I'm a liberal pagan living in West, Texas. Yes. That West, Texas.

Friday, November 30, 2007

OK...i KNOW THAT YOU REEEEEALY DON'T CARE



But the Cowboys won yet again(37-27)...and we beat a great team...actually next to the Cowboys, the Packers are my favorite team...I have always been a huge Packer fan..even when they kicked out ass in the Ice Bowl...If we'd won that game, the Super Bowl trophy would probably be called the Landry Trophy instead of the Lombardi Trophy..The only bad part of the game is that Farve got hurt..I really really hated to see that..He's such a great competitor and he's having the season of his life and I hope won't be out long..He deserves a shot at the playoffs , just as long as they don't beat us to get there..But this win will probably keep us out of Lambeau Stadium for the playoffs..We will have home field advantage...rather play where it's maybe 50 degrees out instead of 50 below..

It was a very interesting night..As the game was on NFL Channel and my crappy cable company doesn't have it, I met my friends Inky and Anessa at Wolf's Sports Bar in West..It's not a big place but it's really nice and have 7 screens and one of them was the size of my living room...I was only in there about 20 minutes before the smoke started to get to me..I told Inky I couldn't believe how I could stand all that smoke when I used to drink in bars for so many years..then we both looked at each other and said "cause you were(I) was drunk."...What they say about "the girls are prettier at closing time"...is true...by 10:15 I had 3 different guys come on to me...One guy did his little spiel and I just laughed and said:"I don't think so, I wouldn't have fucked you even when I was a drunk."....So then he introduced me to his friend 'Randy'..who he said was the most illegible bachelor in West. I looked at Randy and said:"I think I'm too old for Randy."...Randy said, "nah, your probably about my age, maybe a little older."..I said "how old are you Randy?"
he said "48"...I laughed like a maniac..and told him...I just turned 64 Randy..No thanks..they still had their mouths open when I walked off..still laughing..(Wonder if this has anything to do with the fact that I bleached my hair back blond?...it's sort of strawberry blond, like mojo's)Then good ole Pat. A. who put his arm around my shoulder and whispered in my ear:"you know ..you still got it Jackie"....and I whispered back:"and you still ain't getting any of it Pat."...Told Inky if I stayed till closing I could actually get lucky..I'd be drop dead gorgeous by then...
I had to come home and take a shower and wash my hair to get all the smoke off me..icky poo...But it was pretty fun...I am so used to being at home screaming and yelling anything I want to at the TV screen that I forgot and screamed at Wade Phillips(coach for cowboys)...'throw the fucking flag you asshole'...the table right by us cracked up and one guy high fived me..I said I was sorry I was just used to saying what ever I wanted at home without worrying about offending anyone..they assured me that I only said what they were thinking so after that I just screamed and yelled to my hearts content and getting high fives..They especially liked it when I threatened to put my Baby Phat in the ass of some jerk who always roots against the Cowboys just to be obnoxious..He thinks he's being funny and no one ever calls him on it..except no one told me that..and I said if he cheered for the Packers one more time he was going to be spending the rest of the night at Hillcrest Emergency Room getting my Baby Phats removed from his ass...he got his feathers ruffled and went to Coyote Bob's...I got a round of high fives and 2 bottles of water(which is what I was drinking....boy that was weird)It still feels strange to be in a bar and especially in a bar and drinking water...One of my old friends that I hadn't seen in forever sent over a Lone Star Lite...and when I went and thanked him and told him I didn't drink anymore..he almost fell off his stool..He asked me how long it had been and I said 17 years..He
freaked out..then drank my Lone Star..guess he didn't want it to go to waste..It makes my old drinking friends nervous to be around me now that I've quit drinking...they look at me and know that I drank them under the table every night and now..I'm sober 17 years..and their still drinking and getting drunk every night..So I never stay and chat long..they look so uncomfortable..like I have cancer and they might get it..I just like the look on their face when I say "17 years"....ahh, life is good...

fuckme till everyone's sober...

18 comments:

Mouthy Girl said...

Don't you just know that HG called me AT WORK to inform me of the victory over the Packers. He was positively preening, I tell ya!

I would have paid big bucks to be a fly on the wall during that game. I think you and I could do some serious damage together! Can't wait to see what happens!

Jan said...

Not bad having guys 20 years younger hitting on you, that must make you somewhat happy even if you don't take them up on the offers.

I was looking forward to playoffs at Lambeau though. Cold, snow, frozen tundra...

Anonymous said...

You know I could give a rat's ass about football, but I would pay money to see you in action at Wolf's.

We need to swap come-on stories some day! I've got some doozies!

yellowdoggranny said...

