I got carried away and ate the french fries and that was baaaaad...I had given Babs a bite of my CFS and we decided the sonofabitch was 'good'...no...'excellent'...So this time we decided it was only a $1 more for the large CFS...thinking it would be one steak just bigger...but nooooooo, it's 2 bigger CFS's and so for a buck more ..we get 2 CFS's..What a country..I got the FF's but gave them to Babs as we got togo boxes and put our extra CFS in the box with the ff's...and I got sauteed mushrooms which were killer..and took my extra CFS and extra mushrooms home and will have them for lunch tomorrow..For $6.99 we got 2 large CFS's ff's and a salad..Life is good!
Babs is letting me use her digital camera, and I am going around town and take pictures of all the places in town you read about..Community Grocery, West Food Mart, The Family Dollar Store, Campensinos Restaurant, Pizza House, the good bakeries, Caritas, The Hardware Store, etc. Go take some pictures of Wolf's, Strickly Country, Jack and Diane's, etc. Should be fun..
Anessa and her oldest son Donald came by with a watermelon the size of a Buick for me ...said I could share it with Babs...yeah, right..Will call her and let her come and get it..It's half of a half and it fits inside of a double sink..$3...Texas, gotta love it..
Remember the lady that had the free book cases for me?..I got an invite to go to a party out at her house, can camp out listen to music, eats and drinks..But as much as I think it would be fun...driving all the way to Crawford is pushing my luck. Snuck in and snuck out without the Secret Service nailing my ass before , don't want to try it again..
I got my new insurance policy today..it was over $50 higher...huh?..So I called and they took my information down and said they would re-figure it and call me back Monday with a new policy...See if I had just went, oh well they raised my insurance and paid it..I wouldn't have the chance to get it lowered...My mama always told me the squeaky wheel gets oiled first..
I'm going to go to some garage sales tomorrow...what do you think?...More books or what?...fuckme till there's a full moon..
Thursday, June 19, 2008
SAME SEX COUPLES SAY "I DO"
if you don't agree with this post
Del Matin,87, and Phyllis Lyon,84 were married by San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom on Monday. They have been together for over 50 years...Longer than Elizabeth Taylor, Joan Collins, Mickey Rooney, Jerry Lee Lewis, Robert Evans, Zsa Zsa Gabor, Billy Bob Thornton, Lana Turner and Geena Davis...all who have been married more than 5 times each in the 50 years that these two ladies have been together...If anyone is going to destroy the sanctity of marriage, it's them folk...I am overjoyed that they are allowed to marry...I just wish that they didn't have to go to so much trouble to make sure their partner is protected when one of them passes on...They've been together for over 50 years, but can't be on each other 's insurance plan, or get any of the benefits that a married couple is allowed to. When you have people that are serial brides or grooms and they can get all the benefits allowed by the government..it fucking sucks..Like our friend Kevin and R. who have been together for over 18 years and they can't get insurance for the other one...they are the proud and loving adoptive parents of 4 brothers and sisters, who they rescued from a terrible life, yet they are not legal parents. It's wrong wrong wrong..So I am hoping that Calif. will allow the gay marriages to stand, and that eventually it will be a federal law for all states, for all of our citizens..who if we are truly to be created equal, then we should all have equal rights..
So I raise my Dublin Dr Pepper bottle to the lovely brides and wish them best wishes and Goddess blessings....