GAINFULLY EMPLOYED

Yes, the unbelievable has happened...I have a job..I start...well, I'm not sure when I start...maybe Monday, maybe Thursday...When Babs and I were doing our 4 fucking hour tour of West business's, singing Janis Joplin and making fun of the help at said business's...I got a job offer..My friend Inky is the assistant manager at the Family Dollar and asked me if I was interested in working..I said, yeah, but it would have to be part time and if I made too much money it would make my rent go up, so probably couldn't work much more than 20 hours a week(don't think I can handle standing on my feet for much longer than that a week either).So I went in today and talked to Thom the manager and filled out the application and took it back..I knew he would already be gone so I gave it to Inky and said most of the places I had worked were out of business except for Hastings and he said, 'hell, it doesn't matter, you already have the job.'...He said Thom said I would probably start Monday(he told me Thursday)...so one of the two..He asked me if I had any days I couldn't work and I said no, except during Football season that I couldn't work when the Cowboys were playing...He laughed, and I said, no, I'm serious..I can't work and miss the Cowboys..I can work while they're on, but I don't think you'd like me at the register with ear phone hooked to a radio and me screaming 'run mother fucker run'... He assured me they could work around the Cowboy's schedule..
As for Babs and my little 4 fucking hour jaunt into town..you can read about it on her blog...All I will say is I think we sang 'Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz, my friends all drive Porsche's I must make amends...'just fucking beautiful'...When I hit that really high note on Worked hard all my life time ...well, dogs howl...and baby's cry...it's a thing of beauty...Babs has some fetish about weird yard toys...I insisted she get some gnomes, but she has an aversion to them...which is why I went and bought one and I'm going to sneak over to her house tonight and plant it right in the middle of her flowers...It's a little gnome with a shovel...I call him 'Dude'....We went to the used shit store, where we ran into one of the other little ole ladies from the Apts. she sort of reminds me of the absent minded witch on Bewitched...Then we hit the hardware store, where I was pissed to find out that bird seed went up from $3.99 to $4.49 for a 20 lb. bag...jeez Louise...Found some more flower/vegetable seeds...only found basil for herbs...Westites think paprika and pepper are the only spices and the only herb is...well, I don't think they use herbs...We hit both grocery stores and both Dollar stores, went to Jack & Diane's where we got to meet Jack and Diane...Jack is huge and Diane was busy counting the money from the machines...I shot a game of pool and sucked big time..I can't see to play with these damn bi-focals...Babs had BBQ sandwich with fries and banana pudding...I had a cheeseburger and a unsweetened tea...I should have waited till Bold Springs Baptist Church makes their hamburgers as all hamburgers pale in comparison to theirs...We left the house about 12:30 and got back around 4:30..what in the hell we did for 4 hours is beyond me...But we had fun...I got 2 canisters with blue bonnets on them...really kind of girly for me, but as they are Texas flowers, it made it ok...Babs got a tacky ugly frog...and we got to sing songs to the citizens of West....I wish you could have seen us singing 'staying alive staying alive..ah..ah..ah.ah..staying alive'..in her suv...waving our fingers and bobbing our heads...giggling like 9 year olds...It's fun to have a partner in crime..plus with the 2 of us as a team, it makes the cops think twice before hauling our asses off to jail..Life is good...fuckme till I sing bass...