I am sure that I have told the story about how I came to quit smoking, but in case you guys missed it it seems to be worth the retelling. I worked as a waitress, bartender at several bars in Portland,Oregon when the boys were young(before Maryjo was born) and their Dad was not around much at all, so basically it was me and my two sons.Back then cigerettes were .35 cents a pack....heehee..anyhow...I smoked 4 packs of camels, non filter every day..During this time there was a big story in the news about this man who had been married and had a son and gotten a divorce and was a really great father while the mother was pretty much a drunk and left the kid alone alot. In the meantime the father had come out as being gay and had a partner. Because of the mother's lack of care and the fact that the father was a much better parent he sued for full custody of his son and his partner was was willing to adopt him so he would have 2 parents.Today it is not that big of a deal, but back then..it was a really big deal. So I lit up a cigarette one day and Thom threw his self in my lap and started crying...just sobbing and weeping. I freaked out and wanted to know what was wrong. Thom finally quit crying long enough to sob out that if I kept smoking I was going to die of cancer, he was going to be an orphan and a homosexual couple was going to adopt him.I laughed my ass off. But little t-Tom was dead ass serious and would follow me all thru the house weeping this lament every time I lit up.i would hide in the bathroom to smoke and you could see his little fingers wiggling under the door and hear "mommie, mommie,don't die, the homosexuals will adopt me"...he would follow me to the car when I would sneak out and he was so short I couldn't see his head but there were those 2 little arms and hands wiggling back and forth...and "mommie, mommie.....what is a homosexual and why do they want to adopt me?....."...well, adventually he wore me down..it was easier to quit a 4-pack-a-day habit than to listen to that kid cry every time i snuck a cigarette...and other than weed, he doesn't smoke either. Now if you're really having trouble and want to stop smoking..I can send Thom to your house as he is still as obnoxious now as he was then.....
And fyi, the guy got custody of his son and lived hapily ever after.
7 comments:
Too funny ! I know it is meant to be serious , but ... hehehhe
Granny ,granny don't die ,I love your comments,if you stop smoking the homosexuals will come get you!
I know in jr high and elementary school, they told kids to try to get their parents to quit smoking. My parents never smoked.
Good thing I don't have kids to bug me about smoking. I have a step-mom for that.
LOL at your story though!!
Back in the good ole' days when you could smoke and drink as a lifestyle, my mother tried to smoke but never got the hang of it, so she didnt take up the cigatette. My father was like you, a 4-packs a day person. He used Nicoban gum which helped some but then he traded this for smelly cigars in the '60's. I hate cigars to this day. Then he smoked a pipe for a few years until he was all done with tobacco. Now I like pipe smoke, esp. the cherry flavor. I smoked until I got pregnant and it was easy to quit because I couldn't stand the smell of cigarette smoke, meat cooking or coffee. I went back to the cigarette in the mid-80's for a while when I was going thru a very bad period in my life but laid it down for good when things got better. That's the cutest cigarette-quitting story I ever heard, kids are funny huh
What a great story! I laughed out loud reading it and thought "there's no denying that one, Jac!" :-)
The schools made my boys PC Nazis about smoking and drinking. I'm talking from kindergarten on. They have mostly gotten over it now but the younger one starts in on me about the beer still siting in the frig. I quit smoking 4 years ago just to shut them up and save money to buy more beer. :)
Great story. Kids can really be instrumental in how we live our lives.
LMAO!!!!
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