shady lane sent these to me..made my fucking day!
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Monday, April 14, 2008
THREE YEARS.1 MONTH 2 DAYS
Happy Anniversary to me...happy anniversary to me...
I started this blog(over on the other place) on March 12th, 2005...In some ways it seems like it's just been a short time and other ways it seems like I've know you all for fucking ever...I know your husbands, I know your wife's, I know your kids...dogs and if you like your in-laws or not..I've lit candles and prayed for some of you at least once and most of you on a weekly basis..
I've talked to some of you on the phone, sent and received cards and gifts. Sooner came to visit, and Babs moved in the apartment complex where I live. This Labor Day Weekend I hope to have at least 6-8 people down to see me, the fest and my fair city of West, by Goddess, Texas. Some of you are my neighbors here in West, some of you are kinfolk, and one of you has been my friend since we worked together in the early 90's. But in many many ways..you're all my family...as I have taken you to my heart and love you like you're my mine..
So...thank you very much for dropping by my little home sweet home away from home these past 3 years...You've made it a wonderful time for me and I Thank you for being my friend....
AND THE GOOD NEWS IS:
Former attorney general Al Gonzales, who 
was forced to resign last years, can't find a job....He's put out inquiries but hasn't found any takers..He left office in August with his hat in hand and ass in a sling. He was up to his ass in alligators after being involved in the dismissal of several federal prosecutors and the truthfulness of his testimony about a secret eavesdropping program.
He hasn't had a full time job since he was booted out of office..His only income has been from giving a few talks at colleges and before private business groups.. He's still being investigated by the the Office of the Inspector Genera
l of the Justice Department.
well.....boo fucking hoo....what goes around ....comes around...see what happens when you let ass kissing become your primary focus...not to mention being a fucking liar..ahh, life is good..
was forced to resign last years, can't find a job....He's put out inquiries but hasn't found any takers..He left office in August with his hat in hand and ass in a sling. He was up to his ass in alligators after being involved in the dismissal of several federal prosecutors and the truthfulness of his testimony about a secret eavesdropping program. He hasn't had a full time job since he was booted out of office..His only income has been from giving a few talks at colleges and before private business groups.. He's still being investigated by the the Office of the Inspector Genera
l of the Justice Department. well.....boo fucking hoo....what goes around ....comes around...see what happens when you let ass kissing become your primary focus...not to mention being a fucking liar..ahh, life is good..
Sunday, April 13, 2008
BLOG #3 YOU HAVE TO CHECK OUT
http://bluebeerriver.blogspot.com/
This is my ole buddy Tex...from Oklahoma..it's a long story ....He and Sooner and Babs and the rest of us are all rejects from the old blog place, who's name I won't mention..don't want to give them any advertising..them bastids...Tex started out as Texlahoma and then discovered Blue Beer...I guess, never have been sure why he switched...but I would like him no matter what he called himself...He's funny, redneck, smart, and has a great pit bull dog named Bob...I'm crazy about Bob..Bob and Ruby are my 2 favorite dogs on line..Tex does a lot of political stuff, and some silly stuff, and blasts from the past...and he's for changing the laws on marijuana, so that makes him very smart in my book...He has another blog that is about conspiracies. They make me think..they make me wonder they make me think there is more to it than just a conspiracy...mabye like they could be true?....Scary stuff..makes me want to go kick someone's ass..but never Tex's...he's my buddy...I'm hoping that when Sooner comes down for Westfest that Tex and his wife will be able to come down with him..that would be soo cool..so...go check out my buddy..try him..you'll like it...
