Saturday, May 31, 2008

STUMBLE THERE, STUMBLE HERE


















I think this one is my favorite of allllll of them....

Friday, May 30, 2008

WEST, TEXAS NEWS

Lots of news coming out of West, by Goddess, Texas this week...I'll start with the bad news...One of Inky's best friends died..He was 42 years old and Inky and him have been best friends for better part of their lives..Over memorial day he and his mother had come in and she was laughing about dragging his ass out to the cemetery to clean, mow, weed, etc. on the family graves..He had a little trailer out on his mother's land and he always came to the house in the morning for breakfast..when he didn't show she went and checked on him and he was dead..She is really in bad shape..She thinks she killed him by making him work in the cemetery all day in the hot sun. But he's 42, who would think that would do you in? Inky was one of the pall bearers and was in really bad shape last night..The funeral was today and he was really sad and not his normal give a shit self..Inky's 44 and I'm sure he's thinking this isn't how it was supposed to end for Chuck..Last night after work I went by Wolf's where I knew he and Anessa would be to see how he was doing..Getting drunk...and can't say I blame him..Maryjo had called from San Francisco as she had heard the news and she and Chuck were good friends too. The only part of the night(I stayed about 30 minutes) was I got to see a ton of friends I hadn't seen in years..Even living in a town this small, I don't see them as they still drink and party and I don't..Wish you could have seen the looks on their face when they asked to buy me a beer and I said I don't drink any more and haven't in 17 years..I got to see a good friends kid who is one of Jenny and Jamie's best friends..and for a while thought he was going to be one of those drug deaths..He's doing terrific..Asst. manager at a store and doesn't even drink..I was going to stick around just to catch up but....as much as I enjoyed seeing them...had no desire to hang around and watch them get drunk...and Inky said today...it got really drunk out last night...Been there, done that and have the swollen liver to prove it..
Enough bad news...the good news is ..Sunday they are having a special memorial reception to honor Miss Henrietta ....They even are going to hang an oil painting of her right by the check out desk. I will take a picture of it..I just wish they had done this for her so she could have been there ...I will be able to go as I have Sunday and Monday off..or maybe just Sunday..I'm still debating as I am now officially the day 'girl'....Tom fired A. today when she came in an hour late with out calling and letting anyone know...and brought her kid with her....??? What the fuck?....anyhow, it went easier than Tom thought...I think she thought she was bullet proof...
But the best part of the day is...I have started to corrupt Tom...hahahahah!Today some lady let her 3 year old kid have a full bottle of Sprite and when the kid started pouring it all over the floor got 'snippy' with Tom when he told her to take the kid and the drink outside..she said it was too hot and her little darling needed the drink...and Tom pointed at his face and said 'Does this look like a face that cares.'.....She got mad and took the little darling home...When Tom told Inky and I the story I almost fell on the floor laughing...Yup...it's working...I'm corrupting him..
This is graduation week in West. We have 122 kids graduating...and our kid Frito is one of them...His picture is so cute...He has more hair now but it's still short..I gave him my phone number and told him...'do not....do not..under any circumstances..get into a car with anyone who's been drinking or if you have. Call me and I will come and get you take you home, and take you to get your car the next day..No questions asked and I won't tell your Mama...'...he promised he would...He is such a great kid...and doesn't seem to care that I call him Frito either..

More West news?...I'm so excited...Community Grocery has their own bacon on sale and liver is on sale too...The bacon is usually $3.60 a lb. and it's on sale for $2.59...it's the best bacon in the world...and liver's on sale for .89 cents a lb. I'm going to make a big batch of it..some for me, some for Inky and some for the granddaughters mom...We all love our liver and onions..and no one else in the family does..
We have some great deals on houses here. This is one ad:"all you have to do is move into this superbly maintained homel. Beautiful landscaping all around. 2 bedroom,2 bath, appliances, built-in flat screen TV, green house, storage building and above ground swimming pool. $98,500."
Dang....and another:"Very nice older home with very spacious rooms, nice wood floors, large lot and big back yard. Guest house included. Priced to sell at $69,900."
Plus you can buy a 1999 Chevy Camaro for $4,500 and get a free border collie mix for free..
My garden is growing like crazy thanks to all the rain ...Hope to be able to fry me up some okra soon..
Annie dug into the dumpster and brought home a huge piece of cornbread and ate every bit of it..No wonder she won't eat canned friskies...
Guess that's about all from West...I'm going to do a stumble upon post soon and then I think it's time for the Goddess to answer some questions.
It's almost midnight..have to hit the hay...in the immortal words of Billy Pilgrim..."I love you sonsabitches."
Ohhh, before I forget...some kids from the high school came in the store a couple of weeks ago and wanted to ask questions and put it on tape for their class...they asked Inky if they could ask him a question..he said ..'sure'....so they said (camera rolling) "What is magnesia?"...and with out blinking an eye or a seconds pause Inky said "Ain't it that white stuff you put on white bread and baloney?".....I love that boy..

