I'm a liberal pagan living in West, Texas. Yes. That West, Texas.

Thursday, March 05, 2009

I COULDN'T MAKE THIS SHIT UP

Wednesday is the day the West News comes out..it usually hits the stores about 3 PM...Every one in West rushes to town to pick it up..some even have it delivered to their house. But then you get it a day later and no one can usually wait that long. Wednesday is also the day the new sales start at the grocery stores. So Babs and I usually go into town together and grab our papers, see what's on sale and buy what we need. This week wright bacon was on sale..The regular price is $3.29 a pound...it was on sale for $2.59....so this is me going through Community Grocery....................'BAAAAAAAAAAAAACON, BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACON.' It makes me laugh..I love that stuff..It's thick, meaty, and doesn't shrink down to nothing when you cook it..It's like pig perfume when you cook it in the morning...it lasts all day long...When I croak I want my coffin filled with Blue Bell Rocky Road Ice Cream, Dublin Dr Pepper and fill the rest of it up with wright cooked bacon...
Ok...I don't do the West News that often..maybe once a month or so...used to do it more often but got out of the habit of doing it...and I know I just did one...but like my title says...I couldn't make this shit up.You all know about the meteorite that hit by us and everybody and their ugly cousin are here looking for bits of the meteorite...Offering money and bringing greed to my little hamlet..So what should I find when I buy the paper yesterday? We now have a meteorite sniffing dog...I shit you not.So here's part of the article. (written by Larry Knapek and photos by same.)

"The hunters have come in all shapes and sizes, but it seems that one home-grown hunter may be able to keep her nose closer to the ground as she hunts for those all-so-valuable meteorites.

This local hunter is a canine by the name of Hopper and the Border Collie has become somewhat of a novelty in the meteorite hunting community as word of her finding a meteorite weighing 2.5 ounces began spreading locally.
As the story goes,(break you off a chaw, sit a spell and listen to the story of a meteorite sniffing dog named Hopper.)meteorite hunters Ruben Garcia along with fellow hunters Sonny Clary and Steve Arnold were knocking on doors of some of the landowners in he West area seeking permission to hunt for meteorites on their property.
One such hunter Sonny Clary, was knocking on the door of Pauline Alligood's mobile home when he noticed a black-colored rock(meteorite) on her doorstep. He immediately called Garcia and they set out to locate Alligood with the intention of possibly purchasing the rock, which only days earlier had been making its way through outer space.(insert theme from Star Trek here)
Alligood, who is employed at Sykora Family Ford(the entire family of about 37 works there) in West, said Hopper is still in the puppy stage and is always into everything. "She's always tearing something up. I noticed the rock on the porch but I never thought any thing about it until I got a call from Ruben saying it was a meteorite and he wanted to buy it."
So far that is the only meteorite Hopper has found and brought back.
Hopper is a stray which found her way to Pauline's home only a few months ago, but her recent exploits have given her some reason to feel she has found a home for good. "I've had some offers from some of the hunters to buy her," Alligood said, "but I don't want to sell her."
Garcia said Hopper has caught the eye of more than one of his hunting friends. "It's the first documented time that a dog has found a meteorite and brought it back to it's owner.
Alligood's fiance, Mitch Bynum, also doesn't want to sell Hopper, however he's not opposed to making a dollar or two on the meteorite-finding dog's bloodlines. If she has a liter in the future, they might be for sale.
After all, how many meteorite-finding dogs are there?
See.......I told you I couldn't make this shit up..
To top it, the West Volunteer Fire Department members are making the final preparations for their 16th Annual Barbecue Cookoff set for March 20 an 21 at the West Fair and Rodeo and Westfest grounds. So we'll have chili hounds along with the meteorite-sniffing hounds..
I have to go take a nap, this is just too much excitement for me ..First T.O.'s demise, then the fact that for the first time i almost 5 months I slept all through the night with out having a coughing attack..I've coughed a little today, but they aren't the fits I have been having...It may be my body's way of celebrating from the T.O. news..or ( I thought of this today) the fact that the wind has been blowing like a bastid for the past 3-4 days..So maybe it blew what ever was triggering my cough away..Hot dang.. But I've felt so much better..been out and about today..Went and got boxes for the library. Some lady I had met at the Dr.'s office and I had been talking and I convinced her to give all her books to the library. Nancy and I stacked up 6 boxes of Texas Highway magazines from the 70's to today into my truck so I can figure out what to do with them as they can't use them at the library. But we now have another 6-8 boxes of books to add either to the library or for the book sale..We'll be busy Saturday figuring out what goes where. Surprising how much better you feel when you get some sleep.
Oh....oh...as if I didn't have enough good news...next Thursday the Bold Springs Baptist Church (the ladies this time) are making cheeseburgers...Life is fucking good here in West, By Goddess, Texas.