This is my ole buddy Tex...from Oklahoma..it's a long story ....He and Sooner and Babs and the rest of us are all rejects from the old blog place, who's name I won't mention..don't want to give them any advertising..them bastids...Tex started out as Texlahoma and then discovered Blue Beer...I guess, never have been sure why he switched...but I would like him no matter what he called himself...He's funny, redneck, smart, and has a great pit bull dog named Bob...I'm crazy about Bob..Bob and Ruby are my 2 favorite dogs on line..Tex does a lot of political stuff, and some silly stuff, and blasts from the past...and he's for changing the laws on marijuana, so that makes him very smart in my book...He has another blog that is about conspiracies. They make me think..they make me wonder they make me think there is more to it than just a conspiracy...mabye like they could be true?....Scary stuff..makes me want to go kick someone's ass..but never Tex's...he's my buddy...I'm hoping that when Sooner comes down for Westfest that Tex and his wife will be able to come down with him..that would be soo cool..so...go check out my buddy..try him..you'll like it...
Saturday, April 12, 2008
DIED AND GONE TO HEAVEN
West Public Library is having their annual book sale and Nancy who believes in the adage of $1 in the hand is worth more than $100 on the shelf, broke down and is selling all of the books Miss Henrietta has been stock piling for 25 years...holy shit..I spent $31.50 plus the $5 to be a friend of the Library...wait till you see what I got..
1.Down to Earth at Walden written and Illustrated by Marilynne K. Roach..worth aprx.$25.
2.The Gangs of New York an informal History of The Underworld by Herbert Asbury...worth..not sure..
3.A Short History of Rome and Italy by Mary Platt Parmele worth $15-$20
4. The Russian Alphabet Book by Fan Parker..aprx.$5
Around the World With a Camera. Leslie's Photographic Review of the Great War...worth from $100-$200
5.Martin Guitars a history by Mike Longworth(autographed in 1975 by the author...don't know worth yet..will google.
6.James Thurber 92 Stories..worth $25
7.The Crisis by Winston Churchill
8. Little Pictorial Lives of the Saints with a foreword by L.El Hostlot,Rector saying the Pope loved it..Pope Leo XIII that is.
9.Soldiers Three. The Story of the Gadsbys in Black and White by Rudyard Kipling.
10. Washington's Farewell Address and Webster's First Bunker Hill Oration..worth about $15
11.The Natural History of The Southwest edited by William A. Burns worth about $10
12. New Worlds. In Search of the Planets (including the Latest Uranus Discoveries).Heather Couper with Nigel Henbest worth about $10-$15
13.paper back copy of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang by Ian Fleming.
14.Sybil, or the Two Nations by Benjamin Disraeli.
15. Don Quixote for Young People..written anew for young people by James Baldwin.
16. The Old Oaken Bucket by Bellamy Partridge
17. The Best of Clarence Day including God and My Father, Life with Father, Life with Mother, This Simian World and selections from Thoughts Without Words.
18. Comes the Comrade! by Alexandra Orme.
19. Shared Dreams Martin Luther King, Jr. and The Jewish Community.
20. The Real Jewish Worth by Stuart E. Rosenberg
21.Clues to Americans Past by the National Geographic Society.
22. The Innocents Abroad by Mark Twain
23. The Red Balloon by Albert lamorisse.
24. Vanishing Species by Time Life Books
25. All Out For the Sack Race! an album of cartoons by Robt Day
26. The Greatest Thing in the World by Henry Drummond
27. copy of the above ..different printing.etc.
28. As a Man Thinketh by James Allen
29.. A Loser is..... by Charlie Manna and Bill Majeski (I collect books on humor and by humorists/comedians, etc.)
30. The Roof Of Africa by David Coulson.
31. The World's Vanishing Birds by Cyril Littlewood
32. A Journey to the Center of the Earth by Jules Verne.
I'm so excited I don't know if I should shit or go blind.
I love books...and some of these books I have been wanting to get my hands on for years...When I walked out of the library with the 2 boxes of books..I could hear Miss Henrietta spinning in her grave..
I have Sunday off, and it's not supposed to rain..don't get a day off till Wed. but that's ok with me.. I like having Sunday off..Sunday and Monday's were always my days off, that way I could watch the Cowboys if they played on Sunday and if they had a Monday night game...