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

PICTURES FROM WEST, TEXAS

had to go back and put this one in..I forgot it..thanks babs..geez, we do look like mother and son..ha..how strange..his momma Agnes would laugh her ass off over this...
anessa and jackiesue
my mothers day display with the tacky underwear next to it..hehe..
my tits in the late show online t-shirt with obama stickers.

buddha picture..
my flowers and front porch.

F. U. sign on door.

inky before he shaved and dyed his hair to match me..ha..



inky and anessa

CANADIANS, GRANDDAUGHTER AND WALMART, oh my!

Three days off ......whee!...Today is the last of my three days off...and lots have happened(but not my laundry)..Yesterday I got a 'play it forward' form Rox in the frozen north of Canada...I had forgotten she was sending it and when I opened my little mail box I thought 'what the fuck?'...Then I opened it up and saw who it was from...There was a white poncho with Canada all over it in red, a scarf with Canada all over it, a small candle(that I have already lit and used up)a CD of Rox's favorite Canadian singers like Rose Cousins, Matt Mays, Matt Andersen, Jann Arden, Chantal Kreviazuk, and Wide Mouth Mason(who couldn't love someone named Wide Mouth?)..I've been so busy I haven't had time to play it, so will do it Sat. and Sun. morning before I go to work in place of my Gregorian Chants..She said if I didn't like it, it doubles as a coaster... There was some gum and a candy bar along with an assortment of maple leaves and little Canadian flags..Since I couldn't eat the candy bar I gave it to Babs who gave it a thumbs up..I will play this forward by asking 3 people to send me their address and I will send them a play it forward ....So thank you very much Rox for my little Canadian Care Package..
Babs and I went to Pizza House for lunch and it doesn't matter if I order pizza or Cheeseburger or Chicken Casadia, mine comes 30 minutes after Babs meal..I have come to the conclusion that the cook is the wife of some one I got drunk and fucked 20 years ago..because no matter what I order...Babs is half way through eating her meal before mine gets there..We had just walked in and the skies opened up and the rains came..Thunder, lightning and lots of rain. We ate and scurried back home and then I went to library and found out that Nancy had already ordered the 3rd Dexter book for me...How cool is that?...Also got Small Favor by Jim Butcher, T is for Trespass by Sue Grafton, Sea Change by Robert B. Parker, The Killing Ground by Jack Higgins, Lost Souls by Lisa Jackson, Hollywood Crows by Joseph Wambaugh, The Genius by Jesse Kellerman, and Santa Fe Dead by Stuart Woods...hot dang..now that I have more hours free I will be able to catch up on my reading...Life is good..
Then to top if off Jamie called and wanted to come visit, so I knew something was up...and yes, something was up..She and Harrison got married on her last trip to Virginia..sigh*...Now don't get me wrong, I like Harrison but I still think they are too young and well, fuck...she's got so much time ahead of her to be tied down with a husband..oh well, no one asked me and as hard headed and stubborn as Jamie is, it wouldn't matter anyhow..She has a mind of her own..He did call Thom and ask for her hand in marriage and got her a beautiful ring..She will be moving down to Norfolk in July and will have a real wedding in May of '09..While she was here we spent half the night looking at invitations for her bridal shower, and cakes..She found the perfect invitations...it says :"Bling Bling, she got her ring"....we both thought that was hysterical..She copied and printed out 3 different cakes in the hopes that she can show it to the cake master here in West and she can duplicate it..She stayed til almost one am..it was really great, we laughed and had a great time and since she hadn't eaten we went to Pizza House for dinner...Since I had just been there I just had an order of chicken wings 12 for $5.99, hot damn, they were good...some of the best chicken wings I have ever eaten..I shared them with Jamie, and then she had a spinach pizza and for once...I got mine first...ha..
