I'm a pagan...I'm a liberal..I live in West, Texas..

Monday, August 10, 2015

my debate party..

The Goddess is in West, for the debates..she said the clown show in Sessumnir has folded up and moved on to Hel, so she's in need of a few good laughs and Fox news tonight is the place to get them. She and I would play the drinking game, but she doesn't want to send me to rehab so we're just going to have popcorn and Diet Ginger Ale.
She, like me, agrees that it should be on Comedy Central.
The head clown for this circus is Donald Trump...his qualifications are his questionable abilities to build this mass fortune which to hear him say is billions and billions..The Goddess say's it's maybe 10 million at the max. He also hosted the Apprentice, where if he was a contestant, he wouldn't last the first show. The Goddess say's:"Donald Trump? You're fired." She also said that he has the smarts and temperament of a 9-year-old boy being told he can't stay up past bedtime to watch Nightmare on Elm Street. She expects him to get called on his bullshit tonight and thinks he'll have a full-blown hissy fit and maybe will hold his breath until he turns purple, pass out and be carried off the stage with wet pants.


The former Governor of Florida Jeb Bush is going to be fun to watch. She says he lets lose more bullshit than his brother ever did and she enjoys watching him covering his ass, but he needs to be covering his mouth instead.

Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker she said should just be institutionalised for the mentally stupid and criminal. Refuses to discuss him anymore.

Now former Governor Mike Huckabee, that's an entirely different story..she loooooves talking about Mike. She calls him Fuckabee, she's such a caution that Goddess. She said she's never seen someone kiss ass like he does. Now he's wooing the black churches. She said he's going to get a humpback from bending over kissing asses, and she looks forward to watching that.

Retired neurosurgeon Ben Carson just confuses her..She doesn't understand how a smart talented black man could demean himself by turning off his smarts and running with the dumb dogs.He just trying to make the history books? He won't make the history books...Texas writes the history books and they don't recognize black people..even if they're neurosurgeon's.

United States Senator Ted Cruz. The Goddess says:"Do you notice if you take out the u add and an A and a Y, you have crazy." Not much of a stretch.

Mario Rubio...such a waste...so pretty..The Goddess and I think after he fails as a politician he should get a job in the next Magic Mike movie and put his talents to use.

Paul Rand. The nut doesn't fall to far from the tree. Batshit runs strong in the Rand genes. The Goddess says she looked his family history up and she found that if you go far back enough searching his family tree you will find out that the only reason his family didn't die out with the neanderthals is the homo sapiens needed someone to mash the grapes for the wine.

Oh-oh-oh...New Jersey Governor Chris Christi...The New Jersey Devil. She said he's just a donut short of a  heart attack so not to even bother with him. After she saw him in the baseball uniform, she said that's not all he's short on.

When I asked her about Ohio Governor John Kasich, she said who?...

So, the Goddess and I will be watching the circus tonight and we were lamenting the fact there were no elephants, but then we remembered Chris Christi..we had a good laugh over that one..I think everyone should start giving him a peanut every time they see him, maybe call him Dumbo.
drop by after the debate and tell me what you think..

4 comments:

Intense Guy said...

All I can say is 300 MILLION Americans and this is the best we can do for candidates??????

Auld Hat said...

Texas writes the history books, lol. Oh JS you nailed it with this one. So glad the Goddess speaks so candidly with you. She whispers poetry in my ear and confuses me. Granted, I've assumed things about her that may or may not be true so, what the fuck do I know. Love you

Ol'Buzzard said...

That was a great rundown. Obviously the Goddess has divine insight.

You notice when Trump is asked to explain his positions it goes like this:
I will be a great President
I will produce great jobs
I will take care of women
I will be a great military leader
I will defeat Isis
I will make Mexico pay for the wall
And I am very good looking - and rich

A lot of substance there.
the Ol'Buzzard

billy pilgrim, knight of the woeful countenance. said...

the question i always ask myself is:

do the loony politicians reflect the people that vote for them or do the loony people reflect the politicians who tell them what to think?

what came first, the chicken or the egg?