I told Thom I wanted to ask now before everyone else got their request in for Labor Day Weekend off as I am having guests coming down for Westfest..He laughed and said you will have probably quit by then or killed James and be on trial for his murder...I have made a habit of zinging James at every chance I get..and he just laughs...He said he wouldn't get a raise again for about 2 years. I said and the rate he was going...it'd be 3 years..
Then yesterday he was giving us a litany of video games he likes to play...I said well, now it's official, your a geek.
He just laughs and laughs...Thom and Inky are just shaking their heads...Thom has actually gone out of his way to schedule us on different shifts as he's afraid I'm going to snap and bip him into a coma. But not to play favorites I had to zap Inky too. He was drinking this God-awful jolly rancher drink and I looked at it and told him it looked like cinnamon douche..
The machine that you use your credit card on takes for fucking ever to work...After waiting and waiting and waiting, it finally popped up..I read it and said to the lady .."Well, your credit is good, but you have an over due library book, and it's time to take your dog in for his shots."...I like amusing my customers...Some one will come in and ask where something is...like the round cake pans..and I will tell them it's in the round cake pan department..
Did I mention I get tomorrow off?...sigh*
Maryjo has called twice in two days to inform me that it's 87 degrees and she's sweating..People in San Francisco are freaking out over their 'heat wave.'...It's been in the 80's here too...and thank the well endowed Goddess, no rain is forecast...
My ass is dragging....bu'bye
oh ...almost forgot ..the Lady Trojans are in the playoffs, and areunbeaten in district..and the boys are in 3rd place so far...we're bad...yes, we're bad..We also had our annual Bluebonnet Run last Saturday which is when all the owners of Cushman's race around town...
We also had a Main Street cleanup for down town..Every one came and cleaned up 4 blocks o
f Main Street. Picking up trash, weeding, planting flowers, etc. Eventually they will do the entire down town area...I was going to help but that is the day I worked at the library...
f Main Street. Picking up trash, weeding, planting flowers, etc. Eventually they will do the entire down town area...I was going to help but that is the day I worked at the library...Plus April 15th at the West Community Center the West area democrats are having a grass roots meeting..I keep meaning to go and never do and have to work till 8 that night so don't know if I'll be able to make it..so many things to do....so little time...
Friday, April 11, 2008
TV GUIDE COVER
I got one of those put yourself on the cover of TV Guide's sexy's cover and thought oh, what the hell...I don't look like this any more anyhow..Add a lot more weight, change the hair to blonde, a bunch of wrinkles and tada..it's moi...well, the smile is the same..Wish I still looked like that...skinny ass and all..
Thursday, April 10, 2008
JOHN MCCAIN
John McCain's temper is well documented. He's called opponents and colleagues "shitheads," "assholes" and in at least one case "a fucking jerk."...
Three reporters from Arizona, on the condition of anonymity, also let me in on another incident involving McCain's intemperateness. In his 1992 Senate bid, McCain was joined on the campaign trail by his wife, Cindy, as well as campaign aide Doug Cole and consultant Wes Gullett. At one point, Cindy playfully twirled McCain's hair and said, "You're getting a little thin up there." McCain's face reddened, and he responded, "At least I don't plaster on the makeup like a trollop, you cunt." McCain's excuse was that it had been a long day. If elected president of the United States, McCain would have many long days.
Three reporters from Arizona, on the condition of anonymity, also let me in on another incident involving McCain's intemperateness. In his 1992 Senate bid, McCain was joined on the campaign trail by his wife, Cindy, as well as campaign aide Doug Cole and consultant Wes Gullett. At one point, Cindy playfully twirled McCain's hair and said, "You're getting a little thin up there." McCain's face reddened, and he responded, "At least I don't plaster on the makeup like a trollop, you cunt." McCain's excuse was that it had been a long day. If elected president of the United States, McCain would have many long days.
Tuesday, April 08, 2008
LOOK...MORE STUMBLES...
Ok..I swear I'll stop doing this and post a real post..but I have another day off coming and still trying to finish up my fecking laundry..plus I have been playing Farmer Jackie...Ps...I'm not good at it...
cookie moster.....
