I'm a liberal pagan living in West, Texas. Yes. That West, Texas.

Sunday, July 27, 2008

ASK THE GODDESS


Blessings on you my children..I'm back on your puny little planet after a drunken orgy in Valhalla, and have a ferocious hangover, so speak softly...The place hasn't been the same since George Carlin arrived..he and Hunter S. Thompson got into a pissing contest and I mean a real pissing contest..It's knee deep in urine in the great hall. George, Richard Pryor, and Lenny Bruce are teaching the old Vikings every dirty word they know..One of the old Vikings kept using Thor's name as a cuss word...George said:"Thor.....?....Thor?...I'm so thor I can't even piss."....He's a funny guy that George..

So...ask your questions..I'll be here till Wed. and then Thursday the Yellowdog will post my answers....Oh, my stars, isn't there any place a Goddess can get her hands on some Mead?

21 comments:

Robin said...

OMG...I'm laughing so hard right now...the mental image, the theological implications alone are completely staggering! I am scots/irish (a product of rape and pillage if there ever was one!) and wiccan in nature (pun intended!) so I LOVE this! George, Lenny...and Hunter?! Methinks the Great White Shark might have to crack a smile!

Here's my question oh wise one. What should my question be?

Anne Johnson said...

What pantheon do I have to register with in order to spend eternity with George Carlin?

Alex Pendragon said...

Can't we see the left tit too?

Rox said...

Here's a question for the goddess...who will win Big Brother 10?!

Travis Erwin said...

Why do the gods allow Jerry Jones to continue to breath?

Anonymous said...

Goddess, how do I get the annoying neighbor kid to quit calling our house at the asscrack of dawn to get my kids to come out and play?

billy pilgrim said...

will those nasty tibetans disrupt the peaceful chinese olympics?

Rainwolf said...

Who will play Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz remake, because you know they'll do it eventually.

old enough to moan said...

When will the pain stop?

joy said...

Is there any hope for the human race or will we eventually just disappear from the universe?

sageweb said...

I love this post...made me spew coffee.
For the goddess..Will the cheerful retard ever entertain us again?

texlahoma said...

Why doesn't Obama tell Mccain that a surge would never have been necessary if they hadn't started the war to find nonexistent WMDs in the first place?

Nit Wit said...

I figured out a question finally.

What new vice can I adopt to give me a new zest for life?
And bare in mind that I don't like reruns.

Sling said...

I love ponies.
I'm hoping my dear friend Jac will send me a pony.
Do you know any good recipes for pony?

tsduff said...

Criminey, I'm laughing so hard I have to stop coughing before I get to the subject at hand.

Garden Jack sends his love to the Goddess. And to Jackie Sue from whence his life began. When will I (Garden Jack) find my true love?

unokhan said...

"The illusion of freedom will continue as long as it's profitable to continue the illusion. At the point where the illusion becomes too expensive to maintain, they will just take down the scenery, they will pull back the curtains, they will move the tables and chairs out of the way and you will see the brick wall at the back of the theater"

who said that

Unknown said...

I just want to curse about gas prices.
Damn, damn, damn.

AngelConradie said...

i love this.
oh goddess, should i hold back on "asking" for sex even if i want it every night... so as not to make my sweetheart think i am strange because i want it so much?

Jan said...

this is a question that everyone wonders about: if a man never shaved, how long would his beard get by the time he died? And if a woman never shaved her underarms, how long would the hair get?

Scottish Toodler said...

Goddess, should I take it as a sign from this picture of you to only show one breast at a time? Also, should I use my power for good or evil? I always thought good, but evil just seems so much more tempting the older I get. In response to your question, alot of honey bee farms make mead. Try farmer's markets during the summer. If you send the Valkeries to the Hollywood Farmer's Market on the weekends you can usually find some mead.

KrisMrsBBradley said...

Would it be wrong of me to curse the rude bitch who talked through Hell Boy 2? This was the first movie in years my 16 year old and I both wanted to see, and he actually went and sat with me!