Then today Babs and I went to Belmead to the House of Satan. We went to H. E. B. first, which is a grocery store like ...Piggly Wiggly, or Krogers, or what ever you have locally...I got a shit load of fish, salmon, perch and tilapia. Since Babs was already starting to have a melt down and needed a cigarette, she went out side and waited ...I found some books on sale...yes, I know what your thinking...I need more books like I need bigger tits, but what can I tell you..I have an addiction..I got The Collected Short Plays of Thornton Wilder Volume II for .99cents, Possessed(about Prince)by Alex Hahn for $2. 99, The Last Light of The Sun by Guy Gavrill Kay(about the Saxons and Celtics) for $2.99, and Judgement Calls by Alafair Burke for $3.99(daughter of my favorite author James Lee Burke)...so I did good.. Then we went to the House of Satan and by the time we got out of there Babs was ready to beat either me or anyone in particular to a bloody-pulp with my frozen salmon. We were there for almost 3 hours and she was freaking out..I had entered some sort of zen zone and kept singing 'sugar in the morning, sugar in the evening, sugar at supper time, so be my little sugar and love me all the time..' and doing a little kick dance...I got 2 months worth of my diabetes meds and got my film out..I got a ton of fresh vegetables came home and made gazpacho..cuces, celery, radish, bell peppers, tomatoes, black and green olives, red onions, carrots, tomato juice and some Tabasco sauce. I just had a bowl for dinner and it kicked ass..I thought about doing the laundry..there is only 2 loads, but after thinking about it for about 39 seconds I said fuckit and took a nap..naps are good...except when fucking Margaret knocks on the door and wakes me up....I swear to Goddess, they will never find her body..I am posting a picture of the living room, with my new recliner, my new curtains and new floor lamp..and Annie who is enjoying it all..The front yard with my flowers in bloom and the beginning of the potted veggies, Me with my then new hair cut(way too short..I look like a dutch tourist), Anessa and Inky(freshly shaved and hair dyed to match mine),My mother's day display with the hot undies, Me and Inky in our matching haircuts and dye job..(we use the exact same color dye, cracked me up) we are at our station...ready to ...fuck around...Jackiesue's tits nestled in the Late Show online Tshirt and the Obama stickers, my Buddha picture on the couch, it is now in my bedroom, where it looks fantastic on the wall.. Inky before he shaved and dyed his hair..and last but not least...my F U letters on the glass door to my apartment. Which evidently ...doesn't keep a mother fucking one of them away..(Jamie thought the N fell off and I had put fun on the door,) when I told her no it stood for Fuck You, she said "GRANDMA..."...which is what she said when I told her about Tom and the blow-job story..She said she says the word schmuck all the time and every time she says it thinks of me..ha. I am such a great influence on her. She looked at all the pictures on my computer and couldn't get over how different I looked in each picture...yup, and have a personality to match each look...So that's about all...I rearranged the furniture in my bedroom and bought a new fan to put in the window so I can turn ac off and use the evening air to keep cool...it's been humid during the day, but the evenings are still cool..so to keep from using the ac all the time, I will give the neighbors a cheap thrill by being able to peek in my window while I sleep.
Now I need to pick 3 people to send a play it forward package too..and to make it fair..I'm going to shut my eyes and pick 3...and they are........oh wow, that was fun...The first one was Camels Back and Forth..yea, my friend Allan..the second one was Kali and the third one was Jan from the Poodle and Dog blog..so send me your address's and I will send you a 'play it forward' gift from West, Texas....Might take me a couple of weeks, I get distracted alot...fuckme I'll never shop again.
I'm going to post the pictures separately..so it will come next..oh oh..damn...I nearly forgot...I spent $50 to fill up my tank...arghhhhhhhhhhhh!....