Monday, April 07, 2008
BACK AWAY FROM THE VAGINA
I know I should be ashamed of myself for laughing my ass off at this article...but I'm not..I say...it's about time women in danger of being raped have the means to protect them selves other than mace or the ole knee to the groin..I don't see being able to buy this device here in America..but I bet if the assholes who rape women knew that this device was waiting for them in their rape victim..they might think twice about raping them..
A rape victim once wished for teeth "where it mattered". Now a device has been designed to "bite" a rapist's penis. The patented device looks and is worn like a tampon, but it is hollow and attaches itself with tiny hooks to a man's penis during penetration."We have to do something to protect ourselves. While this will not prevent rape it will assist in identifying attackers and securing convictions," claims Sonette Ehlers, inventor of the device.Not everyone, however, is convinced of its usefulness. Lisa Vetten, of the Centre for the Study of Violence and Reconciliation (CSVR) says: "It is like we are going back to the days where women were forced to wear chastity belts. It is a terrifying thought that women are being made to adapt to rape by wearing these devices.
'It is a terrifying thought that women are being made to adapt to rape'"We should rather focus our energy on changing men's mindsets and behaviour towards women." Ehlers, of Kleinmond, who has worked for the South African Institute for Medical Research, said she had been seeking a way to help women since meeting a rape survivor 20 years ago who commented that she wished she had teeth in her vagina. "Over the past three years I have been working on this device. It is now completely safe and ready to be manufactured and distributed," she said.It had been designed with engineers, gynaecologists, psychologists and urologists. It was "hygienic - no human hands will be involved in the manufacture".In the event of rape, the device folds itself around the rapist's penis, attaching to the skin with microscopic hooks. It is only when the rapist withdraws that he will realise the device is clamped around his penis.
'He will have to be put under anaesthetic to have it removed'"Its design will also go a long way towards lowering HIV infection as semen is contained in the device ... as well as preventing sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies," Ehlers says.As it is impossible to remove the device from a penis without medical help, hospitals and clinics will be able to alert police when assistance is sought."This will rule out any possibility of the rapist's escaping arrest and speed up conviction." If the rapist tries to remove the device, it will only embed itself further."He will have to be put under anaesthetic to have it removed. He will not be able to leave it as he will be unable to urinate." A woman would have to wear the device every day. "We never know when we might be raped. This device should become a part of every woman's daily routine, just like brushing her teeth." Last year, there were 52 733 reported rapes. In a study, the Gender-Based Violence Programme at the CSVR analysed 162 rapes in Johannesburg's inner city and found that one in four had been a gang rape. The study found that 56 percent of the victims had been raped by two men and 23 percent by three.Although Ehlers is optimistic that the device will go a long way towards reducing the high incidence of rape in this country, rape organisations are not so sure."Women would have to wear this every minute of their lives on the off-chance that they would be raped," Vetten says."I am concerned at how normal rape has become that we would even consider a device like this."Chanaz Mitchell, spokesperson for the National Network on Violence against Women, says although it is a good idea for women to protect themselves, men should take responsibility for their actions."We still need to focus on men as perpetrators of this heinous crime."Mitchell is also concerned that the device might lead to further violence against victims."Once the rapist realises this device is attached to him, he is more than likely to take his anger out on his victim."Mbuyiselo Botha, spokesperson for the Men's Forum, said anything that could empower women should be welcomed. "I would encourage my wife and two daughters to wear this device. It would send a signal to would-be rapists that they won't have it easy."Ehlers intends launching the prototype next month."It will be available at supermarkets, chemists, anywhere where one would be able to buy tampons," she says.The device is to cost R1 and also be available in bulk packs.
