I'm a pagan...I'm a liberal..I live in West, Texas..

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

STATE MOTTOS

State Mottos Alabama to Wyoming
Alabama: Yes, We Have Electricity

Alaska: 11,623 Eskimos Can't Be Wrong!
Alaska: Jeez, it's cold.
Arizona: But It's A Dry Heat
Arkansas: Literacy Ain't Everything
California: By 30, Our Women Have More Plastic Than Your Honda Colorado: If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother
Connecticut: Like Massachusetts, Only The Kennedys Don't Own It Yet Delaware: Everything is smaller here!
Delaware: We Really Do Like The Chemicals In Our Water
Florida: Ask Us About Our Grandkids
Florida: America's wang
Georgia: We Put The "Fun" In Fundamentalist Extremism
Hawaii: Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru (Death To Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)
Idaho: More Than Just Potatoes. Well Okay, Not Really, But The Potatoes Sure Are Real Good
Illinois: Please Don't Pronounce the "S"
Indiana: 2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free
Iowa: We Do Amazing Things With Corn
Kansas: First Of The Rectangle States
Kentucky: Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names
Louisiana: We're Not ALL Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign
Maine: We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster
Maryland: If You Can Dream It, We Can Tax It
Massachusetts: Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's (For Most Tax Brackets)
Michigan: First Line Of Defense From The Canadians
Minnesota: 10,000 Lakes And 10,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes Mississippi: Come And Feel Better About Your Own State
Missouri: Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars At Work
Montana: Land Of The Big Sky, The Unabomber, Right-Wing Crazies, And Very Little Else
Nebraska: Ask About Our State Motto Contest
Nebraska: Land of Two Seasons - Winter and Construction
Nevada: Whores and Poker!
New Hampshire: Go Away And Leave Us Alone
New Hampshire: Just like Old Hampshire, but newer
New Jersey: You Want A ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here!
New Mexico: Lizards Make Excellent Pets
New York: You Have The Right To Remain Silent, You Have The Right To An Attorney
North Carolina: Tobacco Is A Vegetable
North Dakota: We Really Are One Of The 50 States!
Ohio: At Least We're Not Michigan
Ohio: Where one of your dad's friends lives
Oklahoma: Like The Play, Only No Singing
Oregon: Spotted Owl - It's What's For Dinner
Pennsylvania: Cook With Coal
Rhode Island: We're Not REALLY An Island
South Carolina: Remember The Civil War? We Didn't Actually Surrender South Dakota: Closer Than North Dakota
Tennessee: The Educashun State
Texas: Si' Hablo Ing'les (Yes, I Speak English)
Utah: Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus
Vermont: Yep
Vermont: Gettin' busy with New Hampshire since 1791
Virginia: Who Says Government Stiffs And Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix? Washington: Help! We're Overrun By Nerds And Slackers!
Washington, D.C.: Wanna Be Mayor?
West Virginia: One Big Happy Family - Really!
Wisconsin: Come Cut The Cheese
Wisconsin: Come Smell our Dairy Air
Wyoming: Where Men Are Men (And The Sheep Are Scared)

21 comments:

billy pilgrim said...

note to self, casa myshkin needs a new motto.

yellowdog granny said...

the state of jackiesue.
We don't give a fuck in all 4 directions..

mrsb said...

Brilliant! I'm so stealing this list!

La Crabcuracha said...

very funny!

Nan said...

I always thought Nebraska's motto should be "just passin' through on the way to someplace better" because everything they use to symbolize the state has a covered wagon heading west on it.

Big Tex said...

Heh, I thought the state motto from Texas was "Fuck you, we're from Texas."

Good stuff.

Nit Wit said...

Ohio, damn even the motto's are dull.

Kulkuri said...

It's not a state motto, but the first time I went to Tahoe I say t-shirts and caps that said, "Texans can't ski because Bullshit ain't white." Or, "If god had meant for Texans to ski, he would have made bullshit white". Having worked with Texans, I have learned that when a Texan says, "Now this is no bullshit" you better pull up your boots because it is going to get deep.

If Florida is America's wang, it is drooping severely and could use a lot of Viagra.

yellowdog granny said...

mrsb:good i stole it from stumble upon..ha
lc:i love stumble upon..
nan:yeah, me too..go west young man..go west..
bigtex:that's not our motto, that's our attitude..hahahahaha
ohio:ohio, we fuck up elections..
kulkuri:one thing i have always admired about us texans..we brag about the worse part of being a texan..we take pride in being the best of the worse...look at our governors..haha
when i was in las vegas i wore a pin that said, if you ain't from texas you aint for shit...i had people offering me $100 for it..i finally sold it for $150..paid $1 for it in texas...so who's dumb?haha

texlahoma said...

It took me a minute to get Tennessee, so I guess that one would work for Oklahoma too!

Sling said...

Sling's Domain..Where the lemonade contains artificial flavor,and the furniture polish is made from real lemon juice.

Big Pissy said...

Cool!

...and I love all the Texas stuff...even though I haven't lived there for years, I still consider myself a Texan. :)

yellowdog granny said...

tex;when i saw that all i could think of was pink floyd's 'we don't need no education, leave us kids alone.'...
sling:uh, i'll just have a coconut and a hammer if i come to your house...
big pissy:if you were born here and raised here, no matter where you move or for how long...you are and always will be...a texan..

Kalibitch said...

these are funny!
loved this:
"Louisiana: We're Not ALL Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign"

sageweb said...

Oh those are so good. I read them to all the yahoos I work with...got some good laughs. Love the Kentucky one.

rebecca said...

Aaahahahahaaaa!!!!

I think WV's should be "No, we don't live near Richmond!"

Elizabeth said...

Made me laugh (and laugh). But then, you always do.

Scottish Toodler said...

California and Missouri!!! ARGH!! I'd better move down to west with you!!!

stupid said...

my state has two and I am not sure I get either one of them...but I'm stupid anyway so whatevah.

texlahoma said...

Oklahoma is a lot like the play, I can't remember were I parked my surrey last night.

Cheesemeister said...

I was born in Colorado and have never been skiing in my life. I think that may be a mortal sin.
I think I could dig Wisconsin, both for the cheese and the fact that their motto invites me to do what I do so well naturally!