MO'CHRISTMAS STUMBLES

this one is for Joy, Tex and Rox who got the reallly white Christmas..

dexter....

CHRISTMAS STUMBLES.

I'm talking about Christmas stumbles Dude..that's what the fuck I'm talking about. Merry Christmas to all and to all...a good morning..3am and still up. We had snow...not a lot but it was pretty to watch and it stayed on the ground for 6 hours or so...Now it's starting to melt..down to wind chill of 20...I
I took Dexter outside to check it out and he was very interested it the snow flakes, but not enough to get down on the ground.
It's toasty warm in the bed and Dexter was doing some serious cuddling and purring. But I couldn't sleep. So back up I go..I hate this..gets my sleeping all fucked up, then my eating is all fucked up and my sugar gets all wonky..fuckity fuck fuck fuck...Well, since I can't sleep, will go back and red my Vince Flynn book...pretty damn good.. The hero of the book kicks more ass than Jack in 24..He keeps referring to us wimpy liberals keeping him from just capturing the terrorists and killing them out of hand..Hell I'm a wimpy liberal and I say kill em all. Won't hurt my feelings any. ok..I'm off..hope you all have a wonderful Christmas and get what you asked Santa for. I did and even got a White Christmas to go with it. Have a cool yule Dudes...

LETTERS TO SANTA FROM THE KIDS IN WEST, TEXAS

Next to the posts I do on Westfest this is my favorite posts to do. Letters from the little kids, bad spelling and all.
Dear Santa,
I have been a o.k. boy this year. For Christmas I would like a hunting rifle from the Dollar Store and Indiana Jones Action figures, and a 22 rifle with bullets. I would also like Triple A batteries. I will leve milk and cookies by the fireplace for you. Love, Devin Sebera age 9
(kids here like guns, ammo, and stuff for their horses..)

Dear Santa, How are the toys going and how are you and Mrs. Claus doing How is Rudolph doing? I want a new pair coveralls because I am too small for mine and I want some shotgun shells because I am low on them. I want some new boots becasue mine are worn out. your friend, Henry Soukup age 9

Dear Santa, How are you and Mrs. Clause doing? Is it snowing up there? Are the reindeer doing good? Is it cold up there? What are you bringing me this year for Christmas? I want a laptop, I have been good this year. If it was up to me I would get it. Love your friend Cassie Niemeryer age 8.

Dear Santa, How are you today, Good or bad? (Circle it) I want an xbox 360 becus I try to be nice Lee Taylor age 8.

Dear Santa, How are you? Are you doing good. I am. I hope you give me a barbie and a good saddle for my horse. Leave me a big box of present in side and give my mom and my dad a present or two. Will you really do this for me? I want my parents to like it and I want a ZooZoo pet for me. Please give my dog ocean some balls and a tug-a-war rope too. I know she will be happy if you get her something. Thanks. Love your friend. Savanna Everett age 8.
(I know your expecting me to make a crack about her dog getting balls for Christmas, but I'm trying to be good.)

Dear Santa, How are you? Has it been snowing yet? Are you drinking hot cocoa instead of coffee? I bet the elves are really busy. I really deserve a Nintendo DS. I kept my room clean for 2 days!!
I also want a spy kit. I earned it because I did dishes for a week. I would like another WII game. I deserve it because I help with our family dinner. Sincerely, Kate McCaig age 8.
(I like how they think they deserve and earn their gifts by doing a weeks worth of chores.ha)

Dear Santa, How are you? How is Mrs. Clause? How's is the Elves? How's the reindeer? I wan
a basket ball for helping my mom. I wat some clouse becouses I am roning out I want a PSP becouses my other one broke. I want a alerm clock becouse I wock up late on school days. Your friend, Michael age 9.
(can't have Michael wocking up late)

Dear Santa, How are you and Misses Clause doing? What is comit doing? How are the elves? I would like a guitar with a case and NFL football game, an air sal gun, air hog R.C. and a AK47. All because I have been helping out my mom is pregnet with my little brother. Thanks Santa, Johnathan Cardenas age 9(this kid wants a AK47...even for Texas that's a little extreme.)

Dear Santa, How are you doing at the North Pole. Is the puppy Paws toy coming along.Is the cystal mealting! I believe in you! Oh!!!!!! I want a Nintido DSL and a ipod touch please. Also I would like a wii, a for wheeler and a tv in my room, lap top. I think I behaved enough for theese presents! love, Lacy Bradshaw age 8.

Dear Santa, How are you? Are the reindeer okay? Is the toy factory breaking down? I hope every body and every thing is okay. I want a D.S.I with a game. I deserve it because I was washing dishes for 4 weeks and cleaned my room for 5 weeks. Your friend, Angel Fuentes age9

Dear Sant How are you doing in the North Pole? How is Mrs. CLause and all of those elves? I hope they are doing good. How is Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Prancer, Vixin, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen and Rudolph? What I want for Christmas is a vanity set and a nintendo DS game. it is called Style Lab. I have been a good girl this year. I help my mom around the house. I cle and my room and some other stuff. It was kind hard cause ya'll make wonderful stuff. Love always, Kourtney Donnell age 9.
(I can never remember all the names of the reindeer and this 9 year old zips them right out)

Dear Santa, For Christmas I want a new skatebord, a ramp, a robot that does what I say. Caleb J. age 7(this kid just wants something to boss around)

Dear Santa, For Christmas I want a Hors, a piktos, 2 pairs of haos shoos. I love you Santa. You are the best. Lacey S. age 7

Dear Santa, I want Legos, a root beer making kit and a glow board. I know this is a lot to ask, but I want a new roof for my Mom, if you can. But the most favorite thing of all I want is for my family to have a merry Christmas. That's all I want, Santa- you don't have to work too hard. Love, Nick age 7
(there were 270 letters to Santa. So many of them were asking for things for their brothers and sisters and their family...one wanted a go cart for his grandpa so they could go racing together. Plus they ask for stuff for poor kids and one kid said he didn't want as much as he did last year but he had been praying for everyone since 9-11.)