BG:yeah, I got all sorts of phone calls from friends today about the game..oh I can't wait till westfest and for you to come down..
Jan;believe me..not for one moment did i think it was how i looked or anything like that..i know it was the fact that the guys outnumbered the girls 5 to 1 and i have big tits...and they were pretty drunk...as drunk as they were..i probably looked like dolly parton to them...
bratprince:i should have called you and told you to come down..it really was fun...and anessa didn't smoke at the table just for me..as if i could tell with everyone else smoking...come on by..you have the number ..call and I'll fix dinner and we'll bullshit, check out my books and tell lies...

Heidi said...

It makes my old drinking friends nervous to be around me now that I've quit drinking...they look at me and know that I drank them under the table every night and now.

They shouldn't be nervous. I mean, it could be worse for them. For instance, you could start preaching to them like SOMEONE I know who used to party a lot in college and say, "Oh, I don't drink anymore because I'm a Christian and drinking is a SIN and you're all going to hell."

BBC said...

They still smoke in bars there? That was banned here over a year ago.

"I wouldn't have fucked you even when I was a drunk.""

Ha, ha, ha.... Have a good day, hugs.

the rube said...

ever feel jealous when you see someone shit faced and having a real good time?

i do.

AngelConradie said...

its great fun to watch a sporting event with another crowd sometimes!
yay for the cowboys!

Unknown said...

Yeah, you still got it! You need to post pics of the new "do" so all of us can marvel at how hot Granny still looks

mckait said...

I never went to bars... never really drank.. aside from a few times in high school and on my 25th birthday. I got drunk that day.. sad.. feeling sorry for myself...

Kelly's is just in the last three years or so.. and I rarely have more than a pint maybe two of Guinness. I always want more..

The smoke is a problem....if I use my inhaler its bad.. it I do not.. bad again.. oh well.. worth it for the music and folks..

take care there jac!

BBC said...

"this is texas...we take our freedoms seriously...the cigarette will be the second to last thing to be pried out of their cold dead hands.."

I suppose, no matter how stupid they are. But even I do smoke I did vote for the smoking ban because because I see how stupid it is. :-)

yellowdoggranny said...

hmhh:it does make them nervous..they see me and know in their drunk little hearts of hearts they should stop too, but either can't or won't..so I make them feel guilty...
bbc:ok..
leo:nope..not ever..I have no desire to drink, get drunk or be drunk...if someone gave me a pill and said if i took it, i could drink like a normal person and never have to worry about it again i still wouldn't drink..been there ..done that..besides being diabetic kind of puts a damper on it too...
angel:you know it really was fun..except for the smoke..
junebugg:when i get my new computer set up with the scanner printer, i will show off my new hair color and style...same one I had when i was 30..ha...
Kath:I'm glad i don't drink anymore..just wish i had done it waaaaaay sooner..

Cyberoutlaw said...

I know a couple of guys like that too. Anytime you run into them they want to get you drunk. Most of them are in their 50's now too. I never felt good drinking. I'd usually wake up feeling like I had just given Bush power of attorney over my vast estate.

Cie Cheesemeister said...

Its been a long time since I partied till the guys in the bar were cute!
These days I can't even stay awake through a hockey game. Woe is me.

Nit Wit said...

I haven't been in a bar since 1992 but I do knock back beer on my nights off. I used to be the nice guy who was always around if you needed a friend. High stress and problems with my gut and I decided to focus on people who were in my immediate family. They were more important than all my close personnel friends in the Miller mansion. Funny, I don't miss them much.
I do enjoy my own company though.
Talking about that football again. Bad habit and I'll pray for you.
It can only end in heartbreak you know. Unless they win it all and then we'll have to duck and cover to duck and cover from a Jackiesue celebration. Texas isn't where the nukes are tested. I think I might just keep my head down for a couple of weeks.
The more things change the more they stay the same.

Nit Wit said...

Gee, I'm more scattered than most days.

Allan said...

I hate that 'nervousness' thing...I don't care if they wanna get hammered. I encouraged my last date to drink heavily, in fact.

Hit on by the youngins...17 years have been kind! Congrats!

yellowdoggranny said...

cyberoutlaw:i just like not having an excuse for my bad behavior except I'm an asshole..
cheesy:Hell, I can't stay awake through a hockey game either...booooring...ha
nitwit:I can't help myself..I'm hooked on the sport of football,and really hooked on the cowboys...but unless they play on nfl channel again, I doubt if I'll be going back to a bar again...too many drunks and way too much smoke..I like your company too...I know they will break my heart..but at least they won't give me clamitia...snort*
allan:It's not like I ask THEM to quit drinking...I could care less..and it doesn't bother me..but it sure does bother them...oh well, their problem..not mine..