Monday, May 26, 2008

I'M BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK


Sorry I haven't been here much lately...the job was kicking my ass...So I wimped out and told Tom I wanted to drop back (like I ever worked it) to 20 hours which is what I signed up for to begin with, but started out working 30 hours right off...and as bad as I hate to admit it, and believe me .(ok...I'm an old fart).it pisses me off to admit it..
but I'm to old and in to bad of shape to work 30+ hours..If I didn't have the back trouble, feet trouble, leg trouble and diabetes topped of with the fact that I'm a decrepit 64 years of age, I'd go for it..but fuck it...I'm not ruining my health for Family Dollar..and glory be...I have 3 days off this week...Today, Tuesday and Wednesday. Then went I went to work yesterday Tom asked me if I wanted to keep the same hours (20) but instead of having 3 days off, work M-F, 10-2pm? Which is A.'s shift..I said why, what's up ?...He said he was pretty fucking tired of her taking 1-2-3 days a week off for her kids school activities..Considering she's way behind in her rent(months) and her electric is always on the verge of being cut off, I would think the way to prove your a good mother would not be to take off work to go with your kids on a field trip but to work that day and pay the rent and the utilities..But what the fuck do I know?..So anyhow I think he was going to give her an ultimatum and either she worked her shift or she hit the road..I'm afraid to call and find out for fear they'll ask me to come in..ha...Plus more good news..Remember my friend Debbie the Republican? She worked at the library until Miss Henrietta ran her off?...She's the one that I took with me to Crawford to watch the Michael Moore movie Fahrenheit
9-11...and we had such a good time..She's my only republican friend..as far as I know..Well, Jack and Diane in Marble Falls(friends of Bolish and Blake), but they are more friendly acquaintances than friends..Annny how, she came in the store yesterday and we had a big hug fest and caught up with each others news...she was happy to see me working and wanted to know if they were hiring...I found an application so fast...She's supposed to fill it out and bring it in today...So after she left I called Tom and told him if he was smart he'd fire all of us and hire her..She was the best asst. that the library ever had and Henrietta was so afraid she was going to take her job, she made life miserable for Debbie and at one point after she left there was talk of her suing Miss H. and I think the city of West..I was really torn because as much as I admired what Miss H. has done for the library she was dead wrong in the way she treated Debbie..Only reason she didn't treat me that way was because she knew I wouldn't stand for it and she also knew I didn't want her job..So, having Debbie would be fun..when she was leaving yesterday I laughed and said 'oh we could get in so much trouble working together.'...she agreed...
I just finished talking to Jennifer, she's doing terrific and J. has a job and is working and things are doing good for them...She's so smart and down to earth about things..She said the bills for the apt. groceries, utilities, etc. are exactly $394 a piece...and that's what happens, he pays his half she pays hers..She's also pissed at Lulu who even though she is only a ball of fur thinks she is a pit bull dog and has chewed the paint off the wall in 2 different rooms, is now a biter and attacks your ankles if you sit still long enough..She can't understand how something so little and cute could end up so mean and ornery...ha...Sure glad that it's a puppy she's complaining about and not a baby...Jamie is supposed to be moving to Virginia in July and she and Harrison are getting married. Arghghghghgh, this is going to be tough for me to keep my mouth shut about..bite thy tongue Jackiesue, bite thy tongue...
Oh, and Thom and C. are the only people I know who can go to Maui and have a miserable time. The Hawaiians were rude, the wind blew all the time and yada yada.. Break my heart..
I sent a package of 'stuff' to Mojo for her birthday along with $50 and she was very happy with her 'care package'..I sent it the same day I sent Anne's book on the de-homosexual book. Mojo's got there in 2 days and Anne still hasn't gotten hers...I told her the post office in New Jersey probably saw a package from Texas and assumed there was something harmful in it and was being x-rayed and checked for bombs...This is the latest picture of Mojo.
Hmm, what else..I finally got the 3 book cases up and all the books are out..But lots of them are having to be stacked on top of each other and I don't like that..So I'm thinking I could get one more small book case and put it in the bed room. I still don't have my astrology books, dream books, witch books, pagan books etc. up on a book case. And I have a shit load of them. I have the bottom shelf of the big book case full of records and I could move them and put some books there..I don't know..I just might need 2 more book cases..I plan on giving away most of the children's books..Some of them are old classics and are worth a lot but would rather give them to some of you out there that have kids or grand kids..I will make up a list and post them and then you can choose which ones you want..then I can send them to you..That will empty out at least 2 shelves..sigh* decisions..decisions..



It's been hotter than hell here..the humidity is just awful. It has been 93-97 for weeks. One day we broke a 73 year old record when it hit 97...If it's 97 in May, what the hell is it going to be like in August?..Holy shit!...Westfest will be miserable...Hot and dry and humid...feck!..By the way I scanned the little flyer we put out each year for Westfest, so you could see what you'll be missing.



I have okra, squash, cantaloupe, eggplant, tomatoes, my herbs, onions, asparagus, and chives growing like gangbusters..oh and peppers ...jalapenos and the little twisted red ones..One ripened already and used it on chicken and like to have tore me a new one..Tiny but lethal..
I should have a good adventure tale to relate after Wed. as Babs and I are going to go to the House of Satan for our drugs and our big shopping..We're going to go in together on some of the things we can buy in large amounts, like toilet paper, paper towels, a flat of eggs, etc. and since we both hate the fucking place we should be able to make it a fun adventure..making life miserable for all those WalMart shoppers...
The great thing about having more time from work is that I will have more time to read as I have some great books and can't wait to get at them. I finished the 2 books by Jeff Lindsay who writes the Dexter books that the SHO Time series is from. Dearly Devoted Dexter and Darkly Dreaming Dexter...Oh man, were they good..He is so sick and twisted and I fucking love him, which makes me wonder, what does that say about me?...
There is a lot more news, but can't remember any of it right now..so this will be all for now folks..enjoy your holiday and say a toast to our soldiers, the ones that have gone ahead and the ones that are still here.

