I'm a pagan...I'm a liberal..I live in West, Texas..

Sunday, March 21, 2010


I weighted the options....bunch of ole Dem's or BBQ....Dem's....BBQ. well fuck..there was no way I was going to Waco to sit around a auditorium with a bunch of Texas Dem's when I could stay home, drive right up the road, across the tracks and be ass deep in BBQ. Hell yes. So I slept late and drove up there in time to judge the ribs and brisket. All I missed is the chicken..and as much as I love BBQ'd chicken..judging it isn't much fun. Seems like of the 3 it's the easiest to fuck up. Raw chicken or tough chicken...nah...I'll pass. Ran in to a bunch of people I knew and got snubbed by the local women of West as usual. They know I'm not Czech and I'm not married..so I'm treated like a leper...old crunts. Of course my Roadkill Sweatshirt might have pissed them off too. I can only hope. I had some time between judging the ribs and the brisket so I went to the apartment and got a couple of bags of books that I had finally decided to get rid of (it still hurts) and took them to Mike's daughter Marissa. The smartest 13 year old in West. War and Peace, Hamlet, Tess of D'Urbyville(did I spell that right?)Two Japanese dictionaries, a German dictionary, a book on how to draw, and some other books.. She was napping..she had gotten up early to go to the library for Tall Tellers. They won an award from the State of Texas for what they have done at the library with the Tall Tellers. When it makes the West Paper I'll post about it..It's really a big deal. Some of the library's that were entered were big ones and we were just happy to be in the running..To actually win is a very big deal. I'm so proud of them. Nancy has done such a wonderful job and we're lucky to have her. She was out this past week...a delicate situation....SHE HAD HER ASS OPERATED ON.. I'm sure she wouldn't like every one know she's has to sit on a blow up ring for a while..which is why I'm telling you. I had the same operation done in the late 70's so we were comparing ass stories. I was saved by actually living in an apartment that had a bidet...saved my ass....There are still claw marks on each side of the bidet. Man...that shit hurts..in more ways than one.
OK..enough of asses...now to the good stuff..the BBQ. The ribs were really good. I gave out 3 9's..no 10's but I really liked the ribs..Some had some great glazes on them. A few were tough as boots. The brisket was a challenge. Only gave one 9...and it was damn near perfect. They could be deceiving though..they would be so tender they would fall off the fork, and look and smell delicious..then you'd pop it in your mouth and they would have so much salt your ass would pucker.(I'm having a thing with asses today)and who ever thought it was a good idea to put Cinnamon in BBQ sauce? Let me tell you right now folks..it's a very bad idea. The best part of the BBQ judging was I made a new buddy. You know me...I can and will talk to a stump. So first thing I asked him if I know him?...Is he married to Margaret?(Inky's sister) He says no, but who ever is married to Margaret must be a real good looking guy. So I like him right away. He's a smart ass. So we talked for a while. He's from Texas, went off to school and found a job in Manhattan(not New York City..but Manhattan...I like that.)Been trying his whole life to get the fuck out of Texas and ends up in Manhattan for 8 years and was happy as a clam.. So naturally his job sends him to Dallas. Not a happy camper. But like I told him..could have been worse..they could have sent him to Houston. He and his buddies were leaving last night to go to Austin for the SXSW thingy ..I told him he'd love Austin. Plus I think he said his job was opening up an office in Austin and he was going to try and get transferred there. Oh, his name is Jason. Big ole Texas boy. I told him all the good places to get beer, kolaches, skunk eggs and about Shady Lane and Brewster as he has a boat and when he gets there will need some one to keep it up for him.
I took his picture and said I hoped he didn't object to being in my blog..he said no and took down the addy for it. So if your reading Jason..."Howdy"...
Soon as I find out who won the BBQ Contest I'll post about it.
I also got a phone call from David O's daughter Sara and she was in West and I went over to see her and her baby(who she said she would name after me and didn't.) So I call him Jackson or Jack and don't care if his name is Dustin Cole. Hes 2 months old and so cute..he's golden..golden hair and skin tone. Kenna Jo, Jessica's (Sara's sister) little girl is 6 months and the happiest kid you've ever seen. She was asleep when I got there and when she woke up, she looked around and had the biggest grin on her face. She has mastered the 'fake cough'...and loves to give the raspberry. Two beautiful baby's....Jenny and Jason are at odds about a baby. Jason wants one now and Jenny wants a new car and wants to wait 5 years. ( I think Jason may win on this one, but then Jenny usually gets her way...ha)I told her I wanted her to have a baby before we were both in diapers.
Took some new pictures of Dexter, my pots that are now seeded with lettuce, parsley, chives, basil, egg plant and oh yeah..more lettuce. Of course the next day after I planted them was spring and a fucking northern'er blew in and it's freezing outside..I pulled them up on the porch and left the porch light on all night long for 2 nights. There is even talk of snow..but so far only Dallas and Oklahoma is getting it..well, all of North Texas...Tina in Amarillo is ass deep in snow too. We have sun, cold and gusting winds up to 40 miles an hour. Yesterday when it was 37 Dexter insisted he had to go outside..So when I went to check the mail I let him out..he ran out the door like the bullet train and got to right past the end of the building which sort of blocks the wind and came to a screeching halt. That wind hit him and he stopped, looked around and puffed up like a puffer fish. I got the mail, came back and he was laying in the parking lot on his back with feet straight up in the air. Looked like he was dead..I called his name and he jumped up and raced back to the apartment..beat me to the porch..Hasn't tried to get out since.
Well I'm a happy camper..so far Baylor has won both of it's basketball games. Gooooo Bears.
Gotta run..still have to get the Monday post ready to cheer y'all up.. Have a great weekend..and y'all come back and see me..y'hea?
Oh...I'm posting the pictures seperate..fecking blogspot..


Debra She Who Seeks said...

Sounds like you had a great weekend! And I got a huge laugh out of Dexter lying on the parking lot with his legs straight up! Big baby!

Twain12 said...

darn, now i'm craving BBQ :P

Anonymous said...

As a Texas expatriate living in the Rockies, I envy your BBQ experience. They say they have BBQ here, but they also say the Denver Broncos can win the Super Bowl.

Out here there is far too much in the way of North Carolina-influenced BBQ, which is to say that some folks consider sloppy joes with a dash of liquid smoke to be fine fare indeed.

Rainwolf said...

Now I want ribs dammit. Too late to find any good ones.
On the other hand, I've eaten a hell of a lot of ham this weekend so I probably just need something to absorb the salt.
Sounds like you had fun.

the ex Mrs.B said...

If looks could kill I'd have been dead years ago.
My ex Czech mother in law was the "Queen of Old Crunts" in West.
Even with a Polish name with 3 c's & 3 z's 12 letters long I was a nobody. LMAO
Don't miss her, but damned sure miss the PIT BBQ.

Nit Wit said...

Way up here it's been warm and almost summer like.
We seem to have switched weather.
BBQ and snow seem to be a strange combination.
The people around here don't seem to so tightly bound by tradition or ethnic ties as West. It's more an everyone for themselves kind of place.
I think it is sort of a reflection of how deeply ingrained the Republicans are around here.
But then they are down Texas way too from what you say.