ASK THE GODDESS

Yes, I'm back. I've been busy cleaning up after your wars and trying to start romances around this weird little planet of yours. It seems it's much easier for the people of your planet to fight than it is to fuck. Which makes no sense to me. I realize my motto is 'if you can't lay 'em, slay 'em."...But really it's just a joke folks..I'm taking a little R&R at the Yellowdog's and will take in a few skunk eggs and some kolaches. I'll say one thing about this little hole in the wall town...they make some good grub. I know the Yellowdog is obsessed with Dublin Dr Pepper, but I much prefer Big Red. Tasty ..mighty tasty. I'll be here for a few days..so if you have any questions you'd like to ask..go right ahead..I'll have your answers this Saturday. Go in peace people of Earth..and remember..fuck..not fight.

ASK THE GODDESS

Blessings on you my children. Yellowdog told me you had been asking for me, so ask and you shall receive..(that Book stole all my great lines)..but I'm not going to tell you again no more questions about politics or sports...for the last time: the Goddess doesn't give a stuffed dwarf, about your sports or politics. Until the loser of the game or the election is used for a human sacrifice, keep me out of it. Don't make me come bip you. I'll give you till Friday for all your questions and then I'll have them for you this Sunday. I hope you come up with something worth my time, I am a busy Goddess and as love and war is my game...I always have my hands full. Hearts are broken and warriors lost. The beat goes on..damn that Sonny, he's been singing that song in the halls for 3 days, and I don't think I'll ever get it out of my head. Not near as much fun as when Frankie croons me..ooooh Frankie..he's still got it..

ASK THE GODDESS

Fairy and Princess supplies? Oh my!..Wendy has some 'burning questions' so I thought I might as well squeeze in a visit before football season starts because once the 'boys' suit up...the Yellowdog will be glued to that new 32' television of hers. If they win that's all she'll want to talk about. If they lose she won't want to speak to anyone. So little citizens of the planet earth...ask away. Remember no politics or sports..those are the Yellowdog's areas...the Goddess, could care less.

ASK THE GODDESS

blessings on you my children..

Now that Easter is over I thought I'd stop by and see what's going on in my favorite little city by the big I-35...I don't like Easter...at all..I figure if Christians would nail the son of God to a cross, can you imagine what they'd do to a pagan Deity? Besides, the last conversation I had with Jesus, he mentioned that he thinks it's a sad statement to him for every one to remember him by wearing him nailed to a cross around their neck. He thinks a little necklace of him rolling a stone from a cave would be more to his liking. Why make a necklace to celebrate the worse day of his life. You Christians...so silly...That would be like pagans wearing a necklace of St. Patrick burning druids at the stake.

I'm going to be around for a week or so...it's spring time in Texas and I had to come check out the blue bonnets, and since they don't deliver, to stock up on some Dublin Dr Pepper. You will have from today till next Wed. to ask your questions. I'll answer them on Thursday...Remember..no POLITICS..NO SPORTS.. The Goddess doesn't give a shit who's going to win the Super Bowl, or the Basketball playoffs..and since your life's a crap shoot ...politics aren't important.

ASK THE GODDESS

I'm bacccccck!...I had to make a short trip to pick up Eartha Mae, she's as much of a warrior as any Marine I know. Everyone was putting on their best duds to greet her, and George Carlin even put on clean underwear. I thought while I was here I'd stop by and see what the Yellow Dog got for the Christian Holiday, Christmas. She's doing a naked dance in the living room. She got 4 bottles of Tabu perfume and every time she farts there are little puffs of Tabu powder shooting across the room. Something about Tabuing her naked ass. I'm sure you all must know what she's talking about.

I'm here to answer all your questions...again, please no political questions or anything about sports. That's the Yellow Dogs speciality...I don't care about politics or sports. So remember that. I'll be back as soon as I carry Eartha Mae home. Be back Monday. My blessings on you..........

1,400TH POST(ASK THE GODDESS)

I stole the Yellow Dog's 1,400th post to let you ask more questions..She's passed out on the couch mumbling something about dancing meeces.... what ever...

I'm going to start making this a weekly visit for a while so if you didn't get to ask questions last time, nows your chance. I'm going to go make an old Viking potion to strengthen up the Yellow Dog's blood...she's a weak and puny human and needs a libation that will kick start her ass...Goddess bless you my children, and be on the look out for Loki, he's out and about with his little bag of tricks.

ASK THE GODDESS

Blessings on you my children...

I'm here for the Super Bowl, and I need some one to answer one question for me...If the Super Bowl is so super.. why do they have it again next year?....

The Yellow Dog says she doesn't care who wins as her beloved Cowboys aren't in it..I don't care either, I'm only here for the stuffed jalapenos with cheese..sooo..

You're all invited to ask the Goddess any question you'd like...what would you like to know...and don't ask me who'll win the game as I don't care enough to find out..But Loki is with me..so look for some touch down high jinx's..

.......ASK THE GODDESS.......

As my good friend Cadmus once said:"I shall tell you a great secret, my friend.Do not wait for the last judgement.It takes place every day."

And from the great woman troubadour Iselda:"Lady Carenza,I'd like to have a husband,

but making babies I think is a huge penitence:

your breasts hang way down

and it's too anguishing to be a wife."

Ahh, wisdom of the ages....

If you have any questions for the Goddess, you will have until Sunday night at midnight to ask me anything you would like..I will answer them and then go collect slain warriors and take them to Valhalla...Blessings on you my children...Peace..

.......ASK THE GODDESS.......

Blessings on you my children...Since the Yellow Dog is off doing early karma I thought I would drop by and bestow some Goddess wisdom on you..I know life has not been what some of you have wished for..but seriously humans...you all can't win the lottery..

.......SHE'S BACK!.......

Blessings on you my children..May your butt crack be free of twisted underwear..I have come back for a short visit to meet one of the Yellowdog's new readers...Sebastien has never met the Goddess before and wanted him to get a chance to ask his question ....You all are welcome to ask your questions also..Then I'm back to Valhalla...Friday night is karoke night and you haven't lived (or died as the case may be) until you hear all those soldiers singing "War, what is it good for...absolutely nothing."

Until Saturday...chin up..tits out...and don't let your meat loaf...

SHEEEEEEEEEEEE'S BACK!!!

Greetings and blessings on you my children..I hope you enjoyed your Christian Holiday...What a nice mixture you have for your Christian holidays...dead people on crosses, bunny rabbits, and hard boiled eggs..then for Christmas you have a birthday celebrated by a fat man in a red suit in a sleigh being dragged through the sky by some reindeer...You gave up worshiping me for that??????

You have 2 days to ask all the questions you desire...and I will have your answers on Saturday...I still don't understand why there isn't any mead swilled at these celebrations...