I'm a liberal pagan living in West,Texas..yes that West,Texas

Thursday, January 25, 2007

...........RECEIVED THIS CARD ALMOST 20 YEARS AGO.......





I watched an ant climb a blade of grass this morning. When he reached the top, his weight bent the blade down to the ground....Then twisting his thorax with insectile precision, he grabbed hold of the next blade. In this manner, he traveled across the lawn, covering as much distance vertically as he did horizontally, which amused and delighted me.
And then, all at once, I had what is sometimes called an "epiphany," a
moment of heightened awareness in which everything becomes clear. Yes, hunched over that ant on my hands and knees, I suddenly knew what I had to do.................................


QUIT DRINKING BEFORE NOON....

13 comments:

apositivepessimist said...

arrhaaha...are you still mates with the person who sent it to you?

ooooh am I FIIIIRST!!

eat my panties losers!

Anonymous said...

Yeah, this proves that ants are too complicated for Fuckya, so maybe the pick-up stix are better, get the kind with the "safety" tips, not the 'pointy' ones...the only way I was ever able to not drink before noon was to sleep until 1 pm.

yellowdog granny said...

apos: we are still mates but she died 3 years ago on new years eve..you would have loved her..when we ran together our friends called us lavern and shirley as we were always getting into the weirdest situations..all involving drink and drugs..
allan;yup, i found that you cant get a hangover if you never stop drinking..

Carina said...

ROTFLMAO!!!!!! So profound. :)
Ya know, since I quit drinking I have zero patience for sloppy/boring/annoying drunks. Unfortunately I know a few. Nice folks when sober. Irritating as shit when drunk.
I had an incident over the weekend with a friend and her annoying drunk of a boyfriend visiting. I tried to be tolerant and nice and everything. Then I kicked him out of my house and told them he is not welcome here any more unless he is 100% sober (Like THAT ever happens.)
And you know what? That felt really, really good!

jan said...

Ah, yes, but the ant does experience life's peaks and valleys, not just the mundane.

yellowdog granny said...

carina: there is nothing worse than a exdrunk..we have no patience for drunks and will slap them into sobriety in a blink of an eye..I bet it did feel good..call him up and do it again..
jan:jeez..who know's its just a fucking ant...

tina(bedrock girl) said...

Hey Granny :) Hows the new digs and computer and stuff ?

Anonymous said...

Now we are talking about ants and drinking, this damn blog is a freak parade and I love it! :)

Anonymous said...

i can't decide if i feel sorry for drunks or envy them.

can your ant move a rubber tree plant?

Mimi said...

lol, I thouht it would say "squish the ant". That is great that you still have the card especially since your friend has passed.

yellowdog granny said...

tina: going to do a post on new digs, computer etc..
nancy: ya...you never know what you're going to get here...different post for each of my personalities..
ruby: I think that everyone should get rip roaring, falling down on your ass drunk at least once a year...except for me...I have to be sober to tell you what you did and laugh at you.
Mimi: i have every card that anyone has given me since I moved back to texas in the late 70's...don't ask me why..i just do...

Autumn said...

Hey Jackie
Just dropped in to say hi..Glad your back to posting everyday again.

Anonymous said...

I used to have a neat black cat who liked watching the ants.
She would also attack my feet when I tried to sleep at night. I was seven years old, and I would cry. Other than the foot-attacking she was a very nice cat. Her name was Betsy, as in Betsy Ross.