I'm a pagan...I'm a liberal..I live in West, Texas..

Thursday, July 31, 2008

WASTE OF THE GODDESS'S TIME



If I live forever(which I will) I will never understand how you can have a chance to ask a Deity questions and not come up with anything better than you have...Odin's teeth, surely next time you'll come up with a question that will make it worth hanging around this planet that is starting to resemble a trash heap. Don't you people know how to clean up after yourselves?

Robin, Robin, Robin..Here you have a chance to ask a Goddess a question and you can't come up with anything?....Thor's drawers girl.
Anne wants to know what pantheon she must join to spend eternity with George Carlin, and all I can say is... just follow the laughter...
The Michael wants to know if he can see the other tit. Men...if the Goddess could think of a way for you humans to reproduce, I'd do away with most men...If I showed you both tits Michael you'd go blind. A little Goddess goes along way.
Rox wants to know who will win big brother 10. Who cares. The Goddess doesn't watch TV, except for Dexter.
Travis wants to know why the Gods allow Jerry Jones to live. Why don't you ask the Gods Travis, the Goddess doesn't do sports.
Rebecca wants to know how to stop the kids from calling early in the morning and wanting her kids to come out and play. The Goddess doesn't do finesse...Pick up the telephone and scream into it, you better not call again before 11am or you'll rip out their tiny beating hearts and feed them to the dogs.
Billy Pilgrim wants to know if the nasty Tibetans will disturb the peaceful Chinese Olympics. The Goddess some times gets very angry at the people on this planet, but wiping out a tribe of people for no good reason, only gets the Goddess into destroy mode herself. It's not nice to mess with the Goddess.
Rainwolf wants to know who will play Dorothy in the remake of The Wizard Of Oz. The Goddess doesn't care. Movies schmovies.
Old Enough To Moan:not soon enough. War and Love is the Goddess's realm...but she wishes you peace from pain.
Joy wants to know if there is any hope for the human race or if they will just disappear from the face of the earth. Personally the Goddess is much surprised that you people on this planet haven't already disappeared. I'm not sure there is any hope for you. Greed, avarice, hunger for power...not the best of traits to have for survival. Soon only the mighty few will be in control of the weak..and there will be many of the weak. You treat your planet like a garbage heap, you kill, main, rape, destroy what you can't have and get fat off of the profits of others..Some times I wonder why the Gods and Goddess's just don't erase you and start from scratch. Maybe because they know you will do it to yourself.
Sage.............yes.
Tex has a political question, and the Goddess doesn't do politics. She doesn't care. You people are fucked no mater what you do...It's to late to take back the reins from the power hunger people in charge.
Nitwit needs to know what vice he can adopt to find a new zest for life. Giving is a good vice..
Sling, the Yellow Dog says no pony...but I've seen the surprise and it's a good one.
TSDuff has a question from Garden Jack, and tell Garden Jack that he will have to grow a dick before he can find Garden love.
Unokhan:Frank Zappa.
Lily wants to cuss out people about the gas prices. Yeah, that'll help..Get a bike, walk to the store. Car Pool...Take fewer trips.
Just tell the people to quit poking holes in the planet and to use more of their own energy in place of trying to produce more. The Goddess doesn't understand you people...all of you people..your ancestors walked this world for thousands of years and it worked for them. Get up off your over fed asses and use your feet and legs to get to one place or another, before your planet is all used up.
Angel has a sex question. Finally something I'm good at. Why do you feel the need to 'ask for sex'...The Goddess made woman to take sex..not ask for it...All men want sex, you give it to him, he'll be happy ...There is nothing wrong with lots of good healthy sex..just don't have any babies..this world has enough people..
Jan, you have too much time on your hands..No one cares how long a man's hair will be if he doesn't shave, or how long a woman's hair under her arm would be if she didn't shave. One man could live to be 80 and it's going to be longer than a man who only lives to be 40...sigh*..another wasted question.
Scottish Toodler wants to know if she should use her power for good or evil. This world has enough people using power for evil with out more. Do the right thing.(the Goddess likes Spike Lee's ideas)
Mrsb wants to know if it would be wrong to curse the woman who talked during Hell Boy 2...Hell Boy 2..???? Is Loki back?..
The Goddess recommends bipping not cursing..or bipping with cursing.
On the recommendation of another Goddess I'm going to Reading Terminal Market to get some Philly Cheese Steaks for the Vikings. I hope the next time I take your questions you will have something better to ask, or I'll sic Loki on your asses..
Blessings on you my children.

14 comments:

Scottish Toodler said...

Goddess you must be obeyed, so I will use my powers for good... except when I can semi-blind men by showing them both of my breasts... I am not a Goddess so I suppose I will only semi-blind...Or perhaps semi-blinding men IS using my powers for good???? Thank you Goddess, and Thank you Jackiesue!!!

Nit Wit said...

Giving is great but sometimes it's better to receive. I always did do things ass backwards

Robin said...

Damn. I try to so hard to be clever and ambiguous and I get smacked! Ouch! Deserved that one didn't I?!?!?

The next time the Goddess takes questions I will be prepared.

This is too much fun!

billy pilgrim said...

you ain't the only feckin deity in town.

fuck, you don't even give out 2 for 1 whopper coupons.

tsduff said...

Garden Jack sends his thanks to the Goddess, and will commence trying to grow a dick. It is kind of hard to do when your pants are painted on.

unokhan said...

nit, if u get a new zest also ask 4 a fresh something to do with it-- ya don't want to discover you're all dressed up with no place to go, nah meen?

catscratch said...

The Godess is awesome. Very snippy answers. We like snippy.

sageweb said...

Yippee!

yellowdog granny said...

scottish toodler:good over evil always is better..except when needed..
nitwit:i think you'll find with the grandkids, giving will be an easy thing to do...
robin:i think the goddess was hung over and wasn't showing alot of patience..ha
billypilgrim:no but she gives 2 bips for the price of one...
tsduff:i'll have to find a female gnome to send to garden jack..ha
unokhan:frank zappa
catscratch:i think she had been doing too much partying and her sense of humor when by the way side..ha
sage:I hope...cross our fingers..

Nan said...

Isn't the whole thing kind of a contradictory exercise? If a person can think of a question sufficiently profound to make it worth the Goddess' time to answer, than that person should also be self-aware enough to not have to ask the question to begin with. Kind of like a Zen koan where it turns out the answer is there is no answer.

Lily Strange said...

Sorry, my imagination is shot.
I would be gleeful to use one of those new air powered cars if they ever come on the market. And I'd be gleeful to take public transit if it didn't suck. They don't even go from the town I live in to the place I work on weekends--oh yeah, and I work weekends. If I ride a bike around here with these yahoos my fat ass will end up a corpse on the side of the road. And you really don't want me around, ever, so you have to let me live.

texlahoma said...

What Billy said!

yellowdog granny said...

apologies to all...goddess had a hair up her ass...

angel said...

lol... so funny you should say that- a tarot reading i just had says motherhood is in the offing!