15 comments:

tsduff said...

There is NOTHING like a good bacon cooked in the morning to make not only the house smell good, but to get the senses working - uuummmm, ALIVE. Almost as good or better than coffee... it's your choice.

I'm so glad to hear you are feeling better by degree - don't know why but me on the other hand I have a cough that sounds like I smoke 24-7 though I haven't smoked since the few wimpy puffs I took in high school. Can't figure it out.

Well, hope you get a cheeseburger or two :)

Jan said...

Prestigious newspapers across the country are going down the crapper and people can't wait to read the West Texas News. I love it. Maybe those prestigious papers DO make their shit up.

Willym said...

The coughing on the decline - now that's a headline I'm am glad to read. The sniffer dog less so but its still beats some of the crap you read in other newspapers.

What would be perfect is some of that bacon - make that a whole lot of that bacon - in a sandwich as I'm reading the news from West.

sageweb said...

I am glad you had a great night of sleep. I also am a lover of bacon..the smell of it..oh..I think I am aroused.

Intense Guy said...

Ah, I'm really glad you are feeling better. Perhaps you coughed up a meteorite and didn't know it?

That is one strange article about the hunting dog. I bet he thinks he's looking for Marijuana and is really a Ganja sniffin' dog?

yellowdoggranny said...

tsduff:baaaaaaacon..talk about a comfort food.
have that cough checked out..coughs are for a reason..not all good.oh i will have me a cheesebugga for sure.
jan:most of the people that read the west news don't read any other paper..it tells us who had a baby, who died, who got married, who's having a garage sale, what's on sale at the 2 grocery stores,who's runing for city council,what the scores were for the local teams, etc. things that matter. these old farts could care less about anything else
willym:love love love bacon sandwich's..and i still think there is a tv movie of the week with west and the meteorite and the dog.
sage:just think ...if they made a douche that tasted and smelled like bacon.hahahahahahahaha
intenseguy:if there was a ganja sniffing dog...he'd have a full time job..

Raspootin said...

Maybe Hopper is an alien disgused as a meteorite sniffin dawg? It would make sense? No ? well maybe not so much; but I think that I like that story best :)

Raspootin said...

Maybe Hopper is an alien disgused as a meteorite sniffin dawg? It would make sense? No ? well maybe not so much; but I think that I like that story best :)

Allan said...

I wonder how Hopper feels about pig perfume?

Sling said...

Waddaya know,..an actual rock hound!..AHAHAHA!
..okay,..that was lame.

Willym said...

Sling - go to your room and don't, I repeat, don't take that Playboy with you!

Elizabeth said...

Hee hee! The boys are joking again Mom!

My dog is clearly a lame loser. The only thing he sniffs out is food and dirty underwear.

Glad the cough is finally abating.

yellowdoggranny said...

raspootin;i know the lady that owns the dog..i put nothing past them.haha
allan:he's a country dog, he's probably fond of it.
sling:leave it to you...ha
willym:yeah, like that's gonna happen.
elizabeth:2 nights in a row..no coughing..and last night i slept 9 fecking hours...it was wonnerful

texlahoma said...

All of the other dogs thought he was crazy but Hopper knew, this rock was special.

Unknown said...

I think we live in the same community....I know we have lots of bacon here, cause its the "Ham Capital of the World", I kid you not...

Glad you are on the mend...