Friday, May 23, 2008

5TH BLOG I AM RECOMMENDING

http://nitwitsnetwit.blogspot.com/

ok...you have to fucking trust me on this...everyone..and I do mean everyone must go to nitwit's blog and watch the video...I laughed so hard I not only peed on myself, I spit stuff out of my nose on the screen...I'm still howling....
While you are at it...you must check his posts out..Nitwit and Billy Pilgrim are my two very very favorites...http://ghostofruby.blogspot.com/
but right now.?...check out the video...damn...I wish I had thought of it..
I'm sure doing a lot of posts lately...have a great Memorial Day Weekend..

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

STATE MOTTOS

State Mottos Alabama to Wyoming
Alabama: Yes, We Have Electricity

Alaska: 11,623 Eskimos Can't Be Wrong!
Alaska: Jeez, it's cold.
Arizona: But It's A Dry Heat
Arkansas: Literacy Ain't Everything
California: By 30, Our Women Have More Plastic Than Your Honda Colorado: If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother
Connecticut: Like Massachusetts, Only The Kennedys Don't Own It Yet Delaware: Everything is smaller here!
Delaware: We Really Do Like The Chemicals In Our Water
Florida: Ask Us About Our Grandkids
Florida: America's wang
Georgia: We Put The "Fun" In Fundamentalist Extremism
Hawaii: Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru (Death To Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)
Idaho: More Than Just Potatoes. Well Okay, Not Really, But The Potatoes Sure Are Real Good
Illinois: Please Don't Pronounce the "S"
Indiana: 2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free
Iowa: We Do Amazing Things With Corn
Kansas: First Of The Rectangle States
Kentucky: Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names
Louisiana: We're Not ALL Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign
Maine: We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster
Maryland: If You Can Dream It, We Can Tax It
Massachusetts: Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's (For Most Tax Brackets)
Michigan: First Line Of Defense From The Canadians
Minnesota: 10,000 Lakes And 10,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes Mississippi: Come And Feel Better About Your Own State
Missouri: Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars At Work
Montana: Land Of The Big Sky, The Unabomber, Right-Wing Crazies, And Very Little Else
Nebraska: Ask About Our State Motto Contest
Nebraska: Land of Two Seasons - Winter and Construction
Nevada: Whores and Poker!
New Hampshire: Go Away And Leave Us Alone
New Hampshire: Just like Old Hampshire, but newer
New Jersey: You Want A ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here!
New Mexico: Lizards Make Excellent Pets
New York: You Have The Right To Remain Silent, You Have The Right To An Attorney
North Carolina: Tobacco Is A Vegetable
North Dakota: We Really Are One Of The 50 States!
Ohio: At Least We're Not Michigan
Ohio: Where one of your dad's friends lives
Oklahoma: Like The Play, Only No Singing
Oregon: Spotted Owl - It's What's For Dinner
Pennsylvania: Cook With Coal
Rhode Island: We're Not REALLY An Island
South Carolina: Remember The Civil War? We Didn't Actually Surrender South Dakota: Closer Than North Dakota
Tennessee: The Educashun State
Texas: Si' Hablo Ing'les (Yes, I Speak English)
Utah: Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus
Vermont: Yep
Vermont: Gettin' busy with New Hampshire since 1791
Virginia: Who Says Government Stiffs And Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix? Washington: Help! We're Overrun By Nerds And Slackers!
Washington, D.C.: Wanna Be Mayor?
West Virginia: One Big Happy Family - Really!
Wisconsin: Come Cut The Cheese
Wisconsin: Come Smell our Dairy Air
Wyoming: Where Men Are Men (And The Sheep Are Scared)

Monday, May 19, 2008

I HAB A CODE..FUCT!

I was going to do a post..but I feel like ca ca doo doo..which was one of my favorite words when i was about 4 years old..I have the book cases up and all the books are semi separated and put up...I had Sunday off but had to work today from 10-3 and off tomorrow...one of my customers gave me a code..them lousy sonsabitch's..I will find out who they are and will kick some ass..until then...here's some stumble upons...













if hippies ruled.....