......HENRIETTA AND DAM NEWS.......

This happened about a month ago, when Nancy Pelosi became head of da house...I was at the library and commIted to Henrietta (who is a Catholic, prude, republican) about I wish they would impeach Bush and Cheney(sometimes I say shit like this just to watch that one eye of hers twitch and her mouth jerk sideways..She was horrified. She said 'No, then that Nancy woman would be president."..I said 'What would be wrong with that?'...she said she would try to make everyone like the rest of them in San Francisco....homosexuals.'(I swear to the Goddess I am not making this up.) Shaking my head, I said 'Henrietta, no one can make you homosexual, besides I don't have any problems with homosexuals, I don't even think about their sex life.....No more than I think about you and George having sex, I don't think about other people having sex'...longgggggggggggg pause...."Do you think about homosexuals having sex all the time Henrietta?...do you think about people having sex at all? I don't meet someone and think, gee I wonder how he and his wife have sex, does she get on top or does he make her bend over...?" Holy shit!......
I thought she was going to dislocate her jaw and twitch to death...She snapped her mouth shut so fast and tight I'm surprised he didn't chip her teeth...since then we haven't had any more conversations on homosexuals...Dangit!
Ok, the DAM News....Last Wed. Patients, doctors and advocates gathered in Austin to encourage the Legislature to pass a bill allowing a medical defense to marijuana possession charges..
Yeah, this will happen when Henrietta holds a wine and smokes party for Gays and Lesbians.

'Toke Toke Toke that Cigarette...'

This is a quote from the Points section in the Sunday paper..
"I will not be part of any church that unleashes its clergy to preach that particular individuals or faith groups are damned."---Don Larsen, former Pentecostal pastor and ex-U.S. Army chaplain, who converted to Wicca after witnessing religious strife in Iraq.
Yes, lets hear it for the Wicca's and Pagans...

Report:Infant mortality rate at a 10-year high..
The infant mortality rate in Dallas County is the highest it's been in 10 years.Experts attribute the rise in infant mortality to several factors, including barriers to prenatal care and health insurance. The leading causes of infant death are premature birth(55%), congenital abnormalities(23%), infections(6%) and sudden infant death syndrome (5%). The report also found that significant racial disparities exist. In 2004, 49% of the infants who died were Hispanic, 35% were black and 11% were white.
I wonder of that 49% Hispanic babies how many were born of illegal parents?...But since they can't ask that question of them,we won't know..and can someone please tell me where Hispain is????


This may be the weirdest thing I read this week...
QUESTIONS SWIRL AROUND GREEN MOUNTAIN IN CHINA...
Shanghai,China--Villagers in Fumin County are wondering why a barren mountainside was painted green. Workers who began spraying Laoshou Mountain last August said they were doing so on orders of the county government but were not told why, media reports said...A woman who answered the phone at the county forestry department but refused to give her name said, "This is an order from above. You should ask the leader from above.".....(They would ask him but he is too busy building toy bombs)

COIN SUGGESTS CLEOPATRA WAS NO LOOKER.
London--Maybe Mark Antony loved Cleopatra for her mind. That's the conclusion being drawn by academics at the University Of Newcastle from a Roman denarius coin that depicts the Egyptian queen as a sharp-nosed and thin-lipped with a protruding chin.When we think of Cleopatra we think of Elizabeth Taylor's Cleo, but she looked more like this...

She is butt ugly..So I figure she either was brilliant or gave great head...or possibly both...I like the idea that she is butt ugly...Butt ugly and still did some serious damage to the Roman Empire..Sort of a Egyptian version of Ugly Betty..

Remember back when I said I was confused why Good Hair Perry was endorsing a bill to make it mandatory for all girls under the age of 18 to have the HPV shot..??????? It's all coming perfectly clear now...MONEY...THE GREEN STUFF...LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS OF GREEN STUFF..
Gov. Rick(Good Hair)Perry's chief of staff met with key aides about the HPV vaccine the same day its manufacturer (Merck & Co.) donated to his campaign...Chief of Staff Deirdre Delisi's calendar shows she met with the governor's budget director and three members of his office for an "HPV Vaccine for Children Briefing" on Oct. 16th.
That day, New Jersey-based Merck & Co.'s political action committee donated $5,000 to Perry, $2,500 to comptroller candidate Susan Combs and $2,000 to four state lawmakers.(This is the money we know about, this doesn't count the under the table money I am sure was passed..) The calendar and other documents obtained by the AP show Mr. Good Hair's office began meeting with Merck lobbyists about the vaccine as early as mid-August, months before social conservatives-who are now those most outraged by the order-helped re-elect him in November.
Good Hair spokesman Robert Black said the timing of the meeting and the donation was a coincidence.(Yeah, fucking right.)The order the governor issued this month directed the Texas Health and Human Services to adopt rules requiring the shots for girls entering sixth grade as of September, 2008...
That fucker...it's always about money with them fucking republicans..I wonder how all those conservatives feel about re-electing him now?....Reminds me of the story about the rabbit and the snake both needing to cross the river...I'm sure you all know it...moral of the story...don't be surprised when you get bit by a snake no matter what he tells you..that's what snakes do...

This was not so much funny as sad...A couple of weeks ago a man was found dead and mummified in front of his TV after a year...The TV was still going ...No one checked on him...no one cared...that is just fucking sad...I would probably be found before I became a mummy, but not before Annie had dined on me...

THE HIGHER POWER OF LUCKY...
Have ya'll heard about the shit hitting the fan over this kids book?..
On the first page of the book The Higher Power of Lucky, by Susan Patron, this year's winner of the Newberry Medal, the most prestigious award in children's literature.The book's heroine, a scrappy 10-year-old orphaned Lucky Trimble, hears the word through a hole in a wall when another character says he saw a rattlesnake bite his dog, Roy, on the scrotum.
"Scrotum sounded to Lucky like something green that comes up when you have the flu and cough too much," the book continues. "It sounded medical and secret, but also important."...Librarians all over the country are having shit fits...saying it was a 'Howard Stern-type shock treatment just to see how far they could push the envelope..
It has been banned from Libraries in the South,the West and the Northeast. The book is written for children 9-12 but that some librarians countered that since the heroine is 10, children older than that would not be interested in reading it...(not before maybe, but I bet you a Dublin Dr. Pepper they will be flocking to the Library to read it now.)One teacher who is pushing the banning said that she has heard from dozens of librarians who agree with her stance. "I don't want to start an issue about censorship,"she said."But you won't find men's genitalia in quality literature."
"At least not for children," she said...

Oh for fuck's sake..get a life you old hens...
I am going to work at the library Tuesday and Saturday for Henrietta...I think I will ask her to get the book for the library..I'll say one thing for ole H...nothing gets her riled up more than censorship and people telling her to pull some book off her shelf..(well, other than me and my conversations about homosexuals)...she'll buy a copy full price just to piss them off...
(PS.......Wrote this yesterday to post today..worked at the library and was looking at new books that need to be cataloged and put out..guess what I found???? yup..."The Higher Power Of Lucky.'...Henrietta had already bought it...that's my gal...)

OK, that's all the news that's fit to print...
fuckme till I'm censored..