A rape victim once wished for teeth "where it mattered". Now a device has been designed to "bite" a rapist's penis. The patented device looks and is worn like a tampon, but it is hollow and attaches itself with tiny hooks to a man's penis during penetration."We have to do something to protect ourselves. While this will not prevent rape it will assist in identifying attackers and securing convictions," claims Sonette Ehlers, inventor of the device.Not everyone, however, is convinced of its usefulness. Lisa Vetten, of the Centre for the Study of Violence and Reconciliation (CSVR) says: "It is like we are going back to the days where women were forced to wear chastity belts. It is a terrifying thought that women are being made to adapt to rape by wearing these devices.
'It is a terrifying thought that women are being made to adapt to rape'"We should rather focus our energy on changing men's mindsets and behaviour towards women." Ehlers, of Kleinmond, who has worked for the South African Institute for Medical Research, said she had been seeking a way to help women since meeting a rape survivor 20 years ago who commented that she wished she had teeth in her vagina. "Over the past three years I have been working on this device. It is now completely safe and ready to be manufactured and distributed," she said.It had been designed with engineers, gynaecologists, psychologists and urologists. It was "hygienic - no human hands will be involved in the manufacture".In the event of rape, the device folds itself around the rapist's penis, attaching to the skin with microscopic hooks. It is only when the rapist withdraws that he will realise the device is clamped around his penis.
'He will have to be put under anaesthetic to have it removed'"Its design will also go a long way towards lowering HIV infection as semen is contained in the device ... as well as preventing sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies," Ehlers says.As it is impossible to remove the device from a penis without medical help, hospitals and clinics will be able to alert police when assistance is sought."This will rule out any possibility of the rapist's escaping arrest and speed up conviction." If the rapist tries to remove the device, it will only embed itself further."He will have to be put under anaesthetic to have it removed. He will not be able to leave it as he will be unable to urinate." A woman would have to wear the device every day. "We never know when we might be raped. This device should become a part of every woman's daily routine, just like brushing her teeth." Last year, there were 52 733 reported rapes. In a study, the Gender-Based Violence Programme at the CSVR analysed 162 rapes in Johannesburg's inner city and found that one in four had been a gang rape. The study found that 56 percent of the victims had been raped by two men and 23 percent by three.Although Ehlers is optimistic that the device will go a long way towards reducing the high incidence of rape in this country, rape organisations are not so sure."Women would have to wear this every minute of their lives on the off-chance that they would be raped," Vetten says."I am concerned at how normal rape has become that we would even consider a device like this."Chanaz Mitchell, spokesperson for the National Network on Violence against Women, says although it is a good idea for women to protect themselves, men should take responsibility for their actions."We still need to focus on men as perpetrators of this heinous crime."Mitchell is also concerned that the device might lead to further violence against victims."Once the rapist realises this device is attached to him, he is more than likely to take his anger out on his victim."Mbuyiselo Botha, spokesperson for the Men's Forum, said anything that could empower women should be welcomed. "I would encourage my wife and two daughters to wear this device. It would send a signal to would-be rapists that they won't have it easy."Ehlers intends launching the prototype next month."It will be available at supermarkets, chemists, anywhere where one would be able to buy tampons," she says.The device is to cost R1 and also be available in bulk packs.
Sunday, April 06, 2008
THE GOD'S ARE BORED #2
I know that I have recommended her before but not strongly enough....Anne Johnson at the God's Are Bored is the smartest, funniest people I read..She never ever fails to amuse me, stimulate my brain or stun me...She's a smarter funnier version of me with all the rough edges smoothed out..If I were the type to have live hero's...she'd be the one...usually my hero's are dead and buried..but Anne is alive and well....She's a pagan who lives in West Virginia, who loves and defends the hill billy residents of her beloved state.. She has 2 kids...the Heir and the Spare, who are little pagans and smart and snappy just like their mother..Plus..she's a water connoisseur...take THAT..She is also responsible for my RoadKill Cafe Sweatshirt...which I love..She is so much smarter and funnier than me, that if I wasn't so assured of my status as the resident smart-ass...I'd be a little afraid to send you to visit her as you might not want to come back...It just doesn't get any better than her blog..check her out..you won't be sorry...
