I'm a pagan...I'm a liberal..I live in West, Texas..

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

I HAVEN'T COME ALONG WAY....AND I'M NOT YOUR FUCKING BABY



















You know you have way to much time on your hands if when you are eating a bowl of alphabet soup, you search around looking for letters so you can spell out 'fuck you'...I swear to the Goddess, I did this today at lunch..I even took a picture of it and when I get the 2-3 rolls of film developled I will put them on the blog so you can see and say.."Yes, she has waaaaaay to much time on her hands."
Today's post boys and girls is going to be weird..not so much what I am posting about, but my take on it...lets see...where shall I start..oh I know...Willie has a new album out and it looks like it could be a fucking classic, if you are a old country and western fan..It's called 'Last of the Breed.'...with Merle Haggard and Ray Price..just how cool is that..? "Heartaches by the Number,""Pick Me Up on Your Way Down,", "Why Me,"(one of my favorites),and "I love You a Thousand Ways.".....sigh..I want this one...Which reminds me..I have to rewire the speakers on my $99 special(20 years old) record player...I have been hankering to listen to some of my old records..
Ok, this is one of the articles that made my mind sort of go off in different directions ...
Chiquita admits paying terrorists...Banana company Chiquita Brands International Inc. admitted in federal court Monday that it paid Columbian terrorists for years to protect its most profitable banana-growning operation..
The company pleaded guilt to one count of doing business with a terorist organization. The plea is part of a deal with prosecutors that calls for a $25 million fine and does not identify the several senior executives who approved the illegal protection payments. Prosecutors say the Cincinnaati based company agreed to pay about $1.7 million between 1997 and 2004 to the United Self-defense Forces of Columbia.
The group has been responsible for some of the worse massacres in Columbia's civil conflict and for a sizable percentage of the country's cocaine exports. Chiquita has said it was forced to make the payments and was acting only to ensure the safety of its workers.
So here's my take on it..This is an American company that is working in a country that exports cocaine, a country that is out of control because of the drug cartels and our country can't pump enough money in there fast enough to 'help' this country...and to ensure that their company employees aren't kidnapped and or killed, Chiquita pays $1.7 million dollars over a 7 year period..and to punish them...they fine them $25million...! Fuck the only difference between the drug cartel and the government is we didn't use the threat of kidnapping and murder to get the money...and we got more money than the bad guys did..So what happens to the $25 mil?...What will happen to the employees of Chiquita now that there is no payoff? What happens to the $25 mil?...Why don't they take the $25mil and use it to help get security for the workers of Chiquita Banana?...Am I nuts?...well, that's besides the point..Does this smack of Bush Administration logic...one of our countries is being blackmailed for security reasons in another country..so lets fine them 25 times the amount they were paying and cut them loose...It made better sense when I was picking through carrots and peas looking for a u for 'fuck you.'...sigh*
Now..this is the good one...you all know I love my stupid state even if it is full of stupid red necks toting Bibles in one hand and a 38 special in the other...right?
Well...here is the latest in my series of "only in fucking Texas'...
A self-defense bill opposed by prosecutors across the state breezed through the House on Monday and is expected to be on the governor's desk by the end of the week..(we all know Good Hair Perry will sign that sucker into a bill in a New York City second.)
The legislation, pushed by gun-rights advocates in several states, will allow ANY...I REPEAT..ANY law-abiding(yeah right) citizen who feels threatened by someone to kill that person without first trying to get away, prosecutors say....Just in case you didn't grasp this...anyone any time anyfuckingwhere can shoot to kill, anyone if they feel like they are being threatened...The bill is an extension of the current "castle doctrine" in Texas, under which a homeowner has the right to shoot an intruder to protect himself. The new legislation extends taht to :anywhere a person "has a right to be," according to the bill.
Prosecutors say tht means cars, jobs, parks, malls, street corners or anywhere else a person might feel threatened. Lawmakers say that interpertation is too broad. ya think? The bill makes three major changes to current law. First, it extends the "castle doctrine" beyond the home. Second, it protects a person from being sued by his attacker-or the attacker's family-for injuries if the shooter was found to have been acting in self-defense.And it creates a "presumption of self-defense" much like the presumption of innocence, but applied in deadly-force cases.
It's the third part of the bill that supporters say is most important to protect law-abiding gun owers(oxymoron) who aren't afraid to use deadly force. That's also the part that worries prosecutors and gun-control advocates.
The bill would require a jury to presume that a defendant who has hurt or killed someone was acting in self-defense as long as the defendant wasn't breaking the law at the time, didn't provoke the attack and had reason to believe tht the other person wanted to rape, kidnap, kill or rob him.
Sponsors say the bill is intended only for people who are in their homes, cars or businesses-or their loved ones are-and who use deadly force to protect against someone who is "unlawfully" and "forcibly" trying to enter the car or business to hurt them.
But prosecutors point to this section of the bill as having the potential for uninteded consequences, such as gang-style murders tht leave no witnesses and trigger-happy peole who kill a panhandler for approaching them on the street with his hand in his pocket.
They say that prosecutors rarely file charges on someone with a clear case of self-defense but that the new bill will make it easy to beat a murder rap and, in some cases, impossible to convict.The law is restoring a right Texans had 40 years ago, said Rep. Joe Driver, R-Garland(gee, a republican...what a surprise...wonder how much the NRA is puttin in his pocket?)and it doesn't stop police and DA's from investigating and building cases against murderers, carjackers, and even trigger-happy motorists with road rage.
"What the prosecutors are saying, they're just whining," Mr. Driver said. "They're not reading this bill. They're reading comic books or something....If you're driving down the road adn your're afraid someone's going to shoot you, and you shoot them, they know they can prosecute."
(wow, that was clear and concise, huh?)
Well, I don't know whether to shit or go shoot someone..
"But your honor, she was yelling and screaming and calling me a fucking republican, I had to shoot her...I knew she was one of them left wing tree hugging pagan Democrats, and was a threat to my way of life."

fuckme till my powder's dry.