Dear santa, I want a ipod touch because it is so fun. And Dad and Mom won't get me one so I am asking you because you will get me one for sure. So I can count on you. Love, Shay Hill.

Dear Santa, Cud you bren seven beusforu me cud yoo bren a Nievivagog and spechtoe and nuten. Orlando age 6
(I have absolutely no clue what he said...)

Dear Santa, I want a doree lamp and a beske and that is it. Maree crismss. Alana Machac age 6.
(Don't know what she said either.)

Dear Santa, Will you bring me pooping baby? It is called a Baby Alive. I also would like for you to bring me some new clothes and I would like for you to surprise me!! I will leave you some hot chocolate and cookies by the tree. HO! Ho! HO! Love Libby Gerik

This is just the creme of the crop of letters. I love this...cracks me up...They are so sweet..Hope Santa brought them what they asked for..and hope Santa brings you everything you ask for too. Goddess bless you and Merry Christmas. ole Jac

MERRY CHRISTMAS

Just so you don't forget the real meaning of Christmas...

NOONE UNDERSTANDS THAT I'M FROM WEST, TEXAS

Noone understands that I am from West , Texas is a group on Facebook. If you belong to Facebook, czech them out..It's a bunch of people from West who get to whine that no one understands West, Texas is not West Texas...pretty funny..you can stop by and tell them you know where West, Texas is because of my blog. What's funny is I was on the phone and telling Jenny about it and telling her the names of people on it. She kept saying "Oh I remember her, I punched her out in the sixth grade. Or she was in my Bible Class at the Baptist Church and she said Gays were bad and I punched her in the face." This went on for a couple of minutes and I said 'Damn Jenny, between you and your Granny, we've punched out the entire city of West.

Hmm, maybe Kathy's right...it is all my fault..

Joke?

A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's' mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to 'clean up' the bird's vocabulary.Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even more rude. John, in desperation, threw up his hand, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute.Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and said "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior."John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird spoke-up, very softly, "May I ask what the turkey did?"

JENNY AND JASON'S ENGAGEMENT PICTURES

I love all of them but the last one cracks me up..I call it the 'yeah, yeah, yeah, I know ..you love me' look...

At the Christmas dinner at Jenny's she let us know as soon as we got there(Jamie and I were late as Dexter got out of the house 3 times and we had to chase his happy ass all over the place..Both of us cussing him ...I, trying to be 'clean' keep saying :'you have no father, you have no father.'...then under my breath..'you little bastard'...he was having a great time)any way we were late and Jenny said I hope we all have a great time but you all have to be out of her by 8, I have to get up early and go to work.I laughed my ass off...Then when we were talking about the wedding ceremony I asked her if they were going to write their own vows. She said 'hell no, all I want to hear is: 'you wanna marry him, yes. you wanna marry her, yes. Your married, now kiss the bride.' Then go right to the reception. Then she said Jason will probably say I'll stay married to you forever as long as you stay under 150 pounds..Every time she would say something like that her mother would look at me and point her finger at me and say:"she's just like you, it's all your fault"...works for me. On the way Jamie was driving her truck and as we come upon this light it turns yellow and we're aways back and she punches it and goes through the light about 3 seconds after it turned red..I said "Jamie your going to kill us."...she said "I wasn't going to slam on my brakes I have a turkey in the back seat." I said 'yeah, but you have an old turkey in the front seat and I'd rather you had to clean up the cooked turkey from the dash than me."...

Jeez, drive me to drink..Well, I made more pumpkin cheese cakes and pecan pies, and now have 2 batches of chocolate chip cookies. Then...I really am through...I am not making the dog bones..fuck em..My neck and back are killing me..too old for this shit. It's almost 2am, guess I should try to get some sleep. For some reason my sleeping hours are all fucked up..Going to force myself to set the alarm and just get up at 7a.m. no matter what time I go to sleep..and no naps...maybe I'll be sleepy at a normal time...yeah, right.

HOT DAMN IT'S MONDAY STUMBLES

I was so hyper from last night that I didn't go to Kulkuri
sleep until 11a.m. and when I was telling babs she said what did you drink? I said diet coke and then water..she said it was all the caffine and since I never drink anything with caffine..that was probably it..gee..now I figure it out..sigh*

Karl

blueberry

rainwolf

Nitty

billy

homer

ted

tex

twain12

jan

me and vicki

willym

me jan, big pissy, wel...all of us chocolate lovers

babs

rainwolf

the other ted

john

dexter

kevin

java

me

kim

uh..dexter again.