http://godsrbored.blogspot.com/
http://godsrbored.blogspot.com/
Thursday, April 03, 2008
chezebugga...chezebugga
Well, fuck...my 2 days off is coming to an end...Yesterday I swept, swifter mopped, dusted, vacuumed, cleaned bathroom, cleaned kitchen, cleaned stove, planted my peppers and Japanese eggplants and read...didn't leave the house...would have slept longer than I did but Margaret decided to come wake me up...so as politely as I could I let her know that I work now and since I have to smile, chitchat and be cheerful, the last thing I want to do is do it on my day off...especially at 9am in the fucking morning..and I really didn't want anyone coming over before noon time as I am really starting to cherish my time off and like my solitude...maybe I shoulda been less polite..as she came to the house this am at 10:45..yes, normally I would have been up, but I wasn't and would probably still be sleeping (my ass was 
dragging after all the cleaning from yesterday)if she hadn't beat on the fucking door...I refused to answer it..but I was still fucking woke up...2 fucking days off and she wakes me up on both days...So I hauled out my chalk board and wrote:NO VISITORS, YES, THIS MEANS YOU..THANKS JACKIE.
dragging after all the cleaning from yesterday)if she hadn't beat on the fucking door...I refused to answer it..but I was still fucking woke up...2 fucking days off and she wakes me up on both days...So I hauled out my chalk board and wrote:NO VISITORS, YES, THIS MEANS YOU..THANKS JACKIE.It's been up maybe 5 minutes and Claudette from next door comes over to show me her face where she fell last night...excuse the fuck out of me...does this look like a face that gives a fuck?...Knock off the 6-pack night cap Claudette and you won't be falling on your face. Tomorrow when I see her go by the apartment I am going to go give her a bit of news..."Margaret, do you know what I have on my desk?..........it's an alarm clock, and when I want to be work up...I'LL SET THE FUCKING ALARM AND LET IT WAKE ME UP. Until it breaks and I have to buy a new one...I DON'T NEED A FUCKING WAKEUP IN THE MORNING."....is that too harsh?...I can only hope..I don't want to hurt any one's feelings...but you know what?...It's a dirty job..and some one's gotta do it..
The highlight of my day today is Bold Springs Baptist Church made cheezebugga's today...Called Babs and got her order, called work and asked if they wanted anything and then went to Bold Springs Community Center to pick them up..Did I ever mention that Bold Springs Baptist Church is the black church?...I told you it was 1957 here..They have their own church and community center.
They also make the best cheezebugga's around..It's the only food that I eat that I won't share with Annie..and it pisses her off...
When I talked to work to get the chezebugga order I talked to Thom and he asked me how my days off were, said all I did was clean yesterday and if it didn't get cleaned...fuckit..it was staying dirty..I told him I would be down to get the money for the chezebugga's as soon as I squeezed my tits in my bra...he was still laughing when I got to the store...and Inky got a hair cut and bleached his hair the same color as mine...I cracked up...Now we look like mother and son..I wore my Late Show online tshirt and to be cute I put the little round stickers that adhere to your clothes of Obama '08 right on each one of my boobs...right where the nipples would be...Figure that would be funny...except after I left the store I forgot to take them off and wasn't till I got home that I figured out why all the stockers at West Food Mart were doing double takes of me when I walked by..
It's official...the world is going to hell in a hand basket..I flipped thru the tv channels and there's ole Oprah...and who's she got on the show?....A woman who had a sex change to become a man and then got implanted with sperm so she is now pregnant..Judas fucking priest...you know as many children out there that desperately need some one to adopt them, and some asshole decides to do this just so they can get their 15 minutes of fame and be on the Oprah show just chaps my ass..and I have a lot of ass to chap..someone should bip that Dr. and take away their license...She wanted to be a man, fine, I'll all for that...I think that's her/his decision and no body's business, but if she didn't want to be a woman but wanted a baby, why didn't she do it the old fashioned way and then have her operation..She gave up her rights to do 'female' things when she became a he..or am I wrong...? Hell, who knows...
fuckme till I grow balls..
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