14 comments:

buddha_girl said...

Oh my God.

*drying my eyes*

Fuck You alphabet soup. I can't wait until Buddha gets to reading!!! This should be great fun!

I think if the poor banana people have to pay $25 million, shit-heads in Washington should have to pay an exponential amount of that. Sound fair?

Fuck it. Just shoot me. G'head. Gt it over with.

yellowdog granny said...

Buddhagirl:I have the fuck you on a small plate sitting in the refrigerator...every time I open the door I giggle..I'm pissed at Thom so I am thinking of driving to his house and leaving the plate on his door step with a note saying..'from mom...'but with the new gun law he might think I am a threat and shoot me...

Cheesemeister said...

I love that you found the letters to spell Fuck You in the alphabet soup! That's hilarious!
I still get a kick out of looking up dirty words in the dictionary. See how long of a way I haven't come?

Tabor said...

I once lived in Texas...I can see it has changed. I am glad I don't live there anymore as I tend to be a little too outspoken and I don't carry a gun.

BBC said...

Ha, ha, ha.

You sound a lot like me, and ramble on muttering a lot like I do.

You just might be Goddess, I've always pictured her that way.

I know that she cusses and says fuck a lot.

As for Nascar and guns, I don't much like guns, I think hugs are better.

Enjoy your blog, but don't let it drive you too nuts.

High-Maintenance & Hostile Heidi said...

That gun law is f*cking scary! Yikes.

Wow, some people feel "threatened" if someone just looks at them. I'm afraid this law, if passed, will create more racial tension because I can just see the scenario when some Republican gun-toting blond housewife feels "threatened" when a black man standing behind in the grocery line reaches into his pocket and opens fire. Gee, turns out he was reaching for his WALLET.

Good thing I never have to go to Texas, or I'd probably wind up dead because of my straight-forward, tell-it-like-it-is demeanor.

When is the Apocolypse going to get here? I can't take much more of this. I think I should just go hide in a cave or not read the newspaper or Granny's blog because she sure keeps me up-to-date on current events! Scary current events! :)

texlahoma said...

Oklahoma already has that law, it's the "Stand your ground law". So far it hasn't lead to mass killings, people don't seem to be offing each other left and right. Maybe they're just waiting until the time is right, then BAM! "Tousands of Oklahomans killed do to the stand your ground law."
"Hey look! It's a pile of dead panhandlers!"
Sounds like Chiquita did the smart thing. Better to have to pay out 26.7 million to various armed groups of thugs (official or not), than to loose your entire operation.

yellowdog granny said...

cheesemeister: i think it is a sign of the steady decaying of my brain cells..which ain't a bad thing..
tabor: i will probably be one of the first victims of the law...loudmouth redneck gets shot ..one fuck you too many said shooter...
bbc:ah, Im to crazy to be driven nuts...hugs are on...but guns and nascar ...it just crys out to be done..
hmh: I don't see this world making it to the end of 2020....poof, we're all history and the world will go on and start all over again...
tex;i didn't know oklahoma had that law..is it like ours where you can shoot anyone anywhere anytime if you feel threatened?,,dang..us okies and texans are bad ass..
i think it was the freto bandito that robbed chiquita banana..i read today the us is trying to bring the 8 people that are responisible along with a case of guns to the us for trial..of course there are no executives getting charged..fuckers..

yellowdog granny said...

by the way..the cartoon of the woman is done by my nephew the artist/cartoonist..

Allan said...

Oh my, started laughing at the soup, then you mentioned Willie- I have to go home and get bonged-up and re-read this! The guns and bananas scare me- was Carmen Miranda a terrorist?

Wicked Storm said...

I talked to one of my sisters today and she carries a nice little hand gun in a granny pack, sortta like a fanny pack...in Minnesota you can carry a concealed weapon. Anyway she's 73 years old. She said her and my other sister stopped some where at 2:00 am and she said to the other sister "don't worry I got your back Lee" This visual put me into hysterics. Sorry I got off there...ya I like bananas.

Josh said...

Gun law + hate crimes = bad, bad juju. Especially since the "gay panic" defense has been used, with varying degrees of success, in recent memory.

"I had to attack him; I thought he was coming on to me!"

I wonder if the neo-cons will boycott bananas now, along with France.

Lavender said...

"and was a threat to my way of life"

you said it all right there.

there is this guy who builds these expensive stone mailboxes for people. I want mine to have a giant pentacle in the middle of it. No prob- its called the Texas star, lol!!! I wanna stir up trouble and have a pagan garden, lol!

zero said...

thats it- i am moving to texas.