So...I know I mentioned this on facebook, but can't remember if I told it here..if I have stop me.hahah..ok..so I'm sitting in my recliner and can see right out the window into parking lot etc. I look up and the mail truck is busting ass into the parking lot, squeels into a u-turn and runs up and over the curb and slams into a stop by the office..directly across from my apt. I calmly get up get the keys to my box and walk across to his truck, knock on the window with my keys and said 'your driving to f fast in the parking lot, there are little ole ladies here that are in walkers, use cans and have enough trouble getting around with out having to dodge you and the mail truck..'yes, mam'm.' every one that lives here are really nice little ole lady's except me, and I'm a bitch on wheels, so if I catch you doing this again, I'm jerking you out of the truck and kicking your ass.'
Then I called the post office and talked to G. and told him what had happened..(it's against the law to threaten a gov. employee) and that I had threatened to kick his ass and why. He was so sweet(me..the bringing of cooked goods, must be appeased..ha)said he was sorry and said it was ok, but thought he should know what had happened. So I'm pretty sure, the mail truck will be coasting into the parking lot from here on out.
Sunday when I told my granddaughter I was going to kick her xboyfriend's ass she said but you'll go to jail...I laughed and said..I think I have one more assault and battery charge left in me.
But that's a fucking joke..I spent all day Saturday(6 hours) cleaning apt. and now I can't walk..every inch of me is 68 years old ..fuckme till haying time, I'll never clean this place like that again. Hope every one had a terrific Thanksgiving..I sure did..Goddess bless all y'all.
15 comments:
A whole bunch of good ones and I get to be first again!
"My Official Monday Face" -- phew, that is one mean looking cat! You keep on kickin' ass, YDG! I hope you have a quiet and peaceful week, though, to recover from all that *ick* housework!
A lot of good ones!!
Johnny Depp has a good point...
Putin is right. :-)
Good for you for berating Speedy the Mailman.
I loved the Glenn Close one, silly humour is great!
I hear ya !
Night time finds me walking at a 45 degree angle holding my back like that character with a cane in the cartoons. :0)
nice
I thought it said Money makes the week go round.
yeah, but Monday started it..
It would be worth it sometimes to take the assault charge on some people eh? LOL! I stole the Grandma is Hardcore one. I'm going to send it to my kid. It ought to give her a laugh!
Loved the Bush one. Treated the US the same as he treated Texas1
I swear that cat with the Monday face is the double of my friend Mary. That final one reminded me of my kid sister (10yrs younger than me) when I collected her from her first day at school. She was also in tears, feeling so sorry for her new friends who only had really, really old, old mummies!
(Um, should explain, big sis' and I raised her.)
I've always loved her "glass half full" take on life.
Gahhhh, I forgot to say good on you and job well done on sorting out that Speedy Gonzales in the parking lot.
Happiness IS a warm butt! I enjoyed reading all of these... so nice to get a laugh this morning... thanks JS!
I dont know how you do it Yellowdog, but keep it up! I will post some more of these soon on my blog, giving you full credit of course.
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